Dental trouble or mouth cancer?

[jil05]

My cat went over the rainbow bridge on Tuesday but I can't get rid of my guilt.
He's always had bad teeth but recently they got worse. He had a slow heart rate so could not go under anesthesia. His blood work showed white blood count up, early kidney disease. He received a shot of covenia but it didn't help. Brought him back and gave him transdermal pain meds.brought him back again and another shot of covenia without looking at him but no pain meds.
Signs and symptoms were excessive drooling, obvious pain. But now blood in mouth and front tooth hanging loosely.
Changed vets and he looked at him as best as he could because mouth was so messy at this point and said this is cancer. You should put him to sleep. I asked if he was sure and he said definitely. The first vet had been able to look in his mouth only a month ago and said just bad teeth. Unfortunately this vet had no solution so I had o find a hospital that would do it.
When asked whether cancer or not she declined to say without tests.
Did I do the right thing? Without knowing for sure? He still had an appetite but he was in a lot of pain. I don't have much money so to get a cardiologist to look at him again to see if he could go under was just too much money.
I'm sorry this is long. I'm up and can't sleep and the guilt is tremendous.
Thank you all.

 

[heatherwillard0614]

First, i want to say i am so sorry about your little guy. May I ask his name and how old he was?
I don't have a response as to what it may or may not have been. I just want to say that it sounds like you did what you could for him. I know it is hard not knowing if you did the right thing or not. It sounds like he was in a lot of pain and the one vet was pretty certain of the diagnosis. Even if he was 100 percent sure it was cancer i doubt that without tests being done so you could have the proof in your hands to see the results I still think you would have your doubts. I know I would. I would be second guessing it all just as it seems you are. Just know he knew you loved him and he loved you!!
He will always be with you wherever you go keep him in your heart.
Again I am so sorry for your loss. It is truly never easy. Even if you had a diagnosis and you had to have him pts a few months down the line I think you would still wonder if it was too soon or too late. You can't think of that (I know easier said than done) he wants you to keep all the great memories you guys had and hold on to that.

Also do not apologize for the length of your post. It could have been 10 times longer if that is how you felt and needed to vent then so be it. You are grieving do not apologize for that.

 

[jil05]

Thank you so much for your reply.
His name was Larry and he was about 16 or 17 years old. After caring for a feral colony for many years he was my last to take care of. The Cat Site was there the whole time for me with advice with each one. Athough it's been a while since I've been on, I so appreciate you all!
I suppose that's what makes this so hard.
He was the little black and white runt of them all, always following me all around and listening to my silly little chatter.
He was such a marvelous little guy.
My heart is truly broken.
Thank you all.

 

[heatherwillard0614]

First Larry had a long, happy life and i guarantee he knew he was loved, and you can best believe he loved you. I know it is going to be hard but if you can try to write down or type up what it was like from the time Larry was a little baby throughout his adult life. Include pictures througout his life, cute things he did, toys he loved, what kind of schedule he had. I have done this when I lost my esa and while I was typing it up it was hard I cried a lot. That being said I have a nice long little personal story about Akira. I included a lot of little things that she did just so I'd never forget, what her favorite things were to do throighoit the day and reading it years later I can sit back and smile knowing she had a great life that was full of love.

This is if you want to. I only suggest to do so to help realize how great his life was and to give you an idea of little things that he did that showed that he knew he was loved to the fullest.

I will say this was hard to do but was one of the best things I have done. You will get to the point after a while where it will hurt a little less but to get to that point is going to take a lot of time.

In my opinion this was the easiest thing that I found help me to know she knew she was loved to the fullest and I think if you do it you will find the same and also see that you did everything you could for Larry and thay you should not feel bad or doubt the decision that was made. You made it in the best interest of him.

 

[di and bob]

You did what you could with what you had. At that age, which is very geriatric, you have to know you did what was kind and done out of love, to end his pain and suffering. Something like this does not get better, and with his problems it WOULD have been traumatic and would come with more suffering and fear. Guilt ALWAYS accompanies grieving. If you would have put him through surgery, all the fear and suffering, you would have felt guilty about that. You gave him everything he wanted in life, someone to care for and love him. Try to concentrate on the good memories, I'm sure there are many more. In time your grief will turn to gratitude for having him in your life, but for now, you have a huge hole in your heart that takes a long time to heal.
What you are going through is a part of grieving, and time is the only thing that dulls the sharp edges. Go forward into the future and try to seek happiness and more love. As you would have wanted for him to move on if you were the first to go. That is love and he wants no less. Do not let grief control your life or your heart. The love you shared is too important to turn into something sad.
He is at peace now, because he carries your love forever in his heart. He lives on through you now, so don't send him endless tears and grief. Thank him for sharing your life's journey. His age is a tribute to your care and love, and now you honor him by remembering him and mourning his passing. "Do not cry because it is over, smile because it happened".........RIP precious Larry. You will always be remembered, you will have a secure place in a loving heart for eternity. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rest you gentIe, Larry, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

GuiIt is so naturaI to humans. We aII do it. But...remember this...you said everything necessary when you said "in a Iot of pain." Cats are masters at hiding pain, so if he was showing it, he was in agony. His physicaI condition (age, etc) meant that you couId not have done the necessary work on his mouth to give him any degree of comfort. Now you have done the hardest thing we ever have to do, you have put the good of a beIoved famiIy member before your own heartbreak, and heIped him to cross the Gate between This Adventure and her Next Great Adventure. You sent your Iove with him to guide him on his way. This is the Deepest Truth I know, that love never dies, it is translated and purified into Love, and continues on. Now, from his home in That Place Where All Things Are Known, Larry blesses you, and he sends his Love back to walk beside you down through all of your day. Because Love abides. Always and forever, Love abides.

 

[marshmallow2013]

I’m so sorry for your loss. About 9 months ago I lost my 12 year guy to oral cancer. He declined in less than a week. He was still wanting to eat just like your Larry, but was unable to. My vet didn’t do a biopsy but told me it was most likely squamous cell carcinoma because it grows very fast. Bad breath and little drooling was his only noticea symptoms for about 3 days prior. I had only a weekend to say goodbye.
You didn’t let Larry suffer. Even though it was so hurtful, you made the best and kindest choice for him. My deepest condolences to you.