Frustrated and needing advice...

[malibupineapple]

A little background...My brother in law took in Belle 3 years ago. She was a declawed stray and was found wandering in an apartment complex he worked at. He took her in with no proper introduction to the house, which has 2 dogs. Belle hated the dogs which led to her peeing on everything and occasionally throwing up her food. My sister and brother in law finally had enough and wanted to get rid of her. I decided to take her to my house to see if that would be a better fit for her. I have a cat that I've had for 14 years, Moe, so I knew this was going to be tricky, but I wanted to try and make it work. I brought Belle over on Sunday and set up her sanctuary room in the bathroom. Everything she needs is in there. For the first day she was fine, she was using the litter box, etc. But she's puked up her food a few times since then. I go into the bathroom to give her some love and then when I try to leave she tries to run out of the room, once I do leave, she meows at the door for a really long time. I work full time so there was one day that she was stuck in the sanctuary room for 12 hours, which I just don't feel is fair for her. I've let her out of the room a few times to explore the house, but I'm constantly watching her because I'm afraid she's going to pee on something. And  I bought Belle a pheromone collar to try and calm her down, but I have no idea if it's working or not, and they've said that it takes time.  I've tried feeding the 2 cats by the door and even fed them in the same room last night. They were doing ok, but then Belle (the new cat) followed Moe (my 14 year old) and attacked her.

The more I think about this situation, the more I feel like I really don't have the time and resources available to give this cat a good home. It's not fair for her to be stuck in a bathroom for hours at a time when she clearly doesn't want to be in there. I'm doing my best to try and be patient with this situation, but at this point I feel like I'm prolonging the inevitable. I'm just looking for some advice on what to do. I feel horrible and stressed about this situation, I can only imagine how she feels. I know that Belle really needs to be the only animal for someone.

I'm just looking for some advice and suggestions on what to do. This is tearing me up.

 

[dsue]

Have you ever watched the show "My cat from hell?" He gives great advice on this sort of prob. He is the Cat Whisperer! May want to look if the show is on Demand (i think it is ) to view old episodes. Anyway...Declawed cats feel more vulnerable can't protect themselves around another cat. It is a cruel procedure to declaw especially when so many great alternatives, such as simply purchasing a good scratching post.
Sometimes extra litter boxes solve the urinating prob. The fact that they ate together near each other is a good sign. You want to supervise these visits closely and distract her if she gets aggressive. You can shake pennies in a container or drop something "accidentally."
Perhaps you also need to get some cat furniture so she has a place to go and not feel so anxious. Cats don't like being confined to a bathroom. It sounds like you are in the right direction however! Don't quit before the miracle, as they say! Good luck!

 

[malibupineapple]

Perhaps you also need to get some cat furniture so she has a place to go and not feel so anxious. Cats don't like being confined to a bathroom. It sounds like you are in the right direction however! Don't quit before the miracle, as they say! Good luck!

This gave me a little hope and I thank you. I will try purchasing another piece of furniture for her so she has a place to call her own. I'm trying my best to make this happen peacefully.

 

[dsue]

Hope it's getting better??. She has had a lot of major upheavals in her life and sounded like you really are inspired to help her.
Cat From Hell has great advice even if you don't go on the show!

 

[gcat]

First of all, I’d like to thank you for taking in this kitty and giving her the proper care.

 A sanctuary room is a good way to keep them from becoming overwhelmed at all of their new surroundings.

If she’s been vomiting her food since your brother took her in, it may be because of stress, but I would definitely take her to a vet to see if she has any underlying diseases. Vomiting food can be a symptom of liver disease, kidney disease, intestinal obstruction, inflammatory bowel disease, or diabetes.

It does sound like she’s suffering from anxiety, whether it’s separation anxiety, anxiety from being overwhelmed by a new environment (which could still happen, even in a sanctuary room, because of the previous experiences she had with your brother-in-laws’ dogs and any other potential stressors). When she constantly meows at the door and tries to get out when you leave, those are signs of growing separation anxiety. Every cat has its own level of independence, but it seems like she’s been through so much, and IMO, 12 hours is too long to leave her at home by herself at this point when she's already stressed and overwhelmed by everything that's been going on- the vomiting, the smell of a new cat, the new surroundings, etc.

Pheromone collars do wear off after a month or so, so if you do see improvement, be sure to purchase the replacement before you take the collar off. There have been mixed reviews about the collars; some are positive, and some say they frankly don’t work at all. I’ve never used a pheromone collar, but I have used a Feliway ComfortZone diffuser for my cats. They’re available at basically at any pet store and even WalMart.

Belle and Moe need to be very slowly introduced to each other (the process can take a week or even longer) through a process called scent-swapping. There are some useful articles about this on TCS:

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/introducing-cats-to-cats

If you can’t make accommodations for her and the situation grows worse after a week or so, the best choice may be to rehome her. Please carefully consider before taking her to a humane shelter. Remember, many are over-crowded and usually between 66% – 95% of the animals taken in are put “to sleep.” Pets that aren’t often suffer terribly from loneliness and confusion from being abandoned into a harsh environment. Some do not have adoption procedures, and others are so overrun with unclaimed pets, that they screen potential adopters poorly, if at all. Other types of shelters are “no-kill” (these usually only destroy un-adoptable, sick, or aggressive pets). No-kill organizations, as well as rescue groups are often under-funded and over-crowded as well. They may refuse to take Belle because they only have room for the strays that they must take.

