Tommorrow we take Elmer to cross the rainbow bridge. My heart breaks as I write this and anytime that I think about him not being around. He is about 15 years old, was rescued from a shelter and has been a great companion for many years. Why does this have to be so hard? I keep telling myself it is for the best, that if I was in his condition I would not want to be around either, but I know that is not true, everyone wants to live even if it is not a great life. He does not understand that he is sick and wasting away and there is absoutly nothing else we can do to make him better. We have tried to give him a good home, snuggle when he will let us and tell him how much he means to us, but somehow it just does not seem like enough. I suppose nothing ever is though when it comes to this part of life. I want to call and cancel the appointment and keep him around longer but I know somewhere deep in my heart and my head, that is not the best thing for him at this point. The vet thinks he has cancer, he has thyriod problems because it is sticking out of his chest, he has diabeties, he is so skinny you can feel every single backbone among others and his fur stopped growing back where he has been shaved. At his last weigh in he has lost a half pound, considering how much he weighs and used to weigh, that is not a good thing either.
What really sucks besides the loss of course, is that the vet never found anything "wrong" as often as we took him in for all sorts of tests. He apparently is a very "healthy" yet extreamly "sick" kitty. I guess I will never understand how he can pass so many of the tests he was given and still be so bad off. I do not feel any better from writing this, I kind of hoped it would help some. I know this is going to hurt for a long long time and I hope so much I am able to continue to look at his picture without feeling so sad.
Given a choice however, I would not go back in time and give him up so I did not have to feel this way now. His life has brought joy to mine and I hope we gave him the same. I hope he remembers BooBoo Kitty when he crosses over and they are better friends on the other side then they were in our home. At least he will have some new cat friends to play with and never have to worry about anything again. Everyone please wish him well on his last day with us and wish us well for tommorrow please, we are going to need it. We love you Elmer, please never forgot us because we will never forget you.
What really sucks besides the loss of course, is that the vet never found anything "wrong" as often as we took him in for all sorts of tests. He apparently is a very "healthy" yet extreamly "sick" kitty. I guess I will never understand how he can pass so many of the tests he was given and still be so bad off. I do not feel any better from writing this, I kind of hoped it would help some. I know this is going to hurt for a long long time and I hope so much I am able to continue to look at his picture without feeling so sad.
Given a choice however, I would not go back in time and give him up so I did not have to feel this way now. His life has brought joy to mine and I hope we gave him the same. I hope he remembers BooBoo Kitty when he crosses over and they are better friends on the other side then they were in our home. At least he will have some new cat friends to play with and never have to worry about anything again. Everyone please wish him well on his last day with us and wish us well for tommorrow please, we are going to need it. We love you Elmer, please never forgot us because we will never forget you.