Grieving over my cat

[nurseangel]

I'm so sorry for your family's loss of this handsome gentleman.   I cried reading about you and your daughter's experience at the vet.  What a terrible shock.  I don't have any answers for what could have happened to Chockie and it is likely you will never know.  Bless you for giving him and Vannie a wonderful, loving home.   

 

[shenly chu]

As a member who has experienced a lot of loss while being a rescuer of abandoned kitties, we truly understand what you feel right now. I have not been on this site for a few weeks, because we just lost another kitten that just was unable to thrive. He was tiny and sweet, but so dehydrated and unable to eat on his own. We put our heart and souls into trying to rehabilitate him into good health. To no avail. He was in my wife's hands, on her chest as he took his final breath. He started the day with seizures, and she informed me of the down turn. We had just a few short minutes left with him, and my wife whispered to him to "go play with Gimpy", and he took one last open mouth breath, and fell limp.

It crushed us both, and we have stayed to ourselves since that tragedy. It has been a few weeks now, and I am back to reading posts again. As a constantly bereaved rescuer, we know we can't save them all, especially the tiniest kittens we offer find alone on the streets. I always try to comfort my wife, who takes on the motherboard of the work (she just has a gift, and can administer the medications much better than I can) by pointing out all the successes we have living in our home. We have more than 30 rescued cats, all of which would probably not be alive today.

I also focus on the ones that are still in danger, keeping busy helps heal the wounds of a recent loss. Another idea that you should consider as soon as possible, is finding another kitten in need of rescue. Bringing in another cat, especially one that is little, can help you all heal by giving a kitten a new lease on life. This will give Vannie a friend and a purpose as well. Nothing can ever replace Chockie, but you might be surprised at the ability of our 4 legged friends to return to us, often in one or more new arrivals. Our Gimpy, who was our first rescue, passed late last year from acute kidney disease, has returned to us in new rescues, each carrying a different trait that was specific to Gimpy. She will always be with us, and we have found the same kind of love in our latest rescues.

We wish you the best in these trying times, if you have questions or need support, don't hesitate to ask us. Sincerely, the kittykeepers.

Kittykeepers...I feel you guys.   Yes, we all want to help them ...if only we can save them all right?  For sure Chockie is irreplaceable.  My heart will forever have a hole because of losing him.  Thinking of our happy days keep me going and moving on.  I still have Vannie to take care of.  He is hurting as much. They were together and doing and sharing everything  since day 1.  So it must be hard for him too.  My family decided to get Vannie another companion.  He's been sad and lonely these past few days.  My daughter and I are trying our best to give Vannie the love, care and attention that he needs but I think having another cat would be even better for him.  So we will get one soon.  Thank you for your kind words.  Give my regards to your loving wife.  A big hug from me to her...

 

[shenly chu]

 
I'm so sorry for your family's loss of this handsome gentleman.   I cried reading about you and your daughter's experience at the vet.  What a terrible shock.  I don't have any answers for what could have happened to Chockie and it is likely you will never know.  Bless you for giving him and Vannie a wonderful, loving home.   

Yes, I'm very very sorry too....Chockie was the sweetest, affectionate, quiet cat I'd ever know.  He didn't meow much but he expressed his feelings towards his actions.  I missed his smile, his kisses, his headbutt, his head resting on my neck and most of all ...I missed carrying him in my arms like a baby.....he loves that very much.....But knowing I did gave him my all......It warmed my heart that he did know I love how much I loved him...

