I need help.

[systematic]

So I think I'm going to have to put my cat down.

When we moved she started peeing on the carpet, just two weeks ago we got Nature's Miracle Enzyme spray and cleaned the areas. We also put attractants in her litter and she reacted well to it. She used her potty box every day for a week and a half. I was so happy. Now she is back to peeing again and it is taking it's toll on my human family, it is time for her to go as she has betrayed our trust.

I'm a complicated individual who has won a long fight with clinical depression partly in thanks to my furry friend. Today I caught her peeing on the carpet and for the first time in her seven years of life I yelled at her. I don't want my last memories of her to be like this.

My depression has returned over the past three days and I am already having suicidal thoughts. I can't deal with the stress of having her around, but I don't think I will be able to deal with the stress of losing her. I was a good kid with a bright future ahead of me. I'm afraid.

 

[peaches08]

Has she seen a vet for this? She could have a UTI, diabetes...stuff that can be treated.

 

[systematic]

I'm not going to waste money on a problem I know is behavioral. Either way, peeing outside the box is purely habitual for her now. I have failed her as an owner, and I can't handle that fact. This community has been good to me when I first came here for help. I want to thank you guys for that. But it's over. There is nothing I can do.

 

[peaches08]

OK. Well, it sounds as if you're determined to euthanize the cat. There are worse things than death.

I thought my old cat was doing it out of behavior too. Until the vet ran blood work on her and she had an over 450 blood glucose.

 

[goholistic]

Inappropriate elimination can oftentimes be fixed, but the first thing to do is rule out a medical issue. If all tests come out a-okay, then it's time to look at behavorial issues. She could be stressed from the move and still adjusting to her new environment. Cats can also sense stress and behavior changes in us.

At our pets' primary caregivers, it is our responsibility to help them through their crises. Our cats trust us to help them, not punish them or euthanize them for the behavior that comes natural to them or for any pain or discomfort that they may be feeling. They can't help it.

Your cat will be a good friend to you and be there for you through your depression as she has been in the past...no matter what. We can't always say the same for our human counterparts. I truly believe our felines are capable of love and DO love us. I hope you will give her a chance to be your sweet girl again. She needs your help and you need hers.  

   I'd hate to for you to make a terrible decision that you'll regret later and further intensify your depression.

By the way, what is your cat's name and how old is she?

 

[vball91]

I would second running a urinalysis at least. That test is not very expensive. You really can't know that it is behavioral until medical reasons have been ruled out.

 

[systematic]

I don't have the money for new carpeting. That is why my family is on a zero tolerance policy with her. On top of that, I can't be here to baby sit her and retrain her. It's not possible, I have school and work. This is a brand new house, we've closed her off to the outside world, I have literally done all the practical things to retrain her as laid out to me by my local ASPCA office.

But this thread wasn't supposed to be about her, I put it in a different forum because I need advice on me, not her. I yelled at her and mistreated her today in an act of despair. It was quick, but I yelled at her and kicked her (not literally) out of her room. I cornered her and yelled at her and I stopped myself short of hitting her. I then shortly considered abondoning her outise in the street.

For the past thirty minutes now I have thought about the horrible things I just did. I know it is not me to be that cruel but that doesn't change the fact that I did it. I freaking considered throwing her out of the house. I've been feeling suicidal and for the past thirty minutes I have been trying to convince myself not to do it. But I keep thinking about what I did and I now feel like I deserve to die.

For seven years she has been by my side, and although she has now betrayed my trust, she didn't deserve to be yelled at or chased into a corner. After I post this I am going to call the local police as I do own a rifle that has always been used for sport, but I fear I will turn it on myself tonight.

 

[vball91]

Please, please call someone for help now.

 

[peaches08]

She did not betray your trust. Please surrender the cat to the shelter and call the police.

 

[kookycats]

Please get some immediate help for yourself. Find a no-kill shelter and hopefully your cat can be placed.

Please help yourself.

 

[systematic]

So I have calmed down and my parents are home. They have come up with more ideas to retrain my cat. hopefully they will work, but at least I know that we are trying everything for my cat. I also have a friend who will be ale to take my cat if worst comes to worst. Although there is no guarantee she would be able to find kitty a new home and would have to shelter her.

I know I overreacted earlier and I am grateful to everyone here for trying to help. I think I may have turned everyone against me and I apologize.

My cat seems to have forgiven me as well, she is currently sleeping on my lap and cutting off all feelings to my legs as she is a fatty. Hahaha.

She knows her behavior is wrong and hopefully she will work on it just like we are. But if she doesn't, I understand it's because we failed her, and not the other way around.

I know I mentioned some bad stuff earlier and I promise I am a good person and kind to animals.

