Had to put my Earl down.

[atmosphere1122]

I found out shortly after getting my 9 month kitten fixed that he had feline leukemia . For I while I was syringe feeding him and he was having good days and bad days but was always tired and weak. Yesterday when I woke up he was sleeping with me and he had pooped the bed because he couldn't get up . He tried to jump off the bed and he fell straight on his side and couldn't get up. Whenever he would lift his head it would wobble like he was very disoriented . He was also very anemic and stopped eating again. I knew that it was time, so I brought him to the vet and had them check if it was possibly an ear infection, it wasn't , it turns out it was the feline leukemia messing with his nervous system. The vet said the only thing I could do is probably a transfusion which I cannot afford and he said even if I did that he would continue to face the same problems so I decided to give my poor Earl some peace. I stayed in the room with him the whole time and held his hand and petted his head and told him how much I loved him. After I took him home and buried him in the yard. This was my first pet that was all my responsibility and I hope I did the right thing. Now I feel very sad and the house feels very empty without him. I miss him so much. I'm writing on here to ask if anybody has some advise? And just honestly to vent. I feel like no one truly understands that is close to me... Thank you.

 

[zed xyzed]

I am so sorry for your loss. You eased his suffering and were there when he passed, sadly often that is all we can do. When you are up to it you should consider a tribute to Earl on the rainbow bridge section. 

 

[red top rescue]

Do go over to our Crossing The Bridge Forum (it is under the General Forums tab),  and you will have lots of people to talk to who are going through the same thing as you are.  It is very sad to lose a pet whom we love so much, and even harder when it's one so young.  You can get another cat or kitten when you are ready, but you will never replace Earl.  No cat replaces another, your heart just gets bigger as you love more cats.  Here is another site you might want to visit.  There is a candle ceremony every Monday.  You may want to join in this week.  http://www.petloss.com/.

We are very sorry for your loss!

 

[donutte]

I'm so sorry for your loss, such a short life. He was loved though, and I know that's not much comfort but that was a big thing to him, I'm sure. Rest in peace, little guy.

 

[lavishsqualor]

You were there for him for nine months and gave him love, shelter and food. As a multi-site apartment manager, every day I see so many abandoned and feral cats worthy of those things but who never get them.  Your Earl was incredibly lucky and you served him well right to the end.  None of us can ask for more that. 

 

[atmosphere1122]

Thank you all so much . Your words mean more than I could possibly describe. I will eventually post on the crossing over the bridge forum , thank you for informing me.

 

[misterwhiskers]

I'm so sorry. You gave him a good life, for the time you were able to. I think God knows who can take care of his special ones, if that's any consolation. [emoji]128532[/emoji]

 

[jcat]

I'm very sorry for your loss. It's particularly tragic when they're so young. RIP, Earl.

 

[macha 143]

I am so sorry for your loss...

Rest in peace Earl..

(((hugs)))

 

[ginny]

I'm so sorry for your loss of your dear kitten Earl.  Regardless how long (or short) you have them, it's never long enough, is it?  It sounds like you sure did the right thing, although I KNOW it doesn't feel right.  I had to have my Gracie PTS in July.  I still miss her and wish I could go back and do everything differently.  

Do be careful who you share your heart with.  So many people just do not get it, like we do.  Hugs to you.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Hugs to you.  So hard to lose one, and even harder when they are so young. Listen, you did exactly the right thing.  You fought like a tiger for him as long as his life was happy, and assisted him to cross the bridge peacefully when that life became a burden.  No one could ask for more. 

Rest you gentle, Little Earl, sleep you sound.

 

[di and bob]

He was meant to find someone like you, who would love him and care for him as long as it was possible. He knows he was so incredibly fortunate to have you in his life, and loved you all the more for it. Although it absolutely broke your heart to do so, you took on his suffering as your own and gave him peace. I'm certain it was a great comfort to him, to have you with him to help him cross over to the Bridge. None of us would let our loved ones suffer one more minute then they would have to, please try to not dwell on his end, but celebrate what you two shared. Your precious memories will comfort you, and we will offer what we can, we know the pain of a broken heart. It helps to surround yourself with people who understand what you are going through, to share your pain and release some of the anguish.I'll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers, that you both find peace.  RIP dear Earl, your time on this earth was way too short, but know you will never be forgotten and will be forever held in a loving heart! 

