Drawing blood while playing

[withoutaname]

My cat's teeth are getting sharper, and as a result my arms look worse than ever before. It's a good thing that it's so cold, because I have to wear sleeves so no one will get the wrong idea. At parties I have to count on the place to be dark, or I have to end up wearing sleeves there as well. 

He doesn't bite to hurt me, but to play. 

He hasn't been with other cats, so he hasn't been taught the boundaries like other cats would have.

Up to when he was a month, he would cry if I didn't let him suck on my fingers or lips. Until he was around three months he needed to bite my hand to sleep, especially when he was stressed. I don't know if all of this is linked to his biting now. 

I have tried:

Yelling in pain. I tried to make the noise similar to the sound of a cat in pain. This seemed to make him happy.....

Biting him back. If I did it lightly, he wouldn't care or he would bite my face instead. If I did it harder I would yell out in pain, and then continue biting me.

Blowing in his face. This always makes him act more aggressive. 

Leaving the room and close the door. This is not so easy, because who wants to get up and leave their bedroom when their half asleep... And usually it's hard to get up and leave a room when he just follows me and jumps me. When I've finally pushed him aside, run and closed the door, he just meows and as soon as I open the door he jumps me. I can of course be gone longer, and then he won't to this, but that's probably because he forgets what happened, and won't that kind of ruin the point? 

It hurt so much. When he get a hold of the bone it feels like his going to break it. But that's not the problem. Yes, it hurt, but what worries me is the marks he leaves... 

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• withoutaname
• Feb 22, 2014

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• withoutaname
• Feb 22, 2014

Any ideas? 

 

[ondine]

He's gotten used to seeing your hands as a plaything and needs retraining.  As with all learned behavior, it will take him more time to "unlearn" it than it did for him to learn it.

So, beginning NOW, no more playing with your hands.  If he goes for them, a sharp hiss and "NO!" will get his attention.  You might even get a can of air (the kind they use to dust off computers).  A short squirt from that will help ensure he understands this is no longer acceptable.

Hitting him won't work - he has no clue why you did that and won't connect it to his behavior.

This is going to take time and consistency.  Anytime he goes for your hands in a rough manner, you need to stop playing immediately.  If you don't have a wand toy or laser light, get one and use that instead.

Good luck!

 

[withoutaname]

We have wands and a lot of stuff like that. But when he's in a "play fighting" mood, he only wants my hands...

What about water? Would that work, or should I just use air? I'm just scared it's going to have the same effect as when I blow :O

This might be a stupid question, but why won't it help with biting him? Of course I already know it doesn't, because I tried it, but I mean logically. I thought that since cats do this, I should be able to do it as well.. 

 

[ondine]

I don't think they get that you're biting back means stop.  If his sibling bit him back, it would just escalate the play.

If he doesn't want to play with the wand toy, then he can't play period.  Sometimes us mothers have to be firm!

Spraying water might work but I am uncomfortable with that.  The canned air will definitely make him pause, then you say "No" and walk away.  He'll get it eventually.

 

[maloos]

 
This might be a stupid question, but why won't it help with biting him? Of course I already know it doesn't, because I tried it, but I mean logically. I thought that since cats do this, I should be able to do it as well.. 

I don't think it would be wise biting your cat. No matter how clean he is, your body could still get some unwanted hair or what not and get into trouble dealing with it.

 

[MoochNNoodles]

 
He's gotten used to seeing your hands as a plaything and needs retraining.  As with all learned behavior, it will take him more time to "unlearn" it than it did for him to learn it.

So, beginning NOW, no more playing with your hands.  If he goes for them, a sharp hiss and "NO!" will get his attention.  You might even get a can of air (the kind they use to dust off computers).  A short squirt from that will help ensure he understands this is no longer acceptable.

Hitting him won't work - he has no clue why you did that and won't connect it to his behavior.

This is going to take time and consistency.  Anytime he goes for your hands in a rough manner, you need to stop playing immediately.  If you don't have a wand toy or laser light, get one and use that instead.

Good luck!

You could also give him a stuffed toy or a kickeroo to wrestle with. http://www.thecatsite.com/products/kong-kickeroo-catnip-toy

Many cats do not respond well to negative reinforcement; traditional discipline.  In some ways; they are harder to retrain than dogs.  At least in my experience.  These articles may have something else in them to help: http://www.thecatsite.com/a/cats-and-discipline-dont-mix; http://www.thecatsite.com/a/playtime-aggression

Sometimes retraining is also trail by error.  For instance; you already know that blowing in his face makes him more aggressive.  At this point I think redirection and consistency are what you need most.  Things like wand toys, the laser pointer, da bird or the cat dancer really help them get their energy out without hurting you.  Unfortunately; nothing is going to stop him overnight.  He has a wrestle/prey drive by instinct. He just needs to learn what the right outlet for it is.

When M&N were kittens we had them crate trained with a large dog kennel.  I didn't have many issues with aggression; possibly because they played that way with each other.  But it was a safe place they were familiar with both for sleeping and while we were at work.  I had a fish tank they needed to keep out of and things like that.  It's also a good place for them to learn to chill.  It is more traditional discipline like; but you need to not be chased out of your own bed if your kitty decides that's when he wants to play rough with your hands.  M&N had all they needed in there.  I honestly don't remember at what age we stopped crating them.

