Help I need to get scared/aggressive cat into carrier

[mservant]

What a sense of relief I feel for you.  Well done!  Sticking with Sissy and caring for her enough to do what you did in order to return her to the shelter took great patience and courage, far more than many others would even dream of.  If I was you in that car driving home I would have been 'howling' with tears too.  Good for you letting it all out.

I really hope you do hear from them about what health issues she has had going on, and how her treatment goes.  From my experience with Snowleopard she was a completely different cat when she wasn't well and behaved very much like Sissy, and yet at any other time she was the most gentle cat you could ever wish for, even wonderful with tiny children and toddlers - even if they hit her or went through mean stages.   Lots of good vibes that Sissy gets well and you hear from the shelter about going to see her once she is.  

 

 

[maureen brad]

Thanks again. I will wait until Saturday and then I will just go in and see what is up. I need a few days to decompress. I am touched at everyone's kind words because there is a large part of me that feels like I walked away from my baby. I hope she gets good care.I hope that if I can't have her that careful consideration should be given if she is adopted out again. She ideally should be adopted out with another of her cat friends. She visibly comes to life and shows joy in the company of other cats.

 Tonight I am going to lay around and eat comfort food.I promise I will let everyone know what happens with Sissy. I won't pester the shelter but I do need to know. I was somewhat surprised that I had to sign her away before I could speak with the vet but that is that. Thanks again everyone.I hope I never deal with this situation again, I feel 100 years old.

 

[mservant]

You have not walked away from your baby, you have put her interests first and taken the best possible care of her, and put your own health at risk in so doing because you cared so much.  You deserve your comfort food and quiet time relaxing, and some big hugs too.  

 

[Columbine]

You have not walked away from your baby, you have put her interests first and taken the best possible care of her, and put your own health at risk in so doing because you cared so much.  You deserve your comfort food and quiet time relaxing, and some big hugs too.  :grphug2:

x 100. You did all that could have been expected of you and way more.

 

[maureen brad]

I did not hear from the rescue so, I drove up there a few hours ago. I was able to talk with a tech . She told me Sissy was fine, did not require treatment, was back in her room. The tech said two ther things, 1. I should have realized Sissy was NOT an affectionate cat. When I first met Sissy she solicitated pets from me. I did think she was more play than people focused but, here in my home she was very affectionate when she was not being picked up.

2. That I had signed her over and could not have her back.

I tried to tell her that my intention was not to sign Sissy over. I got a glazed look for that.

I went back to Sissy's room. There she was , I went in and that non-affectionate cat melted like butter in my hands. She seemed sad and her eyes were still very red. She was also still shaking her head like she has ear mites.

I pet her for a long time. I noticed that when my hand ran the length of her body if it touched her back end she became vocal and would jump up and away.

I was so heartbroken. I left the room and sat in the chairs nearby and watched her. She is limping.

 A volunteer I know reported that for me but in the time I was there none came and looked at her. She is kind of lethargic and not playing. I was surprised that she was not snuggling up with her cat friends. I saw her sniff at food but not eat.

This is awful. I should have kept her and taken her to the cat hospital here. I could have had her boarded and treated. i should have just charged it.

Why do things this way?

Why deny her the chance of a home for life?

I now cannot take her back and they obviously aren't going to treat her.

What chance does she have? Someone else may come along and adopt her but, she is going to tear them apart too. It isn't her fault and the next people who take her may have her put down.

I found a volunteer who has known her since she arrived so long ago. She told me that yes, Sissy has been handled and while feisty has always been very affectionate. Though she does love cats over people. So what? I like that because she was also so friendly to me.

This volunteer asked for my phone number. I hope she calls me , she said she may be able to find out what is going on.

I may do something I have never done and take this to social media.I admire any person who tries to help animals but there is no excuse for this. They basically insinuated that despite my obvious wounds it was just me, I was , what? What was I? I have no clue. I am just sad beyond words , regretful and mad.

Certainly, they have lost my future goodwill and support. I read a Yelp review of this group posted yesterday. While they had no time to help a cat they have had for 2 years they had tons of time to help someone trap her cat that did not come from them.

