Feeling Bad About Catching A Feral Cat.

[KimmoKat1]

I've trapped and brought home 3 cats. An additional feral was given to me by a friend. The 1st one was a senior and responded quickly to me. I believe she had a home for most of her life. I only had her 7 months before she passed unexpectedly. I miss her every day. One adopted me. I believe he was more stray than feral, too. Last week I trapped and caught a cat I've been fretting over for a month. With 3weeks of record cold I lost sleep. I did what other forms suggested. Fed it same time, same place every day. Skipped feeding it the day before I trapped it to insure it would be hungry enough to enter the trap. Worked in 5 minutes. It's been isolated in my master bathroom and it immediately used litter box. Does that mean it was once a pet? It's been a week and it still won't let me near it. Should I release it after it's vet check/neutering (spaying, not sure of sex)? Today it meowed for the first time. I want to give it a safe, warm home but only if it's happy. I can live with it hating me...I have a dog lol. It doesn't need to like me to stay, but if it misses it's life outside how can I tell? I want to do right by this cat. Please advise me how I can tell what's best.

 

[lab mom]

I am in the same boat...I trapped one 6 weeks ago...and although I have made some progress with him ...ultimately he seems miserable. I had him neutered 2 weeks after I trapped him and it has seemed to calm him down some...He won't let me touch him and just seems overly sensitive to being indoors..it all seems totally foreign to him. I can't even keep him...I was hoping to socialize him to be able to find him a home....but not sure how I would find someone with a heart like mine that would take him in and work with him ...UGH

 

[jcat]

Many ferals will immediately use a litter box. When you say she's meowing, is she just meowing while alone in the bathroom, or are the meows directed at you? If she's "talking" to you, she's a stray or perhaps a semi-feral.

One week is far too early to decide whether she's going to have to be released again. Many pet cats won't allow physical contact for several weeks after being put in strange surroundings.

 

[kittychick]

As jcat noted - if she (or he) meowed AT you (vs a crying meow when no one's in the room with him)? If he meowed AT you - - it's highly unlikely he's feral. Ferals are virtually silent, as they don't want to alert their prey (or what could be preying on them!) as to their position. If you watch a colony of ferals, you'll see that they're virtually silent, greeting each other by head butting, etc. - not meowing. There are some theories about non-feral cats meowing - and many think that they see humans verbalize, so they verbalize - in their own way- to communicate. So if she/he's already meowing at you/when with you, she's not feral - - certainly at least not completely feral.

I'm sure lots will weigh in on this - - I definitely will add more tomorrow (early meeting so unfortunately have to turn off the computer and be an adult.

The very, very short answer (that's VERY abbreviated and "big picture" only in both cases) is that socializing - - whether feral, stray, or just nervous - - -just plain takes time. Alot of us on this forum have socialized every level from feral to purring lap cat and everything in between - - and have lots of advice that can hopefully make the process easier and perhaps a little quicker. Try to remember that they don't understand - - they don't speak your language (yet!), and all they know is that for now, their lives have been upended. But that fear and unease can be worked with - - and when it works, it's so rewarding. So don't give up! This forum can help walk you through it...and hopefully you'll come out in the end with kitties you wouldn't give up for anything!

 

[rubysmama]

Hello and welcome to The Cat Site. I don't have any experience with socializing ferals, but have been reading these threads, and love following the progress as scared cats become loving, couch potatoes.

Here's a few articles that may have some helpful info:
A Feral Cat Or A Stray Cat? How To Tell The Difference
Should You Try And Tame A Feral Cat?
Handling Feral Cats
Adopting A Stray Cat

 

[Shane Kent]

KimmoKat1

Ignore any and all feelings of guilt. The cat might hate you at first but they get over it once they learn how good life indoors is. With that said, not all cats will take to indoor living but I believe most will if given the time to adjust.

I trapped these two and they wanted back outside desperately at first.

kandr_beams.JPG

• Shane Kent
• Feb 27, 2017

I can relate to the lost sleep. It was the same for me when those two were living outside.

Now they won't go outside and have no interest with exception to looking out the windows. This is them with their older Step Brother Taz. Gazing out the window.

KittyRustyTaz

• Shane Kent
• Aug 22, 2017
• 1

Kitty Rusty Taz watching birds out back window.

I sleep very well now that they live in my house and so do they Who wouldn't want to lay on fancy pet couches opposed to some cold steel beams.

