He is no longer happy with me after the two times I trimmed his nails

[thatfilmgirl]

When I rescued the very, very sweet tuxedo cat, it was love at first sight. I spent the whole day in the room we had him quarantined in where I would wake up to find him rubbing his head against mine, kissing my face and just *loooove*. He adored being held by me. He was my cuddly companion.

But then he was allowed to leave the room and work on making friends with Sammy (pictured). It was slow but Poe was persistent. He became more adventurous and excited and now is very comfortable in our home. But that also meant he stopped rubbing and loving and cuddling with me!

However:

I trimmed his nails once, sitting on my bed with him mewling in a towel and then gave him plenty of treats but after that he didn't want to come up on my bed and cuddle me in the morning. The second time I trimmed his nails, on my bed, him wrapped in a towel looking at me so betrayed and fearful that he had to be wrapped in a towel and oh my goodness I am horrible! Then he got plenty of treats and he loves me but now won't come near my bed. He stopped rubbing his face against mine even before I trimmed his nails.

So I know at this point he probably associates the bed with unpleasant nail trimming (I have trimmed rattie nails and ferret nails, I do know how to trim them) so I guess the question is how do I earn his trust back? I'm dishing out $14 to the vet for them to trim his nails since I no longer want him to associate that whole thing with me.

How do I make my furry friend love and trust and cuddle me again? Why did he stop? Am I really so terrible when I trimmed his nails?

 

[calicosrspecial]

Please do not be too hard on yourself.

Often times when a cat comes in the house for the first time they look for a "protector". Someone that takes care of them, feeds them, keeps them safe, etc. Then as they get more confident and get a cat buddy (formerly viewed as a potential threat and now is a friend) they can sometimes be less affectionate to the protector. That might have happened. It is a very common thing that happens.

Also, the nail trimming can be a little unpleasant for a cat. Anytime there is something unpleasant they can associate that area/person etc with something unpleasant (that is why when we introduce cats we always try to associate with positive things like food).

So I would do a couple of things. Step up play with him especially near the bed but also all over. Have the toy act like prey (a mouse, a bird). After a good play session feed either treats or a meal. This builds confidence by replicating what they were put on earth to do - Hunt, Capture, Kill, Eat. If possible add a scratching post near the bed or maybe even a cat tree or cat shelving (height builds confidence). Finally just be calm and confident around him and give him love. Cats take on our emotions so the more calm and confident and loving we are the more they are. Use food to build that trust and love (I use warm chicken thigh meat) but treats and wet food anything they like is good to build trust. Give him eyes kisses to build trust. Close your eyes slowly to him and have them closed for 4 or 5 seconds then slowly open. And finally if you can get him to purr without putting yourself at risk of being hurt (bitten, scratched). Let him initiate the love, never force affection on him.

Cats are resilient and he will definitely respond to your love. Just give it time. 

I hope this helps. Please feel free to ask anything anytime. Please do not be hard on yourself, you are a loving cat owner and I guarantee he appreciates it.