 

[ldg]

I'm so sorry this so emotionally difficult for you. I do hope you'll seek help for you. :heart2:

As to your kitty, the stress of the move could have caused an actual infection. Cats bladders are actually very sensitive to stress (the hormones the body releases as a reaction to stress), and our immune systems are affected by stress. It really is worth taking her to see the vet: she may benefit from anti-spasmodics, and she may actually be in pain.

Cats do not have a lot of ways to communicate with us. So a kitty that wasn't peeing out the box before that is now peeing out of the box is doing the only thing she can to say "there's a problem!" ...and it's not necessarily one of re-training.

If it is "just stress," she may benefit from using Feliway. She may benefit from using Flower Essences - something like Bach's Rescue Remedy.

...and is she peeing in the same places? It could well be that there was another cat in the home before you bought it, and she smells the other cat. So proper cleaning of the areas is essential. Nature's Miracle really isn't the best option. And "access denial" to the area(s) will also help. Aluminum foil just set down over the area while the affected area treated with an enzyme cleaner was left to dry naturally worked well for us. Others have found that they need to buy those mats with the spikes on them that are used for office chairs, and use a box cutter to cut pieces off of them to set over areas treated with an enzyme cleaner.

Here is an article on properly cleaning up cat urine - because it isn't as straightforward as just spraying the area where a kitty peed. http://www.thecatsite.com/a/how-to-remove-cat-urine

If she IS reacting to former kitty pee, it WILL take a number of applications of the enzyme cleaner. It's expensive, especially because of the shipping (it's only available online), but we use Nok Out.

:heart2:

 

[ldg]

Also... if worse comes to worst, there are medical options. You don't necessarily need to give her up or have her euthanized. When we were at our wit's end with Spooky (who developed a bladder infection when we moved, and then kept peeing outside the box), the vet suggested amitriptyline. This is an old-line human antidepressant, but it has an interesting side-effect: urine retention. It is used in children who wet their beds. On the amitriptyline, Spooky peed once a day, in the box. This gave us all a break, and the time we needed to properly clean the house. After about four months, we started weaning her off the medication, and the behavior problem did not return.

She has peed out of the box since, but we figured out she does it when she's in pain. She needed a dental, and had to have several teeth removed. Now we avoid the problem by getting her regular dentals.

So just putting that out there for your consideration. There often IS a reason for a cat to pee outside the box, apart from stress or territory marking, and it isn't necessarily a bladder infection. Thus a vet visit is always a good idea. :rub:

 

[systematic]

Thanks for the article, although I don't have any of the brands listed in it, I do still have tons of nature's miracle that I can probably use to soak the carpet with a few times. Also, this is a brand new house so there were no previous cats, but she is peeing in the same two spots (it used to be three, but we were able to get her to stop using one spot).

She is due to get shots in about a month, if I wait to have her get checked out for an infection until then, can that be bad for her? But if it is an infection, then she has had it for eight weeks already.

Thanks for the support.

 

[peaches08]

See if you can get her in earlier. You mentioned her being overweight...that plus inappropriate urination makes me think diabetes. Easy to treat, by the way.

 

[systematic]

Me calling her overweight was mostly out of jest, but I get your point. I'll see when I can get her an appointment, and then maybe she can get her shots then too.

 

[sugarsandz]

Hope this gets resolved for you both, I know how stressful it can be. My cat was doing this and it did turn out to be a health problem so you never know. If things don't improve though and you've done all you can then I'd at least try and rehome her instead of putting her down. People will on occasion take animals with behavior issues, I have a few animals that have had issues in this area and they are all doing fine.

Best of luck

 

[MoochNNoodles]

 

[peaches08]

Me calling her overweight was mostly out of jest, but I get your point. I'll see when I can get her an appointment, and then maybe she can get her shots then too.

Let us know how it goes.

My dear old Grey (RIP), did exactly what you're talking about. Leave a shirt on the floor, she peed on it. Corner of the closet, peed on shoes. And OMG if there was a stray grocery bag...peed on! I chased pee for years. She got ringworm (indoor only cat) but was otherwise healthy looking, the vet insisted on blood work and we found that she was diabetic. I felt horrible...she wasn't peeing outside of the box because of behavioral issues, she was sick! Long story made short, Indoor Weight Control kibble was killing my cat. High carbs caused her weight gain and diabetes. We corrected her diet and she used her box exclusively.

 

[angels mommy]

I agree with LDG & the others. Stress can cause UTI's. My kitty had one, & a couple of rounds with cystitis. If she does, yes, please try to get her to the vet's asap. She may need antibiotics & could be in pain.

Ask your parents for help. Show them this thread, so they can read the info.  I also hope you get some help too.