In my email tonight...had to share...
Subject: FW: How to get rid of Telemarketers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One thing that has always bugged me, and I’m sure it does most of you,
is to sit down at the dinner table only to be interrupted by a phone
call from a telemarketer. I decided, on one such occasion, to try to be
as irritating as they were to me. The call was from AT&T and it
went something like this:
(swallowing)
Me: Hello
AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T...
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes This is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: YES! This is AT&T, may I speak to Mr. Byron please?
Me: May I ask who is calling?
AT&T: This is AT&T.
Me: OK, hold on.
At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking
that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my
salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were
still waiting.
Me: Hello?
AT&T: Is this Mr. Byron?
Me: May I ask who is calling please? > AT&T:
Yes this is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes this is AT&T...
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, is this Mr. Byron?
Me: Yes, is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: The phone company?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: I thought you said this was AT&T.
AT&T: Yes sir, we are a phone company.
Me: I already have a phone.
AT&T: We aren’t selling phones today Mr. Byron.
Me: Well whatever it is, I’m really not
interested but thanks for calling.
When you are not interested in something, I don’t think you can
express yourself any plainer than by saying ”I’m really not
interested”, but this lady was persistent.
AT&T: Mr. Byron we would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24
hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
Now, I am sure she meant she was offering a ”rate” of 10 cents a
minute but she at no time used the word rate. I could clearly see
ciphering.
Me: Now, that’s 10 cents a minute 24 hours a day?
AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes sir
that’s right! 24 hours a day!
Me: 7 days a week?
AT&T: That’s right.
Me: 365 days a year?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! That’s amazing!
AT&T: We think so!
Me: That’s quite a sum of money!
AT&T: Yes sir, it’s amazing how it adds up.
Me: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one
at the end of the year for the full $52,560, and if you send an
annual check, can I get a cash advance?
AT&T: Excuse me?
Me: You know, the 10 cents a minute.
AT&T: What are you talking about?
Me: You said you’d give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days
a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1,008 per
week and $52,560 per year. I’m just interested in knowing how
you will be making payment.
AT&T: Oh no sir I didn’t mean we’d be paying you. You pay us 10
cents a minute.
Me: Wait a minute here!!! Didn’t you say you’d give me 10 cents a
minute. Are you sure this is AT&T?
AT&T: Well, yes this is AT&T sir but......
Me: But nothing, how do you figure that by saying that you’ll give
me 10 cents a minute that I’ll give you 10 cents a minute? Is this
some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I’ve read about
things like this in the Enquirer you know. Don’t use your alien
brainwashing techniques on me.
AT&T: No sir we are offering 10 cents a minute for.....
Me: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please!
AT&T: Sir I don’t think that is necessary.
Me: Sure! You say that now! What happens later?
AT&T: What?
Me: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!
AT&T: Yes Mr. Byron. Please hold.
So now AT&T has me on hold and my supper is getting cold. I begin to
eat while I’m waiting for a supervisor. After a wait of a few minutes
and while I have a mouth full of food:
Supervisor: Mr. Byron?
Me: Yeth?
Supervisor: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10
cents a minute program.
Me: Id thish Ath Teeth & Teeth?
Supervisor: Yes sir, it sure is.
I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do to
suppress my laughter and I had to be careful
not to produce a snort.
Me: No, actually I was just waiting for someone to get back to me so
that I could sign up for the plan.
Supervisor: OK, no problem, I’ll transfer you back to the person who
was helping you.
Me: Thank you.
I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I needed
to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite
voice at the other end of the phone.
AT&T: Hello Mr. Byron, I understand that you are interested in
signing up for our plan?
Me: Do you have that friends and family thing because you can never
have enough friends and I’m an only child and I’d really like to
have a little brother...
AT&T: (click)
Subject: FW: How to get rid of Telemarketers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One thing that has always bugged me, and I’m sure it does most of you,
is to sit down at the dinner table only to be interrupted by a phone
call from a telemarketer. I decided, on one such occasion, to try to be
as irritating as they were to me. The call was from AT&T and it
went something like this:
(swallowing)
Me: Hello
AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T...
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes This is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: YES! This is AT&T, may I speak to Mr. Byron please?
Me: May I ask who is calling?
AT&T: This is AT&T.
Me: OK, hold on.
At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking
that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my
salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were
still waiting.
Me: Hello?
AT&T: Is this Mr. Byron?
Me: May I ask who is calling please? > AT&T:
Yes this is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes this is AT&T...
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, is this Mr. Byron?
Me: Yes, is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: The phone company?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: I thought you said this was AT&T.
AT&T: Yes sir, we are a phone company.
Me: I already have a phone.
AT&T: We aren’t selling phones today Mr. Byron.
Me: Well whatever it is, I’m really not
interested but thanks for calling.
When you are not interested in something, I don’t think you can
express yourself any plainer than by saying ”I’m really not
interested”, but this lady was persistent.
AT&T: Mr. Byron we would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24
hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
Now, I am sure she meant she was offering a ”rate” of 10 cents a
minute but she at no time used the word rate. I could clearly see
ciphering.
Me: Now, that’s 10 cents a minute 24 hours a day?
AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes sir
that’s right! 24 hours a day!
Me: 7 days a week?
AT&T: That’s right.
Me: 365 days a year?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! That’s amazing!
AT&T: We think so!
Me: That’s quite a sum of money!
AT&T: Yes sir, it’s amazing how it adds up.
Me: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one
at the end of the year for the full $52,560, and if you send an
annual check, can I get a cash advance?
AT&T: Excuse me?
Me: You know, the 10 cents a minute.
AT&T: What are you talking about?
Me: You said you’d give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days
a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1,008 per
week and $52,560 per year. I’m just interested in knowing how
you will be making payment.
AT&T: Oh no sir I didn’t mean we’d be paying you. You pay us 10
cents a minute.
Me: Wait a minute here!!! Didn’t you say you’d give me 10 cents a
minute. Are you sure this is AT&T?
AT&T: Well, yes this is AT&T sir but......
Me: But nothing, how do you figure that by saying that you’ll give
me 10 cents a minute that I’ll give you 10 cents a minute? Is this
some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I’ve read about
things like this in the Enquirer you know. Don’t use your alien
brainwashing techniques on me.
AT&T: No sir we are offering 10 cents a minute for.....
Me: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please!
AT&T: Sir I don’t think that is necessary.
Me: Sure! You say that now! What happens later?
AT&T: What?
Me: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!
AT&T: Yes Mr. Byron. Please hold.
So now AT&T has me on hold and my supper is getting cold. I begin to
eat while I’m waiting for a supervisor. After a wait of a few minutes
and while I have a mouth full of food:
Supervisor: Mr. Byron?
Me: Yeth?
Supervisor: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10
cents a minute program.
Me: Id thish Ath Teeth & Teeth?
Supervisor: Yes sir, it sure is.
I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do to
suppress my laughter and I had to be careful
not to produce a snort.
Me: No, actually I was just waiting for someone to get back to me so
that I could sign up for the plan.
Supervisor: OK, no problem, I’ll transfer you back to the person who
was helping you.
Me: Thank you.
I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I needed
to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite
voice at the other end of the phone.
AT&T: Hello Mr. Byron, I understand that you are interested in
signing up for our plan?
Me: Do you have that friends and family thing because you can never
have enough friends and I’m an only child and I’d really like to
have a little brother...
AT&T: (click)
