Does My 9 Month Old Cat Dislike Me

[Minxrat]

I've had Poppy since she was 8 weeks old. She suddenly started being unaffectionate at about 4 months and is now 9 months old. She won't sit on my lap, she doesn't like being picked up (although tolerates it) and sometimes runs away from me. it really upsets me when she just lies under the bed out of my reach or on the floor on the other side of the room just staring. I have to bribe her up on the bed mostly. The only time she wants a cuddle is every night between 1 and 3am when she climbs on me, lies full length and I'm allowed to stroke her and croon to her and then she jumps off like nothing happened - sometimes I get it twice! I have Milo (3 months) who she has taken to very well and he is more affectionate although I think this makes her jealous? I've had him since end November.

I've heard about the ignoring thing where I don't touch her and wait for her to come to me but it's hard - she's always chirruping for attention - and also I don't want to play with Milo and ignore her (although she seems to have forgotten how to play). Anyone think I should try this technique?

Any help would be great - I'm starting to think she may be better off in a different household and that just upsets me. Btw I live on my own and work all day, hence getting Milo.

 

[Willowy]

She's a teenager, and may not be a particularly clingy cat. Don't push her---cats don't respond well to that---just give her space to decide what she wants to do. She may become more affectionate as she gets older. Is she spayed?

What makes you think she would be better in a different home?

 

[ArtNJ]

It is like courting. You need to figure out what she likes and when she likes it, and only do that. It is not that you need to ignore her, you just need to pay really close attention, try different things, and never force her onto your lap or into your arms. But if she is sleepy in her favorite spot, you can try a slow approach and gentle petting. If she likes that, you can try luring her there. If the favorite spot is a cat tree, after you establish its ok for petting there, you can try to expand to a dresser. That sort of thing.

Since she likes getting on you when you are lying down, try lying on your couch and luring her in with clicking (or whatever your call noise is) and if need be treats. In other words, you are paying attention, doing what she likes, but gradually expanding it. That is why I call it the courting model.

And she may expand on her own if you are patient. My cat likes to lie on the chest too. So now when I try and strech out on the floor for a run, I sometimes get a cat on me lol.