- Joined
- Oct 25, 2012
- Messages
- 109
- Purraise
- 23
It's been almost one month since I lost my best friend and companion, Tabby. Instead of it becoming easier as the days go on, I find it getting more difficult to believe that he's really gone and I will never see him again. Everywhere I turn I expect to see him, but he's not there. Whenever I'm gone during the day and return home at night, I get a twinge of pain in my heart when I open the door and he's not there to greet me. The tears still come every night, and in the mornings. I still haven't been able to put away all of his toys. I live alone, but I never knew how lonely I would feel without my warm-blooded companion curled up on my lap at night. He was a feral cat, but became incredibly bonded to me and needed my affection and attention more than anything else in life. We shared that incredible bond and he trusted only me for 12 yrs. I still feel like I let him down somehow, although I know that's not really true. I had to make the decision to let him go when I was in a full-blown, crisis mode so now I keep second guessing the decision even though the vet didn't give me any other options due to his advanced heart condition. One minute he was here, the next he was gone and I had to drive home with an empty pet carrier in my car. Sometimes it still just seems very surreal. I actually woke up the other night thinking I heard him meowing at the foot of my bed. I'm having a hard time getting past this, and just felt I needed to share these feelings with others who know the pain I am going through. Thank you for listening, I am very grateful for this site.