I Recently Rescued A Stray (partially Feral) Kitty

[Kriskopop]

Hi there, wondering/hoping I can get some guidance. I had a stray kitty show up one day in my yard about 5 weeks ago and I started feeding her and then after a week of that I bought her a heated cat shelter for backyard which she claimed for her own and then a week or two later I borrowed a trap and caught her to bring her to vet for checking out and for spaying. She used to always stare at me and slowly blink her eyes and she left us a present one night on our steps. She was always alone. I had high hopes she was a stray and that we could bring her inside. We already have a female cat that is 11 years old. Anyway this kitty, They thought for sure she was a stray but chances she became partially feral over time??. She is definitely very skittish and has never let me touch her yet. I've only gotten about 2 feet from her before (but then again I've only been feeding her at this point for about 5 weeks or so). Anyways, she tested negative for FIV/FELV and was already spayed (she had the green tattoo on lower belly already) so they vaccinated her and treated her for fleas and I was able to bring her home later that same day. I had a room already set up for her with a hiding place and beds and a cat tree and litter box. She ate the first night home but didn't use litter box for 2 whole days until I put grass from backyard into the litter box. Phew! so finally using litter box AND each day I felt like we'd make a little more progress: for instance she would come out of her hiding spot to eat her food while I cleaned her litter box, after dinner she would sit on a soft ottoman and stay there when I came into the room to quietly sit and read, then next day she even closed her eyes and seemed to nap while I was in the room. But then the next day I gave her dinner, cleaned litter box and left room for a bit, I watched her on the baby monitor I have set up and she ate, used the litter box, climbed up on cat tree to lounge there so then I went back in the room to hang out with her a bit and before sitting down I placed treats in her bowl. Within a minute she climbed down and ate the treats and sat on the floor looking at me. So this is where I messed up all our progress I thought I'll give her some more treats but I don't want to scare her by standing up and approaching her so I tossed a few on the ground in front of her and then she hissed and slunk into her hiding spot and did a low growl. I felt so awful!!! I left the room after a bit since she would not come out and went downstairs and cried. She thought I was trying to hurt her Since then (that was Monday night) she won't come out if I come in the room, no longer does she start eating while I'm cleaning litter box and if she is out she is on her cat tree up on the highest perch and she keeps her head down super low so that I can barely see her. I am sooooooo upset, I can't believe I was such an idiot!! I feel sick about this So now after I leave her food and clean litter box and watch on the monitor she won't come out for at least an hour in which time I'm sure she's just making sure I'm not coming back in the room. She does come out at night and she even played one night with a ball I'd left in there and she's active all night but then in morning when I know she knows I'm about to come in she either climbs up super high on cat tree or goes in her safe spot hiding from me. Have I ruined this bonding process for good? Is there hope? I've only had her inside now for one week exactly but with what started out pretty good with progress being made each day has gone backwards big time. Oh, I forgot to mention, they are guessing she is between 4 and 5 years old.

 

[maggiedemi]

I think she will forgive you, it just scared her. What bridged the distance between me and Demi, my former feral, is I petted him with a long handled duster. Once he saw that I could touch him without hurting him, he started to trust me. Other people on here have used a back scratcher or a sock taped to a stick, but I used the duster with the long handle.

 

[Kriskopop]

Thank you! I hope so, I'm just hoping she will come on the floor again when I'm nearby, I can't really get near her in the cabinet she uses as a hiding spot and I don't want to reach for her on the cat tree. I'm just afraid that if I reach for her in any way she will freak out. I'm guessing that I will have to be super patient and continue to go and sit quietly (or talk to her in a soothing voice) for quite awhile before she stops hiding from me. I definitely don't want to force the issue in any way and scare her further.

 

[Kieka]

She was just a little scared. A step back but she will overcome it.

The funny thing, for me at least, is my guys only will eat treats if I toss them. I throw them across the room, slide them along the floor, or just do a light toss to hit near them depending on mood. Most of the time I end up with cats sliding across the floor and pouncing on them with some pushing if I am not careful with rotation and direction to keep them in separate areas. My guys will even milk me for more by ignoring the treats so I throw a few more trying to get their attention before stopping; then they go around and hunt them down. But if I just put treats on the floor or in a bowl I get the nastiest looks because it isn't fun.