No time for Sissy.

When I first took her the vet handed me a tube of Terramycin and I told her I had thought Sissy just needed Lysine. That vet looked at me like I was clown and in a condescending voice informed me that Lysine would certainly not help what she called "red eye" like I was a fool. Now, they are telling me that her eye problems are nothing. Well, that nothing has spread.People ( and Yelp) tell me that this vet is bipolar and has wild mood swings. When I adopted Milo last year she was so nice. I should have read her yelp reviews....

 That poor little girl.

 I am beside myself and I do not understand .

I will let you know if the volunteer does call me .

I just cannot understand why they could not work with me to see Sissy well and in a home. It seems spiteful and certainly not in the interest of the cat.

I had presumed they existed to help cats.

 

[mingking]

I am so sorry to hear how they are treating Sissy back at the shelter. I think if I were in your shoes, I would take this to social media too. Take pictures of Sissy and her condition, write notes, and again, talk to that vet to see what is going on. They may give you attitude and be rude but that's something that you may have to swallow hard to get the attention and care Sissy needs. 

I think what you have done so far is admirable and good. I don't think you made a mistake giving Sissy back to the shelter. They  had assured you it was fine and that you could have Sissy back once she was better. And again, they  were the ones who went back on their word. And they  are the ones with all the inconsistencies and obvious lack of attention in regards to Sissy. 

 

[stewball]

It sounds like the handover went as well as can be expected. I just hope you get some answers over the coming days and weeks.

No one should have to go through what you went through with Sissy. None of it was your fault. You went above and beyond for that little cat. I'm just hoping for a happy ending for you both.

And no kitty should have had to have gone through what sissie went through.
I'm not talking about you Maureen, I'm talking about this wretched shelter and the fact that they don't socialise the kitties.
An article about what you suffered from beginning to end should be posted on Facebook. Maybe that would get this place working properly. Cheer up. The whole of TCS is with you.

 

[maureen brad]

Mingking- I tried several times over the past few weeks to contact the vet. She never called me. Weeks ago she had a tech call and ask me to bring Sissy in to have her eyes checked. That was the first time Sissy tore into me ( I think) I then backed off and waited...that didn't go well. That was when I started begging them for help in getting her to the vet.I called those people all the time. They would say they would call me back but didn't. I always had to call them. Earlier in the week I finally went there to speak to them in person.

Stewball- The shelter did socialize her. It is obvious to me that she is in some kind of pain. I do trust the volunteers that I know there.

I am going to wait 2 days, hopefully I will find out something from the lady who asked for me number.

I made mistakes all the way down the line but I meant well. I should have known not to sign the form when I brought her in. Dang it.I will carry the image of that poor sad cat, the way she was so obviously relieved to have me there petting her. I would have felt better to have seen her playing with the other cats. I worry as to why she is limping.

I have a couple ideas of what to do but, once again I am going to wait a couple days.

 I think the communication end of the way that rescue is run is just awful.I am going to hope for the best but, I am not going to let it end with that cat needing care.

 

[mservant]

What a sad update.  How awful for you to see her like that and now appearing to have even more health issues.  I will hope the first tech' you spoke with was mis-informed, esp about no need for treatment, and that this other volunteer does get back in touch with further information for you.  

Sometimes a little time letting thoughts settle is useful, and then if you do feel a need to take up questions and find out more about the care of this cat you will be able to do so in a clear and powerful manner which the shelter feel a need to answer.  

Your caring connection with this little cat shines out of your posts and it is hard to read your experiences with the shelter.  Heart breaking to have the images you give us of Sissy now.  Keep us updated with what you do and what you learn about her situation.  Stewball is right, feel the positive energy of TCS behind you, and take strength from how others too believe cats should be cared for. 

 

[maureen brad]

MServant- I suddenly remembered a few minutes ago that on one occasion at the shelter ( before I adopted her) she snarled at me when I touched her back end.I had forgotten about that. She was not limping here.I hope she didn't get hurt when I got her in the crate. There was no struggle involved, she just walked right in. can't for the life of me figure out why they just plunked her back in the room. They have 2 medical wards there.

