He cut her sideways eyelid...

[mermaidkitten]

So my first cat sliced the new kitten's 2nd...or 3rd eyelide..the one that is thick and shuts sideways. I had to take her to the vet and the vet had to snip most of the hanging bit off and she's going to have to get the eyelid completely removed while she's getting spayed. I have not been correcting him when he hisses and corrects her physically bc I've read on here to let the resident cat show the new kitten he's the boss. But since this happened yesterday I've been been correcting him when he hisses at her and smacks her...They've played once since then but he's also smacked her once again since then....It's partially my fault for not keeping better track of his nails being trimmed but still..what can i do to make sure she doesn't get hurt again? I feel so terrible that she has to live without that extra eyelid for the rest of her life.

 

[sapphire75]

I suggest using a spray bottle instead of smacking/hitting. Don't get me wrong I am not against spanking animals but I noticed with Reese when I would swat him, he almost took it as a challenge and would come leaping back at me ready to fight (play fight).

A spray bottle works better because it is a surprise to him and then he takes time to stop and bathe all the wet places...by the time he gets done bathing he is on to something else.

 

[sapphire75]

One more thing....be sure you don't spray right in the eyes or ears as it can cause infections. Now, with Reese, he LOVES to play in the water. He will provoke me into spraying him. So, if it is a severe no no then I spray on top of his head. He doesn't seem to like it there so, he stops faster.

 

[mermaidkitten]

I've never popped them. I only yell NO and remove them from the situation. So when I hear him hissing at her I go "Noo!" and may nudge him if he's right next to me but very lightly. I also read on here that you shouldn't use spray bottles though, that it only causes a fear of water and doesn't really teach them.  I'm at a loss of what to do though...

 

[mermaidkitten]

He just popped her two separate times in the span of five minutes right in front of me. I feel like he's trying to get her out of his way of me but he needs to learn to cohabitate!! She doesn't fight back at all but she is s tiny bit of an instigator sometimes with staring and creeping but that usually ends up in play. These past two times he's just coming up behind her and attacking her!!

 

[NewYork1303]

When were these two introduced and how? I think a reintroduction might be in order. He shouldn't be hurting her. 

 

[sapphire75]

I don't mean this to sound as ugly as it is probably going to come out, I really do not!!

But, what is wrong with them having fear of water? Unless you regularly bathe them? Being afraid of water is better than being afraid of hands. And I mean that in generality cause I know you said you don't hit them.

 

[mani]

To be honest, negative punishment just does not work with cats.  It really is counter-productive.  Hitting them is a huge no-no and spraying with water is inadvisable.

Here's an article we have on why it's not a good idea to discipline cats   - it's well worth a read.

I think NewYork1303's advice could be the way to go.  You can always reintroduce when all else fails.  How long have you had them and how old are they?

 

[mermaidkitten]

When were these two introduced and how? I think a reintroduction might be in order. He shouldn't be hurting her. 

About two months ago I think. We found the kitten and took her in but kept her quarantined in a spare bedroom for about two or so weeks. Then we introduced through a play pen gate. It was all very slow. He wouldn't even be in the same room as her and hissed at her if she looked in his general direction. The last few weeks though they've been playing and eating together and he calls out to her so she'll come keep him company in other rooms. Could he just be having a bad few days?

I don't mean this to sound as ugly as it is probably going to come out, I really do not!!

But, what is wrong with them having fear of water? Unless you regularly bathe them? Being afraid of water is better than being afraid of hands. And I mean that in generality cause I know you said you don't hit them.

You don't sound rude at all don't worry. I guess it is better than them hurting each other or having real physical discipline. I am inclined to not just from reading not to do it on the Internet and I'm also a groomer. While they don't get bathed regularly I guess it just gives me a weird feeling...idk I will explore options as I'm very bonded to both my cats and really don't want to rehome the kitten.

To be honest, negative punishment just does not work with cats.  It really is counter-productive.  Hitting them is a huge no-no and spraying with water is inadvisable.
Here's an article we have on why it's not a good idea to discipline cats  - it's well worth a read.

I think NewYork1303's advice could be the way to go.  You can always reintroduce when all else fails.  How long have you had them and how old are they?