 

[Kriskopop]

I hope so, thank you for your response! I wonder if she was abused or if someone once threw rocks at her

 

[Kieka]

I hope so, thank you for your response! I wonder if she was abused or if someone once threw rocks at her

It could be just the sudden movement scared her; when I first brought in my feral just putting the food bowl down could cause a rapid retreat. If you were to start low tossing them regularly I bet it would become a game for her.

 

[Kriskopop]

Right, it's just that I've read once you lose trust with ferals/strays that it can be impossible to get back. And she is reacting/acting now like she does not trust me at all, like I actually physically hurt her and it breaks my heart. I'm not sure what to do, I'm not sure that if she is hiding in her cabinet/hiding place and I come in to sit there quietly that it's doing any good anymore?

 

[maggiedemi]

No way, my two former ferals get mad at me all the time. They always forgive me. She's just scared, she will come around.

 

[Kriskopop]

I hope you are right!! thank you

 

[Kieka]

My former feral has moments still (2.5 years later) when I startle or scare her. I just locked her in the closet a week ago (I didn’t realize she was in there). It’s a few cautious days then back to before. It might take a little longer but as long as you aren’t actually hurting them they will forgive and forget.

 

[Kriskopop]

Thank you

 

[Kriskopop]

Also another question, I had read that it's good for them to have a hiding spot so I have a low cabinet with sliding doors, I leave one side open and the other closed so she can sleep or hide out in there. BUT I also feel like if she's in there she can ignore me easier and I'm not sure if that's helping of hurting this process of her learning to trust me? Should I close the door instead so she cannot go in there? She can always climb up on the cat tree to feel safer. But she does seem to like to sleep in there where it's darker I think. Perhaps I can buy her a covered cat bed and she could use that instead? The cabinet is all wood and I don't want to put a blanket in there as it will probably get all tangled up so it can't be very comfy.

 

[maggiedemi]

I'm not sure. I did have to block off the back of the recliner, because Maggie kept hiding under it all day long and I couldn't get her out without the broom. And also because I didn't want her to get hurt if someone sat in the recliner. I think it's better for them to have shelves and cat trees to go on out in the open. I guess it all depends on how long she stays in there, you don't want her to spend her whole life in there and not get socialized.

 

[Kriskopop]

Yeah, that's what I was thinking. I think I'll give her until this weekend but then buy her a covered bed that she can use instead and close off the cabinet

 

[orange&white]

Ah, little scared kitty. She will get over the setback and you can progress forward again. I would try going into the room and tossing a few treats around (not directly in her direction but while she's watching), talk softly and upbeat "Yummy treats for kitty!", then get up and leave. Sounds like she was so scared the first time that by the time she came out later and ate the treats, she didn't associate the yummy treats with the "things" you "threw at her" (in her mind). Too much time lapsed. You want her to link the treats as good things, learn that tossing them is not scary, and mostly associate you with all good things. If you can get her to come out for treats quickly after you leave, then start tossing some treats and staying a minute or two to see if she'll come out with you there.

As for the cabinet, if it is accessible enough for you to get her out if you needed to, then I think it sounds like a fine hidey hole for a shy cat. You usually want to block access under or behind furniture in tight spots where you wouldn't be able to get the cat easily (or where the cat could get hurt...like Maggie mentioned under the recliner). An additional little cat cave bed would be a nice too, if you have floor space.

Are you playing a radio in her room 24/7? I played talk radio at low volume for my feral kitten for 2-3 months to get her used to a variety of human voices. Classical music is a good soothing choice too.

 

[Kriskopop]

Thank you Orange&White !! Great suggestions for sure! Yes, I think I will leave the cabinet but did order her a covered bed as well. I just started playing music for her yesterday 24/7, I've played music in the past but only when I was there. But just got a CD player and put it on repeat. The music seems to calm her, I bought a special CD just for cats It really seems to help. We did make some progress last night, she acted less frightened but of course was still very weary of me. But I'm feeling better about this all again and more hopeful