Having trouble introducing new kitten to old cat

[talkingpeanut]

It's only been a bit over a week. You need to give Oldie more time to adjust, and go totally at her pace. You can and should put Oldie in another room and take time every day to play with Newbie.

You do have to be patient though.

 

[catmadneedhelp]

It's only been a bit over a week. You need to give Oldie more time to adjust, and go totally at her pace. You can and should put Oldie in another room and take time every day to play with Newbie.

You do have to be patient though.

Right now what we do is wait until Oldie is ready to take a quick nap (almost like clockwork every day, in the evening) -- we put her in the bedroom (where she will go sleep on a pillow) and we close the door and let Newbie out for a couple hours and play with him in the main living room / second bedroom, etc. 

That being said, he's still spending most of his time in the bathroom (that's what's getting to me at the moment).

 

[cat nap]

 [thread="330014"]Having Trouble Introducing New Kitten To Old Cat/30#post_4148868  [/thread]

What I see is Newbie being totally happy in your home already. The way he purrs, and disregards Oldie's posturing are all good signs that he is getting more and more adjusted to his surroundings.

Your set-up is so spacious, and just needs extra time for Oldie to accept Newbie.

Newbie would still have to go through the cat-to-cat introduction process in any new home, and I would think that there would be no guarantees that he would be happier. In fact, it might be the opposite.

What you are seeing in the cat intros is all normal.

And being in a 'forever home' is much better than 'waiting at an adoption center,' ...no matter how many cats there are to play with, since some don't get to be lucky to be adopted.

It's only been a bit over a week. You need to give Oldie more time to adjust, and go totally at her pace. You can and should put Oldie in another room and take time every day to play with Newbie.

You do have to be patient though.

Right now what we do is wait until Oldie is ready to take a quick nap (almost like clockwork every day, in the evening) -- we put her in the bedroom (where she will go sleep on a pillow) and we close the door and let Newbie out for a couple hours and play with him in the main living room / second bedroom, etc. 

That being said, he's still spending most of his time in the bathroom (that's what's getting to me at the moment).

It has been a very short time, only about a week and a half, and what 'talkingpeanut' mentioned about going at Oldie's pace is so true. Oldie will get there, but patience and moving slow is the key.

I think you are just feeling a little frustrated that they are not automatic fast friends,...we all feel like that, when introducing animals,...and we all feel stressed when they fight, hiss, cry.

My cats are siblings, and they still get into fights from time to time.

What I would do, in your case, is go back a few steps, to using the blanket and covering the gate,...and just letting Oldie use her 'smell sense' to gather all info on Newbie.

Your idea of the towel on the bed is a good one.

And by letting Newbie out, to explore the rest of the apartment,...he is spreading his scent around,...so that is all good.

I would even use that tunnel bed in Newbie's room and place it in Oldie's room, and watch what she does.

She may seem to you, to be only spending seconds or minutes sniffing Newbie's scent, but she is really getting more and more accepting at each sniff.

You're teaching her that she will be sharing her territory, and that Newbie is a part of all that.

I know you mentioned that Oldie did not like being placed in the bathroom, but your bathroom is huge, with a door off to the side.

I would room swap, starting next week, to mingle their scents.

Give each step of the process a full week, and I'm pretty sure that Oldie's reactions will lessen.

Don't get discouraged, and don't try to rush, or like you mentioned overthink things.

Just break it down into smaller steps, and each day will get better and better. It's just time, that you need.

 

[cat nap]

@CatMadNeedHelp...How are things going today? How are you feeling?

I'm hoping that your feelings of worry or guilt are over, and only lasted a day, because you sound like a very caring cat guardian, and I know you just want what's best for everyone.

I think my post #36 might have caused you to worry more, so I apologize. I sounded like it would take forever, and that was not what I intended.

After 4 weeks you should see major improvements.

For Newbie's crying, you can get some interactive cat toys, like those ones with balls in tracks, and circles, to occupy his time more.

Plus, there are cat puzzle feeders, that you put some treats, or dry food in, to get him to spend some more time trying to figure out how to release the food.

http://www.thecatsite.com/products/catit-design-senses-play-circuit

http://www.thecatsite.com/products/kong-cat-roller-treat-dispenser-cat-toy/reviews/4634

 

[catmadneedhelp]

Not sure yet -- yesterday we had our first sign of major aggression. Oldie came right up to the fence, hissed, growled, and raised a paw as if to attack.

To be fair, I was playing with Newbie and he was darting through that triangle tunnel, which at the time was facing the gate. So when Newbie lunged through it, I think Oldie took that as a potential sign of aggression and reacted in kind.

The funny part, though, is that Newbie did not seem to care one bit. He just plopped down right in front of the fence, playing with the sushi toy, completely ignoring Oldie's hissing and raised paw. I think that really confused Oldie. She just turned and walked away.

I took tomorrow off from work so I'll be able to spend a lot more time tomorrow + this weekend trying this again to get them used to each other.

 

[cat nap]

  I know I should not laugh, either, but that Newbie is totally cute, and also very, very confusing to another cat.

He does not move, like he's bothered by another cat who hisses or growls at him at all. In the video, he seemed to just wonder what was up with Oldie, if she had a furball, or something stuck in her throat.

Newbie seems so laid back.

I think it's really good that Oldie just turned and walked away.

And Oldie sleeping at the foot of your bed, is another good sign, that she's okay.

