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- Nov 4, 2015
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Hello. My name is Hallie, and My cat's name is Marilyn. I apologize for such a long post, but I am really needing some advice. My husband is fed up with our cat. She is very sweet and affectionate towards me, but just me. He isn't willing to spend ANY money on her to let me take her to get any tests run to rule anything out, or get a diffuser, or get advice from a professional. We fight about her probably 2 to 4 times per week. He wants her gone, but I keep saying we are never getting rid of her, so why not try to help her, but he won't listen. I want to install cat shelves, but he absolutely won't hear of that.
We got Marilyn when she was 6 weeks old from an animal shelter. She was very affectionate and friendly to both my husband and I when we got her. They forced her to be spayed later that week, so at about 6 weeks old. she had a wonderful kitten hood, then when she got to maybe 8 months old, she started being very fearful towards both my husband and myself. She even scratched me in the face! About 6 months later, I managed to gain her trust, and now I am the only one she trusts. She loves to hide anywhere she can. She used to hide under the bed, so we got a new bed she can't hide under, so now she hides in the closet. If I lock her out of her bedroom suite she will find somewhere else to hide. As long as the house is quiet, she will come into the living room and relax a bit, especially if my husband is not home. She will let me carry her around (as long as it's in her comfort zone area), but as soon as we get to the living room, she panics and needs to run away and hide. We can trim her nails, but only if my husband wears practically bite proof gloves. We have tried lots of techniques with trimming her nails (I was a vet assistant for 2 years), but scruffing makes it worse for her.
My husband wants to be her friend, but every time he goes up to her, she growls, and runs away. Sometimes he is able to pet her if he crouches and it is in her closet, but practically the whole time she is vigorously purring and growling, but rubbing up against his hand at the same time.
She is also fearful of our other 2 cats. One is about a year older, and is a Maine Coon (about 15lbs), Marilyn weighs about 8 or 9 lbs (slightly overweight from constant hiding). He and she were thick as thieves, but around the same time she had the same problem with the other cat too (at that time the only other one). In her defense he liked to hold her down on her back and listen to her scream. Now they will eat beside each other, but he is always trying to play with her and she screams so loudly whenever he gets that playful look in his eye, it wakes our 9 month old baby. She has no problem with the baby, other than she doesn't want to be touched by her, but Marilyn just moves when she wants. Our new kitten (7 months) loves her, and goes into the closet to lay with her sometimes, but most of the time she hisses at him too. We baby sat a female cat a few times for about 2 weeks,and Marilyn would play with her.
She eats, drinks, and uses the litter box with no problems. Since the one time she scratched me, she has never shown any sign of aggression toward anyone. Even my husband. She is just so fearful. If i take her into a room with the door closed, just she and I, she can hardly play, because she is watching the door for other cats. She used to be a vigorous player, now not as much.
Vincent and Marilyn ( Marilyn about 4 or 5 months old) they were best friends. I wish it were still like this!
Thank you to anyone who read this. I would love to have less tension in the house. I feel like I am her only advocate and have to try everything possible. Thanks again!
Hallie
We got Marilyn when she was 6 weeks old from an animal shelter. She was very affectionate and friendly to both my husband and I when we got her. They forced her to be spayed later that week, so at about 6 weeks old. she had a wonderful kitten hood, then when she got to maybe 8 months old, she started being very fearful towards both my husband and myself. She even scratched me in the face! About 6 months later, I managed to gain her trust, and now I am the only one she trusts. She loves to hide anywhere she can. She used to hide under the bed, so we got a new bed she can't hide under, so now she hides in the closet. If I lock her out of her bedroom suite she will find somewhere else to hide. As long as the house is quiet, she will come into the living room and relax a bit, especially if my husband is not home. She will let me carry her around (as long as it's in her comfort zone area), but as soon as we get to the living room, she panics and needs to run away and hide. We can trim her nails, but only if my husband wears practically bite proof gloves. We have tried lots of techniques with trimming her nails (I was a vet assistant for 2 years), but scruffing makes it worse for her.
My husband wants to be her friend, but every time he goes up to her, she growls, and runs away. Sometimes he is able to pet her if he crouches and it is in her closet, but practically the whole time she is vigorously purring and growling, but rubbing up against his hand at the same time.
She is also fearful of our other 2 cats. One is about a year older, and is a Maine Coon (about 15lbs), Marilyn weighs about 8 or 9 lbs (slightly overweight from constant hiding). He and she were thick as thieves, but around the same time she had the same problem with the other cat too (at that time the only other one). In her defense he liked to hold her down on her back and listen to her scream. Now they will eat beside each other, but he is always trying to play with her and she screams so loudly whenever he gets that playful look in his eye, it wakes our 9 month old baby. She has no problem with the baby, other than she doesn't want to be touched by her, but Marilyn just moves when she wants. Our new kitten (7 months) loves her, and goes into the closet to lay with her sometimes, but most of the time she hisses at him too. We baby sat a female cat a few times for about 2 weeks,and Marilyn would play with her.
She eats, drinks, and uses the litter box with no problems. Since the one time she scratched me, she has never shown any sign of aggression toward anyone. Even my husband. She is just so fearful. If i take her into a room with the door closed, just she and I, she can hardly play, because she is watching the door for other cats. She used to be a vigorous player, now not as much.
Vincent and Marilyn ( Marilyn about 4 or 5 months old) they were best friends. I wish it were still like this!
Thank you to anyone who read this. I would love to have less tension in the house. I feel like I am her only advocate and have to try everything possible. Thanks again!
Hallie
) He can sit, and walk on a leash, and isn't afraid of much. He is very social and loves my husband, so he is always comparing Marilyn to him. My Kitten (7 months) is acting fearful of my husband a little now too, which he contributes to her freaking out around him. I keep telling him to do the feeding when he is home (we keep the kitten food put up, but give it to him whenever he wants) and hold him whenever he sees him, that's what I do, and he sleeps next to me most nights. 
