Hello everyone I need help and suggestions for my cat (she's hard for others)

[naaaaamiii]

  firstly, I'm new to this and sorry for not looking deep into the forums to ask about this.

so hello :3

look I'll admit I'm not very proud of how my cat has become. she can't socialize with other cats or humans. which worries me a lot. my cat was adopted. brought to me by a friend after a personal incident in my life involving depression. before my cat I adopted a dog I called Nadja but her arrival was too late for me and I couldn't save her. she died next to me and I got worse on my depression. so a former friend suggested a cat since they can handle themselves pretty well when it comes to bathroom breaks and eating. lol and that they would be okay if I would go to work. one day he found a cat at the university and called me to say he had a surprise. he brought her  and bough cat litter and box, food, a cat bottle for nurturing and some toys. I was happy but when he came over he didn't treat my cat very well since she's a bit rough on play. she bites a lot. and he's a dog person who has 4 pit-bulls.   

 I'm not good at disciplining my pets. can't raise my hand or voice on them. my cat can't be taken out of her habitat. I stayed at a friends house and since I didn't have anyone to take care of her. I had no choice but to bring her with me. but it was then my cat got really aggressive as if she didn't know me and attacked me with all her mite. she once scratched my right arm and bit through one of my fingers. she was very violent and I had to walk away and lay down on the floor. weirdly my cat came to her senses. layed on my chest and gave me a kiss  (nose on my nose). I was confused. but I couldn't  pet her or anything. my brother came over and took her to my place and told me that she was happy running inside her room and was acting normal.

now here's the problem. I finally got all the money to get her spade after almost 3 years of having her as a family member. when friends visited me she would act like a guarding dog on the window hissing and growling. when she's angry she's blinded and even attacks me if I try to calm her down. problem is I don't know what to do about getting her spade. she really needs it and I need it because her calling makes me lose sleep and try my best to keep her calmed down. where I live there are no vets that come to houses.

any suggestions?  I really need some lol

 

[tammyp]

I think you nailed it when you said your friend was rough in play and had 4 dogs...so didn't understand cats.  Now, I grew up with cats, but I was astonished at how much I didn't know about cat psychology, and how much the 'dog model' had affected me without realising it.  I think this is also true for you.  

Unlike dogs, very few cats are happy to 'go with the pack leader' on excursions (they don't even do 'pack leader'!).  So keeping her happy in her own environment is what you will need to do.  There are some cats that can travel, but usually, they are conditioned to this with training, and must also have the nature to be able to cope with new circumstances.  They are, by nature and nurture, confident and secure cats.

And this it he key for the other aspects of your situation.  Your cat has acted in all those ways because she is insecure...or down right terrified.  It's time to learn some cat!  This is the blog I read and read and read.  It has such incredible wisdom in it.  http://www.wayofcats.com/blog/   Her cat 911 e-book is a quick way of systematically learning cat and is affordable http://www.amazon.com.au/Cat-911-Fixing-their-Learn-ebook/dp/B002E19MUW, or you can spend lots of time reading the blog for free.  You will even find out the answer as to why your cat stopped her terrified attack on you when you lay down on the ground!  And by the way, it is good you can't 'dsicipline' with raising a hand or voice - this will do harm to cats, and not achieve your objective.  Cat's can be trained with love - that blog will show you so much about how to do this.

Now, spaying.  Yes.  You need to do this asap.  Why don't you call your vet if your cat is terribly afraid of travel, and explain that and ask their advice?  In some cases, they can give a sedative (mind you, these are extreme cases!).  If you can get her in a travel cage and to the vet, even if she is upset (not raging tornado upset), then this is ok.  I would spray the travel cage with feliway first, and put a t-shirt you have exercised in, within, as both these scents will be reassuring for her. Explain gently and lovingly that she will come back to you and she will feel much better, and be calm and serene yourself to reassure her there is nothing to be afraid of.

If you don't know WHERE to get her spayed, I don't think I can help (being on the other side of the world).  As a first port of call, I'd google vets, and/or low cost spay/neuter clinics.

Best wishes!

 

[tammyp]

Oh, and put the travel cage out for a few days as part of your furniture so it is nothing to be feared.  My cats like to jump in theirs and have a nap in there!  This is a good thing.  You can put a towel in it for cosiness, play with her in/on/near it, and give treats in it.  For use, I also made some 'curtains' for the front of the cage so I can block out the scary outside and increase the calmness inside.

 

[naaaaamiii]

tammyp, thank you so much for suggestion and pointed guidance.  I will try doing as suggested and take her to the vet if it doesn't go well. I will need to convince someone to come over. 

I guess my cat is insecure because of me. lol I am also insecure and been a bit overprotective over her. truly I adore my cat (nami) because as we know cats can be quite picky and if they care for you it feels rewarding.

once again thank you for your help <3 <3 <3 !

 

[tammyp]

Oh, you're welcome! Cats are the best, and such good medicine too

Things will be easier also once spayed.