 

[shenly chu]

 
Although you should check your house for any toxic substances, especially house plants, I truly believe Chockie died of a undiagnosed heart condition, this follows his symptoms, drooling, choking, and collapse. If that vet truly thought there was a toxin problem he could have ordered a blood test to determine what it was, it would have helped you in determining why. Since the condition might be inherited, I would have an inexpensive x-ray performed on Vannie and if there are any abnormalities, further tests. Many heart conditions can be treated if caught in time, but don't in any way blame yourself because this is totally unpredictable in such a young healthy cat. Chockie would be the last one to lay blame, you gave him love and a wonderful home that he shared with such a loving family. You are heartbroken because he was a valued member of your family and you loved him very much.The pain is equal to the love. He came into your life for a reason, even though it hurts so bad to lose him, he brought so much into your life the pain is worth knowing him rather then never knowing him at all. He would never want you to be so sad, he loves you too much for that, he would want you to go on and be happy, just like you would want for him if something happened to you. You formed a bond with him and nothing can take that away, it is a feeling, spiritual, it is a love that cannot truly be explained, it is nothing you can touch, but it is there all the same and always will be. Cherish the memories you have of him, they will bring you comfort in the future, and though his physical body is no more, the 'essence' that was him will surround you for all time. Please don't dwell on his death, all those should haves, could haves, bring nothing but heartache and serve no purpose, try to celebrate the love you shared and take care of his brother who is grieving too. Perform an act of kindness in Chockie's name, it helps to make you feel a little better and I know he would approve. Pay for an adoption or neutering at your local shelter, if money is tight give your time to comfort those beautiful babies waiting for adoption, it distracts from the pain and does so much good. Bring some pet food to the local food pantry or shelter, it is always welcome. My heart goes out to you, I wish I could take away your pain, but the past can never be changed and the future is unknown. But the past can bring knowledge that can change our future, use it wisely. You will be blessed for hurting so bad from loving so much, kiss Vinnie for me and please take care, you are not alone in your grief..... RIP sweet Chockie, you will never be forgotten and will be forever held in a loving heart! 

I cried like a river reading this.... Your words are on point and getting through my heart and soul. " He came into your life for a reason, even though it hurts so bad to lose him, he brought so much into your life the pain is worth knowing him rather then never knowing him at all. He would never want you to be so sad, he loves you too much for that, he would want you to go on and be happy, just like you would want for him if something happened to you. You formed a bond with him and nothing can take that away, it is a feeling, spiritual, it is a love that cannot truly be explained, it is nothing you can touch, but it is there all the same and always will be. Cherish the memories you have of him, they will bring you comfort in the future, and though his physical body is no more, the 'essence' that was him will surround you for all time." These quotes really describe it all....my feelings ...my thoughts.... my Chockie.

Maybe you are right.  I've read that cat can die of undiagnosed heart condition even though Chockie and Vannie are regularly checked and have their annual vaccination.  We live in an apartment and we don't have any plants.  They are both indoor cats. They do not step out of our door. All of our household sprays, detergent, softener and etc are inside a drawer.  I'm well aware of the dangers of these substances not only for cats but my daughter as well :-)  I had Vannie checked by his vet already. She said Vannie looks fine and normal.  I just have to watch him closely in the next few days or so.  You're right, I better have Vannie have an x-ray check on him.  Yes, that was my first concern, after Chockie died.  What had caused it.  Because I still have another cat.  I wanna make sure that it will not happen to Vannie as well.  He just said, "it can be anything".  We just don't know which one had the toxics that killed him?  

In honor of my Chockie.  I will adopt another cat tomorrow.  It will be good for Vannie as well I'm sure.  Thank you again for your kind and thoughtful words...I can't thank you enough.....it means so much to me....

 

[thekittykeepers]

We are glad to hear you decided to find Vannie a new companion, everyone will benefit from a new member of the family, especially during these painful days. Please include photos when the new arrival comes home. I am sure Vannie will bond with another kitty and probably become a protective companion as well. Good luck, keep us updated, sincerely, the kittykeepers.

 

[shenly chu]

We are glad to hear you decided to find Vannie a new companion, everyone will benefit from a new member of the family, especially during these painful days. Please include photos when the new arrival comes home. I am sure Vannie will bond with another kitty and probably become a protective companion as well. Good luck, keep us updated, sincerely, the kittykeepers.

Meet the new addition in our family...

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• shenly chu
• Jul 5, 2016

 

[thekittykeepers]

Just wow, what a beautiful little kitty!