Extremely Aggressive 18mnth Old

[Bright2017]

About 8 months ago lily started to attack me, never my partner, quite badly. I thought maybe it was because she was desperate to go outside. She's now had her shots but not been neutered yet as I've recently been the victim of identity theft, unfortunate but there's not alot I can do until my account is restored!
I was about to get into bed the other night and she did her usual rubbing on my legs etc before jumping on the bed. She sat right where I needed to sit so I picked her to move her a few inches. She wrapped all 4 legs and her mouth around my forearm, I couldn't drop her because her claws and teeth were dug right in.....so her being allowed out hasn't done much, I don't think it's frustration. There doesn't seem to be any trigger at all! She's been chased by bigger cats in the area the last few days too and now hisses and growls at me if I happen to be breathing the same air, I get that's probably because she's pissed at the other cat and not me but I'm also 8 months pregnant and I can't have this behaviour around a newborn. I don't know what to try and her vet wasn't much help

 

[Yanaka]

She's not fixed and she goes outside?
Dear lord. Change that, first--please!

Then, I don't know. I read a lot about animals changing their behavior around pregnant owners, but I don't know how true that is. Please don't surrender her to a shelter, though.

 

[Yanaka]

I just re-read your post. Your cat is clearly being chased by males to mate. Why are you letting her out if she isn't fixed? Do not let her outside anymore until she's spayed!

 

[Bright2017]

Like I said, identity theft. Someone stole my bank details and every penny I have. Literally nothing I can do about it and trust my I've explored every option. I had no intention of breeding, I've always rescued!

 

[Yanaka]

Like I said, identity theft. Someone stole my bank details and every penny I have. Literally nothing I can do about it and trust my I've explored every option. I had no intention of breeding, I've always rescued!

So why does she go outside? She's intact. She will mate.

 

[Bright2017]

One of the cats is a neighbours and is female.

She was climbing out a top window before she'd had her 2nd lot of jabs, found out when I went to wash the marks off the inside only top realise they were on the outside! Damage would have already been done and at the time she was booked in to be neutered in 2 weeks

 

[Yanaka]

Goodness. It doesn't matter which cat you see, or if the damage "would have already been done." She's not fixed and she's outside, and you're just lucky it hasn't already happened.... It's irresponsible. You only see that female cat, but there are other feral/stray cats...

Please keep her inside while you get the card situation fixed.

Anyway--to your other problem, I want to say that cats are really complex. If it's just started, it might really be your hormones and she might not recognize you. I don't think she will hurt the baby as long as you respect her space and don't put them in her face... She won't purposefully attack a baby.

 

[Bright2017]

Thankyou for the judgemental comment, you've been so helpful. I obviously had no idea of the consequences...

 

[Yanaka]

I obviously had no idea of the consequences...

So you know :/
Luckily you can get her fixed when she's at the beginning of a pregnancy, let's just hope your card stuff gets fixed in time.

 

[Bright2017]

I'm just trying to deal with my current situation as best I can, it sucks and the timing is awful! As soon as I'm able she'll be down the vets

 

[auntie]

I don’t think it makes sense to act so judgmental and horrified about someone else’s cat, especially if you want them to take you seriously. Maybe respectfully addressing the problem would come closer to having the desired effect.

Anyway I just popped in to say that lots of shelters offer spay/neuter clinics for people without the means to go to a veterinarian’s office

 

[Bright2017]

I don’t think it makes sense to act so judgmental and horrified about someone else’s cat, especially if you want them to take you seriously. Maybe respectfully addressing the problem would come closer to having the desired effect.

Anyway I just popped in to say that lots of shelters offer spay/neuter clinics for people without the means to go to a veterinarian’s office

Thankyou. She's actually booked to go in on Monday morning. Definitely won't be posting again though as I got no help with my actual problem!

 

[auntie]

Don’t give up quite yet! This forum can be extremely helpful, depending on who sees your post...try tagging C calicosrspecial for example next time. Not everyone is as judgy as that other person.

I find it really comforting to know I can ask cat questions here—cats are complicated, and there’s only so many questions my vet can stand! And you know how it is...with that little baby, you’ll need all the help you can get. Congratulations!!!

 

[Bright2017]

Thank-you! I'm due in just over 2 weeks We picked this little cat up 4 days after I had a miscarriage last August, I would feel awful if we had to rehome her or we somehow inadvertently encouraged this aggressive behaviour as she helped both of us deal with that situation. She is the funniest, cutest little thing and she can be very affectionate but the random attacks are so confusing

 

[kristenann]

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. No one should have to be afraid of their kitty! I'm not sure if it'll help your situation but when my kitten thinks I look like a good toy (read claws and nails) I scream like a banshee. Usually that is enough for him to realize he is hurting me.

If he continues to attack I hiss like a cat. If he doesn't immediately stop I grab his scruff hold him down for a couple seconds and angrily hiss at him then I let him go. He always runs off after this. I never actually lift him off the ground by his scruff either so it doesn't hurt him.

