Holidays always make me melancholy for little lost friends

trudy1

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so this will be as short as an old man can make it..stopping to cry a little every so often. ( ya, I know men don’t cry) anyway

The memories start way back living in Texas. On patrol one day and stopped by a boat launch to inspect it. Now I was never a (cat person). Heard this faint crying in the weeds. Pulling back the grass in humid, 100 degree weather and saw this puny little kitten. So picked him up and into patrol car. My house was close so thought to drop him off so wife and daughter could take him to a shelter. Well the house door opened, daughters hands reached out and he was gone! That was Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart or woofy for short. He’s been gone almost 20 years.

I retired and we moved to sw Missouri. By now the cat thing really had it’s claws in me. My wife’s brother had some old barn cats and , yes, kittens! We ended up with a feral colony of 8. All s/n which I drove up and fed every other day for 8 years! I would call “cat kids” at the top of my voice and they’d come running from everywhere. Meantime we’d acquired frisky and Oreo who came as kittens over our gate and up the 400 ft drive to our bedroom window. Those were the days of “cat love” as I had all the barn cats named, tamed and eager for brushing and treating the various sores all tnr cats get. Then dark days came with the announcement a house was to be built on the barn site and my little colony had to go. EVERY DAY for the last 7 years I can remember each of their faces as I loaded them into carriers to be given as barn cats by a local veterinarian friend to farmers. Pause The look of fear and “why” in their eyes. Raised and hand fed since birth they’d never hunted anything...just waited for my truck....

I was recovering from this and working in my garage when I looked up and dragging himself along the ground in the field next to my house was a long haired big male cat. He was able to climb the fence and right over to me. This was one I called “gentle “. A huge male, scars from many fights, and back legs barely working. Now it’s at least 1/4 mi across that field! He just came and sat next to me. Fleas and proglottids, but those eyes. Fed him the best meal he’d ever had and took him to the vet. But the news was not good. Pause Spinal damage so he was given drugs for pain steroid brought home. Gentle’s life was very short and I loaded him, in obvious pain, for that last trip to the vet.

Oreo died while I was on a wild land fire in Montana from mast cell. Frisky passed from urinary issues.

So many memories

Now I have molly, who came from the back of a UPS truck making a delivery. Gracie from the Chick-fil-A parking lot as a starving 8 oz kitten with matted eyes and Henry, a Hugh male who just “arrived” at our back door. When I complained to my vet about “didn’t need another cat” she looked me in the eye and said “but he needed you”

Oh and while this was all going on I found one source of the kittens. The farmers abandoned house just up the road. So got out the traps and s/n 15 babies and adults. But God was good as I placed 7 in great homes, left 6 of the adults as barn cats and, yep, kept morty, the bobtail, sweety a super calico and tigger, the guy nobody wanted because he was scared of his own shadow.

Wow, thanks. Feels good to write all this down. Sorry it’s so long but I needed this. You know I still cried though.
 

daftcat75

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I adopted Krista, who passed this summer, in the summer of 2006. It had only been a month since my cat before her, Cabbie (Cabernet), had to be put down because of an aggressive oral cancer. I had Cabbie since at least 2000 and maybe before that too. She was a friend's cat who became mine when he moved to a place that wouldn't take cats. So it's been about 20 years since I've had to go through the holidays and a winter without a feline companion. 😿

It will be awhile before I'm ready again. I never wanted to be "between cats". But I always thought I'd see my family again--they live 400 miles away and I couldn't leave Krista alone last year--and also do some traveling after Krista passed. 2020 (and looking like 2021 too) had other thoughts about this. 🤦‍♂️😷
 
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trudy1

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Interesting you said this. It’s always that quandary...having pets with no family or friends to step in when you want go on a trip. For me that’s a secret thought reserved for my quiet times. Nuf said.
 

les26

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Lord Bless you for taking care of all of these little creatures of His, you truly are an Angel on Earth to all of these little ones.

And yes men cry, I do it too and I find it to be a great stress relief, especially this year with Covid and me losing my job of 21 years and starting a new one 4 months ago, and this time of year ALWAYS hits the emotion button so much harder, so let the tears flow, REAL men DO cry, and I feel sorry for those who think that they can't or shouldn't, it makes you more of a man not less of one.....

They are all fine now and you will see them again one day and it will be wonderful...just picture yourself standing there and ALL of these cats around you rubbing against you and meowing and playing and basically saying "thank you for what you did for me on Earth"!

Well done sir......:)

Sylvester also approves and applauds you :clapcat:
 

ZombieTiger

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People that say real men don't cry are asshats, people that say "it's just a pet, care about other people instead" have serious issues, and people that think they get to tell others how to grieve can go to a special place.

Thank you for sharing. I hope you don't mind, but your post made me smile (I mean, apart from the sad things). You helped them, and some of them obviously helped you back.

I've grown up with dogs and other animals and have my first cat now, after 5 years of no animals of any kind around. I came to realise that while loosing them is friggin hard, it's oh so worth it.

Dude, Merry Christmas. :lol:

Interesting you said this. It’s always that quandary...having pets with no family or friends to step in when you want go on a trip. For me that’s a secret thought reserved for my quiet times. Nuf said.
You either take them with you or you don't go.
 
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daftcat75

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Another cat dad here. I had a soggy desk from August until November. Thank goodness for work-from-home. Four months on, I'm still a tender thought away from tears. 😿 Macho is stupid. That cat touched me deep 😻 and losing her tore me apart. 😭 Getting a little misty right now...
 
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Mamanyt1953

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Rescue is my favorite breed, and rescuers are my favorite people. Period. And about that "men don't cry" thing...the strongest, wisest men in my life all knew the value of tears, and the strength it takes to shed them.

I sometimes think that many violent men are actually terribly hurt men who will not allow themselves to cry...but that's a thought for another forum.
 

Jcatbird

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The bigger the warm heart, the more it hurts but who wants to live without a warm heart? The thing is..... with each cat you love, they take a piece of your heart. With each new cat that enters your life you are given a piece of their heart. For people who love enough and give enough, if they live long enough, their heart is entirely made up of the components of each cat they have known and they become as kind,wonderful and loving as a cat. There is nothing wrong with showing your heart. Our hearts go out to you and all others who have done the kind of rescues you have done. At least, maybe, you can find some comfort knowing that you are not alone in this. Thank you for all you have done and are doing. :alright: :grouphug2:
 

di and bob

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After seeing how mistreated and hated cats were by so many people so many years ago, I decided that I would do all I could to give a little comfort and love. After seeing my beloved little black 'Bear', only 8 weeks old, a stray from a neighborhood stray, get purposely run over in the street, it shattered my heart and my belief in the 'goodness' of humans.
So many over the years, so many regrets that I didn't do enough, or couldn't do, mainly because of money back then. But like my husband keeps telling me, "you can't save them all", but I like to think I can save what I can. Even after moving out here in the country, I already have 3 strays that have shown up, once again continuing the circle of cats that are and always will be a part of my life.
There will always be tears, memories that tear your heart out. But there are also memories of happy times, of the love and devotion you received and gave. Life is like that, a rollercoaster of ups and downs. Hopefully we learn from our mistakes and continue to open our hearts to the countless little ones that need us so very much. And, yes to cry for the ones we have lost because of our love for those sweet, trusting creatures we call cats.....
 
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trudy1

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Thanks to all for your responses. That’s what makes this forum so much a part of life. I’m old enough to remember those days before internet and the ability to share feelings like these. Face to face with family or even friends was something you never did!
Keep the faith
 
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