Maybe she just has to show the little guy, that she's the boss, and he better behave.

When you're playing with Oldie, Newbie is probably going to be learning all of her moves.

Just focus on all the good stuff, even if it seems that only small improvements are being made.

 

[catmadneedhelp]

Latest video -- Oldie also hissed and growled after the video ended but it was nothing crazy. 

 

[cat nap]

Have there been any small improvements with Oldie and Newbie's cat introductions?

Even little set-backs are okay, since it's part of the process.

The last video was great. Oldie seemed to be more bothered by the noise of the toy, than by Newbie staring at her.

If you need to, you can place a smooth round ball in Newbie's food dish, or get him a stainless bundt-cake-type dish, to slow down his eating, if he eats too fast.

Putting Oldie's food dish down first, then Newbie's food, will also help with acceptance of the new cat.

 

[catmadneedhelp]

 

[catmadneedhelp]

Basically whenever they get close, Oldie growls and hisses at Newbie and occasionally pops him with a paw -- so far though it doesn't seem to be overly aggressive, no actual pain being inflicted, etc. Newbie just wants to play, play, play.

 

[cat nap]

It's good that Newbie is reading Oldie's signals, and stops dead in his tracks, and avoids her in the first encounter.

Also good that Oldie does not chase Newbie.

So true, that Newbie just wants to play, and Oldie is just not ready for that, yet.

You might have to do the playing with both of them with wand toys, to get them both tired, and then see how their interactions go.

Are they each finding favourite spots in the apartment to sleep in? Either high, or low comfortable spots?

 

[catmadneedhelp]

They each sleep in various spots (the cat-tree, the couch, the foot of the bed, the kitty-beds we have set up in both the living room and bathroom, etc).

Yesterday we had both cats sleeping on the couch a few feet away from each other (me holding Newbie, who was sleeping, and Oldie, who was on the couch sleeping between my SO and I). It didn't last for very long but they were at least comfortable enough to let their guards down for a while. Many times yesterday, Newbie and Oldie would get locked into a staring content without any animosity (i.e. Newbie wasn't jumping on her), which was nice -- I think he's learning not to divebomb her all the time, as it makes her angry with him. Progress, little by little, I suppose!

 

[cat nap]

 
They each sleep in various spots (the cat-tree, the couch, the foot of the bed, the kitty-beds we have set up in both the living room and bathroom, etc).

Yesterday we had both cats sleeping on the couch a few feet away from each other (me holding Newbie, who was sleeping, and Oldie, who was on the couch sleeping between my SO and I). It didn't last for very long but they were at least comfortable enough to let their guards down for a while. Many times yesterday, Newbie and Oldie would get locked into a staring content without any animosity (i.e. Newbie wasn't jumping on her), which was nice -- I think he's learning not to divebomb her all the time, as it makes her angry with him. Progress, little by little, I suppose!

Yes, that is amazing progress. I am actually very happy that Oldie does not run at Newbie.

And Newbie does have to learn "not to 'divebomb' her all the time"...

..That was the one thing that I found the most difficult, to do. To make a kitten understand that the older cat does NOT want to play like when they were younger, or that they had to leave the older cat alone. 

(My older one would just find higher areas to sleep on, and then whenever the kittens would try to bully him, I'd have to use my voice, or re-direct the kittens with toys, or place them out of the room, to let the older cat sleep. He seemed to like it, though, since he would keep an eye on what they were doing, running and playing, like kittens do. If he got too tired, he'd go to sleep in one of the bedrooms.)

Oldie, is not really that old, though. She just probably has a different style of playing, or prefers toys, and more predictable objects.

If you can use food as a positive association, and motivation, then that is really good.  Especially, if they are both becoming more relaxed around eating near each other.

 

[catmadneedhelp]

Yeah, definitely -- Oldie is more of a toy chaser (chasing string, chasing toys to play fetch, etc) rather than a roughhouser. Newbie pretty much wants to chase and jump on everything that moves.

You're definitely right that they have different styles.

We recently held a party with ~12 guests, and Newbie was dying for the spotlight -- he was super sociable, playing with anyone who was willing, and occasionally dozing off in people's laps when he was tired. He must have been out and about for at least 7 hours of constant playtime and naps. By far his busiest day -- he was out like a light at the end of it all. Could just plop him anywhere and he'd fall asleep in seconds.

Oldie, in contrast, is really skittish around large, noisy crowds and prefers to go hide in the closet until the crowd thins down to about 3-4 people, then she's comfortable coming out to say hello.

 

[cat nap]

Well, granted, kittens mostly want to 'chase and jump on everything that moves'...

...light, lint, flies, ...basically anything. Then pillows, socks, toys,...which they toss about on their own. Curtains, blinds, and any knick-knacks that you leave laying around will also be targets. The speed that kittens move is unbelievably quick.

Yeah, they definitely have different styles, and cat personalities.

That makes sense, too, why Oldie would need more time to get used to Newbie. Things may be over-stimulating for her, and she needs to take in things more slowly, at a more controlled pace versus the 'totally social, out and about, spotlight hugging, need to explore everything now, kitten type'. 

  Sometimes the second type, gets into a lot of trouble, not being too cautious. They are both adorable types.

Kitten proofing a home for the second type, is an on-going learning experience. Everyday finds something interesting and new. 

The good thing is that they all mature, as they get older, but you really have to enjoy all the moments, because they go so quick.