Rusty and Kitty on chairs.

• Shane Kent
• Nov 12, 2017
• 4

Rusty and Kitty on TV room chairs.

 

[trudy1]

How does it react when you’re in the room with him just sitting and reading or talking softly? You could try treats as a reward. From my experience you need to be really patient with him/her. The rewards are worth it. That first raised tail greeting, first head butt, all worth the price of admission and as they say. Remember you have at least three weeks of cold nights, no sleep of worry invested, at least.
I think lots of time we consider “life outside” for cats as the ideal and somehow you are depriving them by bringing them inside. But that’s never the case in my 10 year experience. Even though they are fed they are also preyed upon, shot, chased, attacked, bred if female and such is their real world. All we see most of the time is that cute bunch of cats that come to eat, groom, and for that slim moment maybe relax.

Keep the faith. The little guy/girl will come around. If he was really hating you he would have flown out of that trap and every time you opened the door tried to escape. I think there is hope. Many on this forum have a great deal of knowledge on this subject. The best part is they really care and know what you are going through both mentally and physically. Enuf said!

 

[houseofnine]

I've trapped and brought home 3 cats. An additional feral was given to me by a friend. The 1st one was a senior and responded quickly to me. I believe she had a home for most of her life. I only had her 7 months before she passed unexpectedly. I miss her every day. One adopted me. I believe he was more stray than feral, too. Last week I trapped and caught a cat I've been fretting over for a month. With 3weeks of record cold I lost sleep. I did what other forms suggested. Fed it same time, same place every day. Skipped feeding it the day before I trapped it to insure it would be hungry enough to enter the trap. Worked in 5 minutes. It's been isolated in my master bathroom and it immediately used litter box. Does that mean it was once a pet? It's been a week and it still won't let me near it. Should I release it after it's vet check/neutering (spaying, not sure of sex)? Today it meowed for the first time. I want to give it a safe, warm home but only if it's happy. I can live with it hating me...I have a dog lol. It doesn't need to like me to stay, but if it misses it's life outside how can I tell? I want to do right by this cat. Please advise me how I can tell what's best.

Hello Kimmo, and welcome to TCS!
I'm going to try to sell you on keeping this kitty and domesticating him or her . I'll keep this post short as possible (ha). We live in suburban Connecticut and have TWELVE indoor cats. We have 4 totally domestic residents, and 3 semiferal adults and some of their offspring. First Feral, Hanna, showed up with her 4 kittens July 2013. We'd seen this cat off and on for 2-3 years--assumed she was a neighbor's cat. With help, everyone was trapped. Kits were 4 wks old..Hanna we guessed was 3 years old. Kittens warmed up to us right away--we kept them with mom til they were weaned. She was cool about our holding them, and babies were friendly from Day One. Kept everybody--massive Foster Fail. =)
Hanna was a tough one..never mean, but just scared. Would hiss or swat if we tried to pet her. The vet dismissed her as totally feral. We ignored them and kept her indoors. She got used to it and she was able to see her babies grow up. It took 2 years, but my husband can pet her--I can't, but that's okay. She is a really sweet cat and gets along fine with everyone (I've heard that is true of ferals--not so great with people, but usually fine with other cats as long as all are neutered).
Next batch of cats June 2017: small calico Marlee showed up with 3 kittens and her baby daddy. (Daddy has Highlander "lynx" ears, and one kitten does too--see my avatar). These kittens were 8-10 weeks old. Initially we brought everyone in except feral Daddy--who got fixed & now lives indoor-outdoor at rescue lady's house since we've had a coyote visitor. The kittens were kinda hissy initially, but once weaned/separated from mom, they were friendly within a couple of days. Mama got spayed. Kept her separate in a bedroom for a while but she wanted to see what was going on in the household..so we let her out of the room and she's been really playful and fun with the group. Can pet her if careful. Two kits went to a good friend of mine.
Latest challenge is feral female #3--just captured on 1/2/18. We grabbed her before the "bomb cyclone" hit the northeast US. She had been shivering outside on our patio, and seeing her looking that miserable that was the last straw. She is scared and not too happy, but hasn't tried to kill us yet. It will be slow going.
I guess my point is that they are all different and their social development can vary based on personality and how they were raised--when taken from mom, etc. I know 12 cats in 1600 sq ft is a little nutty, but we've made it work, and it's much calmer at our house than one might expect. If you're very careful with the introductions, it will be okay between your dog and the kitty.
You're doing a great thing by caring and trying to help. Three cheers for you!

