Cremation or burial and why?

[claire98909]

Hi, I have an 8-year-old kitty who was diagnosed yesterday with intestinal carcinoma.  We have decided to let nature run its course instead of doing surgery and chemo, but are giving her prednisolone to make her more comfortable.  She has about 3 months, but if she significantly worsens at any time we will put her to rest.

I'm wondering, for those of who who have experienced losing your pets (this is my first time and honestly I'm terrified of how in grief I already am), whether you went for cremation or burial, and why you chose what you did.

Thanks,

Claire

 

[pinkdagger]

I'm so sorry to hear about your cat.

I've only dealt with birds in the past, but I had all three at the vet when their time came (one was an emergency and she died there, two were put to sleep). I went with cremation for all three. I didn't want to bury them because our area used to have a lot of wildlife, and the last thing I wanted was for them to be unearthed accidentally (whether it was a result of flooding, roaming animals, yardwork, construction, etc.).

I wanted that "physical" thing at first, but then I later realized how impractical it would be to carry every single urn of pets I own and would own in the future - the heartbreak if one were to get bumped or fall and shatter open. The first two, I brought the ashes home and the third, I had a communal cremation so they would spread the ashes on their cemetery grounds. One big company operates within this area of my province, so even though I went to two different vets, the same company handled it all - I've also seen this company advertised for grieving pet owners at other vet's offices.

I know some people, especially if they own their property will opt for burial. For smaller animals, if people like having plants around, I know they've found it symbolic to bury their pet's remains in a potted plant and let something like a tree grow from it. I don't know anyone who has chosen a burial in a pet cemetery, but just like with people, I think it offers significance if you're the type to visit often and maintain the grave site. My family visits the graves of our deceased relatives several times a year to remove dead foliage, plant new potted plants and flowers, trim the shrubs, etc. I would say a pet cemetery would be most worthwhile if you're this type of person who will commit to this kind of stuff - it's very sad to see the graves of those who obviously haven't received visitors to tend to their graves for a long time.

Just remember to make the best of the time you have with her, and spoil her rotten.

 

[alyssam]

Very sorry for your recent diagnosis on your kitty. I hope the last months of her life are filled with love! On that note, I really like @pinkdagger's idea of having a plant of sorts grow from the ashes.

 

[di and bob]

I buried my Chrissy where she liked to lay in the sun, I guess I get a sense of her still being there when I tend to her grave. Their physical remains are just that, their souls and the essence of them have departed and will remain forever a part of you no matter where you go. I will take her headstone with me if I ever leave and cover her grave with a cement slab so she will not be disturbed. I do like the idea of cremation so I could forever have them with me, I do have hair that I keep and want to be buried with. It's a very personal choice, but no matter which way you decide to go, remember that she will be with you no matter what. 

   I'm so sorry you have to go through all this heartache, please know you are not alone in  your grief and we will do all we can to comfort and help you. It truly helps to talk to others who can support you. Spend these last few months letting your little one know how much you love her, spoil her all you can. Give her a hug and a kiss for me, I'll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers. Bless you for caring so much and please take care of yourself.........

 

[nurseangel]

I'm very sorry to hear about your cat's diagnosis.  We, too, chose not to do surgery and chemo for our sweet Paws.  All our cats that have crossed the bridge are buried next to each other in our backyard, along with our dog.  The only one missing is my beloved baby kitten...the vet wanted to do an autopsy and sent his body away for it without our permission.  

As for why we chose burial, I don't think we even made a conscious decision.  I can remember the neighborhood boys burying my Smoky for me when I was a child and was very touched by this gesture.  I still think back about their kindness, even after all these years, so maybe that's part of the reason for my choice.

My prayers are with you. 

 

[denice]

I am so sorry you are going through this.  I think it's a personal decision that is dependent on someones circumstances.  I read Jackson Galaxy's book and he did the plant thing with the kitty that was at the center of his book.  He said California required that cats be cremated before burial because of scavengers.  He buried his kitties ashes in the backyard of the beach house they were renting at the time and planted a tangerine tree over them.