 

[loopycann]

Di and Bob,How can I improve on those beautiful sentiments? I cannot.But I will add that you ,atmosphere1122, were very loyal and dedicated to your love.I commend you for delivering him gently into the arms of our creator where he will be waiting for you.When I had my dear domino put down on acct.of cancer,I was so devastated and hysterical I sent him to the vet with my grown daughter ,who was close to domino as well? I regret that decision to this day.Although he was blind from the tumor,he knew I wasn't there.ill never forgive myself.I know that what you did was hard but you did it and I commend you but also I'm so sorry for the very awful fact that you had to say goodbye so soon.Take care of yourself,there's a lil cat that needs you unfortunately and you can't rescue it unless you get past this terrible hurt.It will go away. Eventually.

 

[les26]

So sorry to hear about Earl's problems and passing, you did all that you could for him and he knows that, and is at peace now, no more pain or suffering, and you will see him again someday. I know that your heart is broken right now, but it does get better but it takes time, it is something that you cannot rush or force. If you are sad, cry...if you are happy, laugh...if you are mad, be mad....whatever you feel just go with it, remember the good times that you had and remember him in good health not sick.....

Rest in peace Earl, run free and play and have a great new life.....

 

[atmosphere1122]

Thank you all... I miss him so much [emoji]128148[/emoji] Eventually I know I want to get another cat because I loved Earl so much and I still have so much love to give. I'm just nervous and scared about having to go through that again. Any precautions that are necessary if I do decide to adopt again? Do I have to throw away all of earls stuff? Thank you [emoji]128575[/emoji]

 

[ruthm]

I'm so sorry for your loss, what a terrible thing for such a little  guy :-(   Fly free sweet little Earl and land softly- you were so loved.

I wish I knew the answer to  your question RE: sanitation and getting another kitty, but I don't know.  You should ask over in Health- I'm sure someone with experience would know.

 

[ginny]

Thank you all... I miss him so much [emoji]128148[/emoji] Eventually I know I want to get another cat because I loved Earl so much and I still have so much love to give. I'm just nervous and scared about having to go through that again. Any precautions that are necessary if I do decide to adopt again? Do I have to throw away all of earls stuff? Thank you [emoji]128575[/emoji]

Your fears are very understandable.  We're never ready to say goodbye, ever.  Kudos to you for having such a kind loving heart to be willing to help and love another kitty or two or more.  After my Garfy died back in '04, I couldn't bear the thought of getting another kitty although I still had his brother Sammy.  But it was that same week he died that I first saw Gracie, a feral kitty, then a few months later I started feeding her and her kittens.  I had her for 11 years.  She just passed in July.  I still have her children and a nephew of hers.  Dreading the day, but also learning to appreciate today, while I still have them.  

All I know about Feline Leukemia is that there is a test for it.  Don't know how accurate it is, but at least you would know from the start, if you wanted to know.  I'm sorry, I don't know about precautions or his stuff.  Hugs to you!

 

[zed xyzed]

I found this bit of info at the link below

How is FeLV spread? 
Cats persistently infected with FeLV serve as sources of infection. Virus is shed in very high quantities in saliva and nasal secretions, but also in urine, feces, and milk from infected cats. Cat-to-cat transfer of virus may occur from a bite  wound, during mutual grooming, and (though rarely) through the shared use of litter boxes and feeding dishes. Transmission can also take place from an infected mother cat to her kittens, either before they are born or while they are nursing. FeLV doesn't survive long outside a cat's body—probably less than a few hours under normal household conditions.

http://www.vet.cornell.edu/fhc/Health_Information/brochure_felv.cfm

 

[nurseangel]

I am so sorry for your loss.  Please take comfort in that you did everything you could for Earl.  He knew what it was like to be loved and cherished.  He was blessed to have you in his life, as you were to have him.