 

[houseofnine]

KimmoKat1

Ignore any and all feelings of guilt. The cat might hate you at first but they get over it once they learn how good life indoors is. With that said, not all cats will take to indoor living but I believe most will if given the time to adjust.

I trapped these two and they wanted back outside desperately at first.

kandr_beams.JPG

• Shane Kent
• Feb 27, 2017

I can relate to the lost sleep. It was the same for me when those two were living outside.

Now they won't go outside and have no interest with exception to looking out the windows. This is them with their older Step Brother Taz. Gazing out the window.

KittyRustyTaz

• Shane Kent
• Aug 22, 2017
• 1

Kitty Rusty Taz watching birds out back window.

I sleep very well now that they live in my house and so do they Who wouldn't want to lay on fancy pet couches opposed to some cold steel beams.

Rusty and Kitty on chairs.

• Shane Kent
• Nov 12, 2017
• 4

Rusty and Kitty on TV room chairs.

Shane Kent : I LOVE THIS! wow. =) =)

 

[KimmoKat1]

Thanks for the words of hope!
I still have kitty, still no vet visit. The vet said as long as kitty is eating and using litter box, etc no hurry to bring it on in yet, and another trapping would set me back to square one.
I can't touch it yet so still no idea of gender. It doesn't hide any more when I enter the room, and approaches to within 5-6 feet. It plays under the door with my other cats and just yesterday played a game of push and pull with a catnip mouse under the door lol. I feel like this cat is worth the time & effort. The regret has passed, mostly. Now I'm feeling hopeful. It's started grooming itself and has put on a bit of weight and looks fantastic. I'll keep you updated but still, good vibes and prayers would be appreciated!

 

[KimmoKat1]

Shane Kent : I LOVE THIS! wow. =) =)

That's amazing! What great pics, and makes me even more determined to give kitty a great and safe life!

 

[KimmoKat1]

Great news today! I was sitting on the side of my big garden tub in my master bath, waiting for the tub to fill & reading to new cat (that's it's name so far, lol). It came out of it's safety"nook" tapped me on the leg and ran a few feet away, then sat quietly and watched/listened. I believe it's a she and she's coming into heat. Another reason I'm anxious to get it/her to the vet. A girl who uses this vet says they make house calls but I feel like anything I do now might set me back to square one. I feel like losing her trust now I'd never regain it.
Do y'all think waiting awhile before an exam is the best course?

 

[Ladysnuggable]

In my freetime I catch fix and socialize ferals its difficult with older ferals but totally possible. Feeding and talking to them are your weapons of choice. Every feeding which should be 2 to 3 a day to keep contact consistent should also involve you sitting down and just talking or reading they are prey animals and need to know you are no threat. It took us two months with boots he was the longest for us so far. He also became the most grateful and loving. Every day he cuddles with me or my boyfriend he's even warmed up to our other cats and sleeps in the kitty pile.
It's all about persistence and being consistent! I wish you the best of luck!! Please keep updated!

 

[Shane Kent]

Great news today! I was sitting on the side of my big garden tub in my master bath, waiting for the tub to fill & reading to new cat (that's it's name so far, lol). It came out of it's safety"nook" tapped me on the leg and ran a few feet away, then sat quietly and watched/listened. I believe it's a she and she's coming into heat. Another reason I'm anxious to get it/her to the vet. A girl who uses this vet says they make house calls but I feel like anything I do now might set me back to square one. I feel like losing her trust now I'd never regain it.
Do y'all think waiting awhile before an exam is the best course?

With Kitty and Rusty, a vet visit was required right away as they had upper respiratory and eye infections. They went to the vet several times in the first few weeks. Seeing they went to the vet as soon as I trapped them I figured why not get it all over and done with so after respiratory and eye infections cleared they got shots and then spay and neuter. I felt it would be best to get all the trauma of vet visits over and then focus hard on socializing them. They really didn't seem to mind going to the vet after the first few visits, I think I was very fortunate. I got everything out of the way instead of spacing it out. A whole bunch of stress (trapped, vet visits, forced to stay in a safe room, big scary human, etc.) followed by a whole bunch of relaxation. Instead of stress, relax, stress, relax, stress...