The male is probably 7 or 8 now. We've had him for a little under three years. The kitten was born sometime in mid May and we've had her for a couple of months. She was a stray who was hiding in cars at the pet store I work at. I am about to move in a few weeks. Could there possibly be something I can do in a new territory that could help?

 

[mani]

The male is probably 7 or 8 now. We've had him for a little under three years. The kitten was born sometime in mid May and we've had her for a couple of months. She was a stray who was hiding in cars at the pet store I work at. I am about to move in a few weeks. Could there possibly be something I can do in a new territory that could help?

I'd definitely do another slow introduction when you get there.  You may like to try some Feliway too as it could help both of them feel more settled in the new environment.

It may even be that putting them in a new place will put them on an even-footing, but that may just be wishful thinking on my part.

Here's the definitive introducing cats article

 

[NewYork1303]

I definitely would try reintroducing. I know its a hassle keeping the kitten in one room but hopefully feliway and another introduction can help. Some cats take several months or longer to be with each other happily. The cat should not be around the kitten if he is hissing or acting at all aggressive. This indicates that he is still not comfortable with her in his space. Also if the kitten has not been spayed the cat may be reacting to her hormones. Is the cat neutered? He may find her hormones threatening. How old is the kitten and when is she being spayed.

 

[mermaidkitten]

I'd definitely do another slow introduction when you get there.  You may like to try some Feliway too as it could help both of them feel more settled in the new environment.
It may even be that putting them in a new place will put them on an even-footing, but that may just be wishful thinking on my part.

Here's the definitive introducing cats article

Thanks for the links. I will look into the scent. And look over the link when I get home tonight. I really hope a new, bigger home will help.

I definitely would try reintroducing. I know its a hassle keeping the kitten in one room but hopefully feliway and another introduction can help. Some cats take several months or longer to be with each other happily. The cat should not be around the kitten if he is hissing or acting at all aggressive. This indicates that he is still not comfortable with her in his space. Also if the kitten has not been spayed the cat may be reacting to her hormones. Is the cat neutered? He may find her hormones threatening. How old is the kitten and when is she being spayed.

The only thing about keeping her separate is that she is an over groomer. She has locked herself raw in three places while she was quarantined. Which is one reason we had to let her out as she was causing large open wounds on herself. He is neutered. She's about 3 months or so we aren't sure. But she's getting spayed within the next month. I just have to figure out when I have off my work and will be doing it asap. Should I be telling him no and remove him from the situation if he hisses or swats? I just really don't want to seclude her again due to the over grooming and that its not really her fault. And that they've been doing 100% ok for the past two weeks and this just randomly happened the past two days.

 

[NewYork1303]

I think if he hisses or swats then both cats should be removed from the situation. So calmly and quitely (no yelling or anything) pick him up and close him into a room she isn't in. Do the same with her (preferably at the same time if someone is there to help you). Let both cats out a minute later. 

 

[mermaidkitten]

 
I think if he hisses or swats then both cats should be removed from the situation. So calmly and quitely (no yelling or anything) pick him up and close him into a room she isn't in. Do the same with her (preferably at the same time if someone is there to help you). Let both cats out a minute later. 

Ok, I will start doing it to the both of them then instead of just one. So be silent? Or should I say a stern NO like usual? I'm so used to dogs(dont have any right now) but both of these babies just fell into my lap needing a place to go. I'm home from work now and today they've been talking and playing but I'm keeping a close eye on the both of them.

Also I'm starting to wonder if maybe he was trying to play with her at one point and I just assumed he was trying to bop her...Do they always hiss if he's angry or is it sometimes silent? They use their paws so much i'm now wondering if i mistook some play for fights...

 

[NewYork1303]

You can give a stern no so long as you aren't shouting. Being loud is more scary for cats then it is for dogs. I know that sometimes my cats use their paws for play, but usually if my adult cat is angry at the kitten (or getting her to respect his space) he will hiss or growl before swatting. 

 

[sapphire75]

Mermaidkitten,

Another option you could try, I see on the show My Cat From Hell quite frequently is to use a sight blocker. He recommends a piece of cardboard that when they first start to stare and/or growl at each other, get the sight blocker and put between them and it dissipates the situation and one or both ends up walking away.

Personally, I would try the sight blocker instead of picking up one. I am not sure I'd want to pick up an already angry kitty.