If you do decide to rehome her, you should take the time to find a new home for her yourself; this includes asking responsible and trusted neighbors and close friends who have the time and responsibility to take care of a cat (a crucial step in the process is to question them closely to see if they seem capable of taking care of Belle- a home check would be ideal).

However, it does seem like she’s starting to love on you and warm up to you (when she misses you so terribly when you leave her sanctuary room).

It’s going to be another setback both emotionally and physically for her, even though in the long run it may be the best for her.

Please carefully consider your situation; to entertain Belle during the day, you could get her cat toys (e.g. DaBird, Cat Dancer, catnip mice, kitty-safe stuffed animals, etc.) or maybe even a small homemade or store-bought kitty condo that she can climb and hang out on. A scratching post is a must as it helps them satisfy their natural instinct to sharpen their claws and also prevents any potential destructive behavior that she may develop (because of the separation anxiety).

Best wishes for you and Belle.

 

 

[MoochNNoodles]

I also recommend the article GCat has linked above.  It really hasn't been long at all since you brought Belle home.  It's completely normal for introductions to take WEEKS and even a few months.  She needs that safe place and to be more comfortable there before you try introducing her to Moe again.  Patience really is key; especially for cats who have been through traumatic things like Belle.  I agree with a vet visit to rule out health issues.  It may also be a good idea to explore her diet to see if that is behind her throwing up.  There are lots of good articles on nutrition here and knowledgeable folks in the Nutrition forum as well. 

The fact that they ate in the same room is a positive sign!  I suggest following the tips in the article and in the order they are listed there.  If you try to move on to the next step and things don't go so well; back up and try again in a few days.  When we have introduced new cats; the newcomer has stayed isolated for the first full week!  It really gives them time to relax and get to know us before meeting the rest of the fur family.  Fortunately; we didn't have to isolate anyone in a bathroom so that may make a difference. 

Good luck and please keep us updates!  If you have any more questions; please don't hesitate to ask too!

 

[gcat]

The fact that they ate in the same room is a positive sign!  I suggest following the tips in the article and in the order they are listed there.  If you try to move on to the next step and things don't go so well; back up and try again in a few days.  When we have introduced new cats; the newcomer has stayed isolated for the first full week!  It really gives them time to relax and get to know us before meeting the rest of the fur family.  Fortunately; we didn't have to isolate anyone in a bathroom so that may make a difference. 

Good luck and please keep us updates!  If you have any more questions; please don't hesitate to ask too!

Same here. We currently have six cats and a foster puppy and most of the work is introductions.

 We are lucky enough to have a cat nursery and a sun room dedicated to the cats in our house. The cat nursery is the temporary sanctuary area for the new kitty while we do one or even two weeks of scent swapping between the kitties. Patience is the key here- if there are any, even subtle, signs of aggression, immediately back away and gently put her back in her isolation room.

Please keep us updated. Best of luck.

 

[malibupineapple]

I finally got a chance to check my post and seeing all your positive comments really made me happy!

So here's a little bit of an update. I've gotten my two ladies into a little bit of a routine. I'm still working on being patient although it's difficult at times, I have noticed a small improvement in Belle's behavior towards Moe over the last week or so. Any improvement is better than none at all so I'll take what I can get!

Because I worry about what will happen with these two girls when I'm not there, I separate them at night and then during the day, Moe (who is an indoor/outdoor cat)  is outside and Belle has run of the house, that way Belle isn't inside the bathroom for hours and Moe loves being outside. I live in Arizona so the weather is warm enough that I can leave the screen door open and Moe hangs out on the porch and Belle can run around or sun herself during the day when I'm at work. Belle can see Moe and Moe can see Belle from the door. I let them in the house together when I'm home and for the most part, other than constantly supervising them and running around watching them like they're toddlers,  I think the hissing has minimized but every once in a while Belle acts a little crazy and I have to clap my hands or shake a can of coins to distract her from the situation. That seems to help. Belle is much more interested in Moe than Moe is in her. Then when it comes time to feed them their wet food at night, I put the baby gate up and they eat on the opposite sides of the gate. But they ARE eating and they are very aware of each other, which is good.

Belle is still puking up food every once in a while, so I'm going to have to take her to the vet soon. She also drinks like there's no tomorrow - so she definitely needs to get checked out.

Her separation anxiety is still pretty high. I leave to go take the trash out and she's at the door crying for me. Does anyone have suggestions on what to do to get her to chill out when I leave? I have no idea if this pheromone collar is working or not. She seems to have calmed down, but I don't know if that's because of the collar, or because of the routine, or because she has a litter box that she can use and not worry about the dogs coming for her - or maybe all of the above?! I will say, *FINGERS CROSSED* I haven't noticed her marking any spots, and she's been using her litter box regularly. *Again, FINGERS CROSSED!*

Also, I can't find a single toy that she's been interested in. She just loves to run back and forth down the hall, but toys? Nope! Anyone have a suggestion for that too?

So....that's my exhausting update! I really appreciate all your comments and input, this forum is pretty awesome. I feel like there's a small, little light at the end of this long cat tunnel.

xoxo