I still think, they have a fatal communications problem.Certainly, they have just seen fit to disregard my concern and how injured I was. Given that she has red eyes and is limping could they have looked at her much after I brought her back?

I just do not know.

I should not have trusted them, I honestly thought they would take care of her. No matter what has happened it was hard for me to think badly of them. I was so invested in what they were doing.I should have read there yelp reviews. Most are good but many point to similar problems with communication and rudeness.One even warned that once you get a cat there go straight away to your own vet because you will not find much help through them.

Keep fingers crossed for Sissy. I do not want to go to social media. I own a business and I would hate that. Then again, I would not be treating anyone this way.

The shelter has made it pretty clear in the manner they have dealt with me that they have to interest in dealing with problems. So short sighted of them not to work to facilitate a life long adoption. So sad.

 

[Columbine]

Words fail me. I just cannot believe how badly the shelter is failing both you and Sissy. Social media might be a good course of action. I'd just want to be sure that it wouldn't somehow backfire and negatively impact Sissy's care. I'd normally never have that kind of reservation, but given all I've heard it could be a possibility.

My heart goes out to you both. Neither of you should ever have been in this position. IMO, it's irrelevant whether the shelter vet is bipolar or not. There's such a thing as professionalism.

I'm so sorry this has happened. I still hope and pray for a happy resolution for you both - together or apart.

 

[maureen brad]

Thank you Columbine- I have the same reservations. I wish I had kept her. I thought they would treat her. This was a huge mistake and she is paying the price. To see her so sad.I can't even find comfort in thinking she is back home.Every cat knows when she has been given away. I should not have signed that form. I still have no idea what happened and why they didn't even talk to me.I made it very clear that I wanted this cat, that I wanted to know what was wrong.Just over a week ago the vet was more than happy to see her, treat her and return her to me. I just couldn't get her in the carrier.

There seems to have been a breakdown I communication. I am at a loss over what to do . They have not been easy to communicate with. I am not sure there is anything I can do. I am however, going back there on Monday.

I had not even realized that she had become 'mine' in my heart.I should have just done something differently.

 

[Columbine]

Don't blame yourself. This whole mess was the shelter's doing. You were left with very little choice in the circumstances. It could still come right. I really hope the shelter wastes up and acts decently soon. You have to keep hope alive.

 

[mservant]

Don't blame yourself. This whole mess was the shelter's doing. You were left with very little choice in the circumstances. It could still come right. I really hope the shelter wastes up and acts decently soon. You have to keep hope alive.

 

[nansiludie]

Wow, I'm sorry this has turned out like this. You've done no wrong, please don't blame yourself. That shelter/rescue really needs to get on the ball. I know you miss her. Do you have a local Humane Society or is this it? If so, consider filing a complaint about the way they treated you and the lack of treatment for Sissy. I'm worried about her. I'm hoping they didn't hurt her, I don't think they would but its strange for her to be limping and being with the other cats, none of whom know her and still mites and eye issues.  Maybe they'll let you visit her, but for now keep trying to get ahold of the Vet, if you can't, then they might not leave any other choice than to file a complaint. Please keep us posted on how it goes.

 

[catladylou]

Hello I have the same problem with my older boy Romeo and hiss big sister princess. It's like they know they are going to the vets cuz that's the only time they come out. I have now started to put the carrier in there safe room about a week before they need it so they get used to going in and out off it. I must admit it don't always work but it's wroth a try. Hope this helps . Good luck :nod:

 

[bonepicker]

