Having problems with cats not getting along

muramcon · Mar 12, 2014

Hi everybody, I am a new member here. I am having a problem with my cats not getting along, and I don't know how to fix it. My hubby and I have 3 furbabies: Amelia is a 7 y/o female that we adopted 2 years ago. Connor and Murphy are 2 y/o nearly-identical twins that were adopted 6 months after Amelia. When we first introduced them, my husband completely ignored my instructions in the standard cat introduction methods and just threw the boys in with Amelia. That didn't go very well, Amelia was terrified, and I convinced hubby to do things the right way. We seperated them for about 1 1/2 weeks, keeping the boys in the bedroom. Periodically we'd let them in the rest of the apartment and put Amelia in the bedroom so she could smell them. Eventually they all learned to live together, but to this day Amelia won't sleep with them or groom them.

So now the recent trouble: Sometimes when the boys walk by she will start snarling, hissing and even snorting like a pig. She never attacks them. When the boys hear all of her commotion they start to chase her. I don't know if they think it's a game or what. She initiates everything. One of the boys could walk by minding their own business, not even paying her attention, and she will start to freak. Other times they will be laying a few feet apart and be fine. Sometimes she even lets Connor lick her head briefly. So I think she is the problem. The boys won't initiate anything, but they will chase her when she kicks up a fuss. Plus then it is 2 against one and she often gets cornered, which makes things worse.

When we adopted Amelia, her intake papers said she was surrendered because her owners had too many animals. Hubby and I would really like to get one more cat when we move to a bigger place, but I want Amelia to be happy, and not antagonizing other cats. Is there a way to fix this? If I am around and she starts hissing I try to re-direct things. Once she makes noises the boys won't take their attention off her. Sometimes if I pick her up and take her to another room it will defuse the situation, other times the boys follow and chase her as soon as I set her down. We also live in a very small apartment. We will be moving to a house in late summer when our lease is up. Sorry the post is so long, but are there any suggestions out there?

tdonline · Mar 12, 2014

I can't post much as I'm at work but it sounds like Amelia needs her space. Hopefully moving to a bigger house will help. There is a lot here about fighting and aggression between resident cats. Use the search function on a couple of key words. You will see lots and lots of advice.

In the mean time, you could consider making more vertical space available and separating Amelia during certain times of the day. She may just be one of those cats who needs more space and alone time.

di and bob · Mar 12, 2014

Your little girl sounds just like my Chrissy around her 'brothers'. Some cats, especially females I have found, just don't like to be friendly with others and need their space. All the females I have owned have always hissed at the males when they got too close. I agree that she needs some vertical space, my Chrissy would nap on top of the refrigerator. I would bet once you have more space it will ease somewhat. I don't think she is unhappy, once she gets a little older and gets more confidence, she'll be the queen of your household. When getting another cat make sure it is a young kitten in a multicat household, it seems that all cats are accepting of young kittens. Good luck, and keep us posted!

muramcon · Mar 12, 2014

Thanks for the replies! About the vertical space, our living room has a vaulted ceiling with a 12 ft blank wall, and I am planning to make "kitty shelves" for it, with maybe a larger shelf at the top for napping. We do have a kitty tower, but now that I think of it, the boys tend to monopolize it. If we get another cat it will be a kitten, since hubby really wants a baby. I feel kind of bad since everyone always wants the cute babies and ignores the older cats, but if it will help household harmony that's good.