But I like to teach a cat the way a momma cat would. They need to learn that they are hurting you and you don't want to play with them then.

On the flip side interactive play for a healthy outlet for their energy is also super important. Try for at least twice a day until she is panting.

Good luck!

 

[Bright2017]

I've tried doing things like that, we realised early on that she was a mini panther (she's black) and we think her dad was feral so the aggression may well be part of her personality. I've had cats before, one was extremely cuddly and the other was a total bitch, I learnt the warning signs but with this one there's nothing. I play with her until she lays down, I rarely approach her to give affection, I don't bother her when she's quiet etc etc. It can't be fear because we've never been physically threatening towards her. I guess I just have to see if having her neutered on Monday will have any effect!

 

[calicosrspecial]

I am happy to try to help.

I would like to learn more about the attacks. What happened leading up to them, did the bite draw blood. Any additional details.

Cats take on our emotions and pregnancies obviously change our emotions so that could be a big part of this change in her behavior. In addition you are going through the incredible stress of identity theft and the resulting financial issues. I am guessing your stress level is extremely high and the cat feels that and gets more on edge.

Play is really important. It helps build confidence and burns energy. So there are some big advantages. With you about to have a child it will be hard for you to play but if your partner can play with the cat that could be helpful. After a good play session feed either treats or a meal. Also, try to create a few warm and comfy places she can hang out in. Places were see can just get away a bit, relax, and hang out. Finally just let her know she is loved. Try to be as calm and confident with her as possible. Talk softly and lovingly. Don't reach out to her at all, never reach from above her or stand over her. Try to give her treats or her food to associate yourself with something very positive (as long as you are not at risk of being hurt in anyway). Try not to look directly at her if you sense she is a bit different, give her eye kisses if you feel safe and that she will not attack you (close your eyes slowly hold closed for 5 seconds then open them slowly). But most of all just don't put yourself at risk in anyway. Just give the cat space and if she rubs just let her rub and stay as calm as possible (very important as cats take on our emotions) and don't reach for her.

I deal with ferals and have learned that my emotions are really important in how they react to me. If I am calm and confident and act like there is no issue the cat typically relaxes. I have seen people get nervous around cats and they pick up on that and get defensive.

I would like to learn more about the way the attacks happen and the intensity. I am guessing she is picking up on the stress so is on edge a bit. It is a little hard to explain but I hope you understand what I mean.

I deal with a lot of cats (ferals) and cats really don't want to hurt us, if one does lash out it is usually because of something I did causing them to feel threatened (even though my intent was never to hurt them they don't always understand.

Don't worry, we will get through this. Please update us and share any information and I think we will get through this. I think it is mainly a stress driven issue but I will have a better idea after I understand the situation better. Just give her some space and try to be as calm and confident around her as possible and if your partner can help in play etc that would be great.

Please ask anything anytime, I am happy to help you through this. We will get through this, she was good before I am highly confident she will be good again. Thank you for sticking by her.

 

[Bright2017]

I don't approach her, I know she likes her space. She gets attention when she asks for it. I almost never pick her up. She's most active at night so that's when we play. She likes chasing screwed up bits of paper, she has a laser pen and feather chase toys.

Regarding the attacks, I didn't notice it as much when she was little because you know...kittens. She draws blood every time. The last time she had her whole mouth around my hand, was moving her head side to side to try and do as much damage as she could. She was sat where I was about to sit on the bed so I just tried to move her over a bit. Other incidents I can't say what the trigger might have been. I was sat talking to my partner and had no idea she was actually in the room, another time I had my hand on the arm of the sofa and the time before that I scratched my leg whilst reading in bed.

We have a very calm house as it's just myself and my partner. We don't have many friends over because we haven't lived in the area for long. We don't yell at each other or argue much at all. I've not been stressed at all this pregnancy as we made the decision for me not to work as stress was a factor in our loss last year.

I'm ok with accommodating her but a handsy toddler might not fair so well and my partner will absolutely not tolerate any aggression towards the baby.

 

[calicosrspecial]

Is it always on the hand?

Your partner never has this issue?

I am wondering if she is associating your hand with a toy or prey. What do you think?

Is she stalking at all? Staring? What is her body language like?

I really want to step up play and make sure there is no association of a hand with play or being a toy. I want your partner to do this as I don't want you at risk of being bitten as you are so close to delivering and we don't want you to get an infection. So get her to really focus on the toy ( the bird in Da Bird, etc), If she starts focusing on the hand see if your partner can distract her by calling her name, anything to get her focus off the hand (and keep the hand still if she is focused).

Also, I would like to you to make sure your hand is not perceived as a toy or prey. So if she starts focusing on your hand try to distract her by calling her name. Don't let your hand act like prey or a toy.

When you see her do you worry about her attacking at all? Do you tense up or walk differently at all? Any change in your emotions when she is near or if you think she might do something?

We are going to have to start another thread for help with introducing a cat to a toddler as I am not well versed on that. This is going to be very important.

After you have the baby we will start doing some positive association with your hand using food but only after you have the baby as I don't want you or the baby to be at risk.