FHicat- thank you for your response

She has not yet met my vet. That appointment is on Thursday.
Because she comes from a sanctuary that is run by a vet the first two weeks of vet care is covered there. The vet wanted to see her because the eye infection was only in the right eye two weeks ago and is spread to the left. I called the office after what happened today to tell them I could not get in her to them today. I called again and asked for advice. They said they would call me back and did not do that.
 She had been letting me medicate her eyes but no more.
 I have had Feliway plug-in in the room since I brought her home ( I always use them) I also have a CD I keep going , it is calming classical music for cats.
I have composure treats , she will not eat them and so I use composure liquid in her wet food.
 I read that I can crush a quarter tablet of benydryl and put it in her food. I will see how that goes tomorrow.
The vet at the sanctuary will not be back until Friday.
I am upset with the sanctuary staff. They are quite a distance to travel but I went there because you can visist with the cats as mmuch as you need to and because of the two week trail  period.
 If this was a regular shelter(kill) it would not matter if she ripped me to shreds, I would not ever take her back.
 I am in shock at how hard she is to handle. At the sanctuary she was friendly, very calm and confident. I can honestly say she was the funniest cat I have ever watched in action. Because they do not let you pick up the cats it never registered with me that there was a chance that she had been handled very little in her 2 years there and so- I end up with this situation. Ugh.Feliway has always worked so well for me. I wonder if she would be more aggressive without it. Ha- ha.

Ah, wish me luck.

. My former feral still bites me UNLESS I have his wet food in my hand. At feeding time I can kiss him or hug him or rub his tummy. Try it, see if it works.

 

[maureen brad]

Bonepicker & Catlady lou- Thank you for the advice but I don't havethe cat anymore.

I seriously doubt the shelter would hurt her. I really don't believe that. I kind of wonder if she was accidently hurt when they tried to examine her.

Nan- We have tons and tons of shelters here. I just really liked this one because they run away no cat. I also love that they are in big open rooms. When you go in you are welcome to go from room to room and play with /pet the cats. You can stay as long as you like. This way you can really get a feel for the personality of the cat.At many other shelters you can only see cats out the windows and if you want to meet them you have to fill out a form , and then you get to meet maybe 3 cats for a few minutes.That makes it harder. I took weeks and weeks before I picked Sissy.

I try so hard to make a good match for the cat, my cats and my family. This is just an unfortuate thing. If Sissy had not been sick I would have been able to give her a long time of getting used to her new life before attempting to pick her up.

Catladylou- By the way , I had the carrier in her room open, for 3 weeks , still didn't work.

Columbine & Mservant- wise advise as always. I have given up in trying to communicate with these people.I am just going to keep going in and visiting Sissy and see what goes on.I am tempted to offer them money, maybe that would help things. I am not loaded with money though....

 

[mservant]

Continuing to visit Sissy sounds like a positive plan to me for lots of reasons.  

First, you get to see Sissy and check on how she is doing. 

Second, you can continue to have a bond with Sissy and offer her personal contact and a caring touch.

Third, if someone is showing interest in a cat it will be harder for the shelter to ignore any health issues, even if the staff / volunteers don't report issues you can do so when you have been there.

Fourth, if Sissy continues to be receptive to your physical presence and contact the shelter can hardly say she is not a socialized and loving cat you could not offer a home to.

Fifth,  you get so meet different members of the staff / volunteers when you go different days and times so potential to build positive relationship and exchange information with those who seem more receptive.

Sixth, you can observe more of how they are caring for Sissy and the other cats there.  Should you feel the need to complain about their cat care, attitudes, systems / communication or lack of it, or their handling of your situation then you will have even stronger information with which to do this.

Most of all, if you continue to feel a strong bond with Sissy and think she would welcome another opportunity to move in to your home once well, you will be in a good position to take this forward.

Personally I wouldn't offer them money unless you can see that what they are doing is getting Sissy well.  

Take good care of your self, and make the most of the fur-therapy you continue to have in your home to give you strength in this ongoing emotional roller coaster you are traveling on.  

 

 

[Columbine]

I don't think I can put it any better than mservant has. I don't think money is the issue, and if it is, then offering more money could so easily lead to them sending Sissy home with you while still needing treatment/meds again. The last thing either of you need is a repeat of this experience.

You never know - if you do keep going in to see Sissy you might, eventually, get to the bottom of why things happened as they did this time.

Stay strong, look after yourself and be kind to yourself too. Forget any notion of failure - you have no blame in any of this. Let your other cats comfort you in this difficult time. You can and will get through this