- Joined
- Apr 30, 2018
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My dear 20 year old Snuggles passed away yesterday and I am broken-hearted. I decided 4 or 5 years ago, when her time came, cremation would be the best option. I even talked to Snuggles about it, and I truly believe it’s what she wanted so she can always stay close to me.
I live with my parents (I’m 23), and my elderly grandmother lives with us (I help care for her). All of us were extremely attached to Snuggles, but I was her “purrson” and she was my baby. Before she passed, I talked to the rest of our family about our wish to have her cremated. Now, my parents were raised in a small town where everyone buried their furry friends on their property- there wasn’t a pet crematorium in the area and it was pretty unheard of. Now we have moved to a large city where the option is more prevalent and popular, due to limited space and more mobile lifestyles. Everyone in the family agreed wholeheartedly that in this case, having her cremated would be the most respectful and logical option.
This afternoon I brought up something I also knew I’ve wanted to do for Snuggles, and that is have a tiny amount of her ashes cast into a beautiful silver heart pendant so I can carry some of her with me wherever I go. This is something I’ve planned to do with my own money, but since we were all close to her, I brought it up to get everyone’s feelings and opinions. My grandmother thinks it is a beautiful idea and a wonderful way to memorialize her, and has even offered to pay to have it made so she feels like she has helped toward Snuggles’ memorial in some way. She was there the first time I saw Snuggles, and has been close to her ever since. My mom, also very close to Snuggles, was the one who adopted her for me. She and I are always very honest with each other, and she told me that it wasn’t something she would be comfortable having or wearing for herself- that it wasn’t necessarily creepy to her, but more like unconventional and unsettling. She also did say that Snuggles was really my cat and it’s my business what I choose to do since it is for me and I will be the one wearing it. She said she would support the decision if I felt it was right and it would be healing for me. My Dad is more introverted when it comes to feelings, and the opinion he expressed to me was ambivalent, pretty much “if that’s what you want to do”. He loved Snuggles very much but wasn’t as bonded as us three ladies were to her. He may have a more strong opinion one way or the other, but hasn’t expressed it.
Snuggles is the first cat (or any pet for that matter) in our family that has been cremated, and this is all new territory. I know in my heart I really want to have the necklace made- that it is beautiful, respectful memorial I can have with me always. By the same token, though, my Mom’s reservation and the fact I don’t really know how my Dad feels about it, have made me reconsider- should I do this? Does anyone have any opinions or advice as to the route I should take? I know that the choice is what’s right for me, but don’t want to make anyone in the family uncomfortable and regret it after the fact. I figured some people here may have experience with having a furry friend cremated and know a bit more about this, and someone may even own a piece of cremation jewelry. I think it may help to hear from people who are not quite as emotionally invested in the situation as our family is right now.
I live with my parents (I’m 23), and my elderly grandmother lives with us (I help care for her). All of us were extremely attached to Snuggles, but I was her “purrson” and she was my baby. Before she passed, I talked to the rest of our family about our wish to have her cremated. Now, my parents were raised in a small town where everyone buried their furry friends on their property- there wasn’t a pet crematorium in the area and it was pretty unheard of. Now we have moved to a large city where the option is more prevalent and popular, due to limited space and more mobile lifestyles. Everyone in the family agreed wholeheartedly that in this case, having her cremated would be the most respectful and logical option.
This afternoon I brought up something I also knew I’ve wanted to do for Snuggles, and that is have a tiny amount of her ashes cast into a beautiful silver heart pendant so I can carry some of her with me wherever I go. This is something I’ve planned to do with my own money, but since we were all close to her, I brought it up to get everyone’s feelings and opinions. My grandmother thinks it is a beautiful idea and a wonderful way to memorialize her, and has even offered to pay to have it made so she feels like she has helped toward Snuggles’ memorial in some way. She was there the first time I saw Snuggles, and has been close to her ever since. My mom, also very close to Snuggles, was the one who adopted her for me. She and I are always very honest with each other, and she told me that it wasn’t something she would be comfortable having or wearing for herself- that it wasn’t necessarily creepy to her, but more like unconventional and unsettling. She also did say that Snuggles was really my cat and it’s my business what I choose to do since it is for me and I will be the one wearing it. She said she would support the decision if I felt it was right and it would be healing for me. My Dad is more introverted when it comes to feelings, and the opinion he expressed to me was ambivalent, pretty much “if that’s what you want to do”. He loved Snuggles very much but wasn’t as bonded as us three ladies were to her. He may have a more strong opinion one way or the other, but hasn’t expressed it.
Snuggles is the first cat (or any pet for that matter) in our family that has been cremated, and this is all new territory. I know in my heart I really want to have the necklace made- that it is beautiful, respectful memorial I can have with me always. By the same token, though, my Mom’s reservation and the fact I don’t really know how my Dad feels about it, have made me reconsider- should I do this? Does anyone have any opinions or advice as to the route I should take? I know that the choice is what’s right for me, but don’t want to make anyone in the family uncomfortable and regret it after the fact. I figured some people here may have experience with having a furry friend cremated and know a bit more about this, and someone may even own a piece of cremation jewelry. I think it may help to hear from people who are not quite as emotionally invested in the situation as our family is right now.