Hope that helps some!

 

[mservant]

 
I don't think they get that you're biting back means stop.  If his sibling bit him back, it would just escalate the play.

If he doesn't want to play with the wand toy, then he can't play period.  Sometimes us mothers have to be firm!

Spraying water might work but I am uncomfortable with that.  The canned air will definitely make him pause, then you say "No" and walk away.  He'll get it eventually.

This seems tough but I agree with Ondine:  your little cat has not had a cat-mom or cat siblings to learn social rules from and he needs to learn them from you.  He is a kitten and he has endless energy, and he is hard wired to explore and test out his world just like any child would, and do this in any way he is allowed to.  You are doing an amazing thing by raising him and teaching him all the things he needs to learn but it is a very hard job to do. My boy had no siblings but he was very lucky to have a very patient fur-mom who raised him to 15 weeks.  He still had to be tought some very firm lessons about playing with humans though and would bite hard when excited.

Ondine is right in saying he should learn what is  and is not OK to do but that it will take time and consistency.  It is important too that he learns this in a way that is not frightening or threatening for him.  Using things like spraying water, loud rattling cans, slapping or biting back or sudden moves are likely to be interpreted by your cat as aggressive and probably make his behaviour more aggressive rather than less, and also an anxious cat afraid of you.  Blowing air is a more natural cat experience and can help stop them in their tracks if they are biting if you use it sparingly but it does not work for all cats.

It is important he learns not to bite and scratch people.  Biting and scratching do not just leave unsightly marks and cause discomfort or pain, they risk serious harm and life and limb threatening infections due to the bacteria cats carry on their claws and  teeth.  If these bacteria are present and get in to a deep / puncture wound very serious infection and blood poisoning can happen which needs rapid medical attention.

Please try to persist with gaining his interest in non-physical contact play such as chasing, fetch, catching paper airplanes or biscuits, fishing rod toys or wands, and toy mice.  Also wand toys that have the connection to you but not touching you. The Kickeroo that Ondine has mentioned is good for getting closer but you have to be careful he does not get confused and keep his paw and tooth contact to the toy at all times.   Wand and fishing rod toys, esp DaBird, that you can keep your own physical movement to a minimum while teasing with the toy might be best, or engaging in hide and seek chase games where you take turns chasing each other and reward with a biscuit or snack rather than his biting or jumping on to you.  The laser toy is good as long as you reward with another toy or a little food at the end so he knows the game has finished.

Stick to the 'OW', slightly push in towards him, and then freeze and don't move if he does bite or bunny kick - remove him gently if he is breaking the skin and then remove him or you from the room. Give it about a minute, to 3 minutes for the cool down and increase in small increments if he has not calmed down so he gets the point.

The only other thing I'll add right  now is try to get him to play as much as you can in between his sleep so he is tired out as if his energy builds up he will be far more likely to launch at you as seems to be happening now.

Continue with  patience and firmness, and  

.  

 

[ondine]

I did want to make sure I didn't sound like you should blow the air at him.  Point the can away from him when you squirt it.  The sound will catch his attention.  The air blowing on him will only ratchet things up.  Sorry for the confusion!

 

[catwoman707]

The first thing I think of is the second he bites, give a sharp NO! and at the same time shove him away and then totally ignore him for a few minutes. If you're in bed, do this and cover your head with the blanket.

Don't look at or say another word to him. Kittens hate this.

Over and over until he connects that play stops when he bites and will soon enough associate the 2.

It's just lack of learning play skills properly when he was a little kid

This is what litters of kittens in the wrestlemania mode is. Pounce and attack, one gets too rough biting and the other one screams so he lets up, then the screamer goes after him and so on.

 

[withoutaname]

I will try to follow all your advises, but I'm just so weak that it's going to be really hard to not give up! If you have some more tips, just keep them coming

 

[mservant]

 
I will try to follow all your advises, but I'm just so weak that it's going to be really hard to not give up! If you have some more tips, just keep them coming

If you follow the advice like a star student until your boy learns what hurts you, what the human rules are so no one gets hurt, you will find it pays off for both of you.  Honestly. No pain no gain, but the pain of limiting the play is not permenant.  It has a purpose and that purpose is to make the play even more fun for both of you. 

Mouse thinks that either he is human or I am a big cat but he definitely doesn't respect the difference in our size or have any natural fear of me which means he will launch himself at me any time it takes his fancy. I think your cat may have a similar kind of self identity to Mouse. 

One fully grown medium size cat can do a large amount of damage to a fully grown medium large human unintentionally when playing....  I love the physical play and I love seeing Mouse happy but I also know he can hurt me and I can hurt him if the rules of the game are not clear to him.  

Once the rules and boundaries have been learned you can play with your cat again but stop the claws being out or the hard biting happening.  But you have to be firm and consistent to show him what hurts you first, and learn how to handle him if they get over excited - which he will.

Hands, arms, legs, feet, and faces are not for biting or scratching and if he does the games stops.  Once he knows this, if he wants to play he will play by the rules unless he gets over excited and then you use the basic rules to get him to calm down and start play again.  Simple!