Cat Suddenly Refuses to Eat Unless Being Watched or Pet. Looking For Anyone Who Has Dealt With a Sim

[meownpurrher]

We have 2 male cats (brothers, both neutered, just turned 1 yr old) and one of them (T) has recently started this "affection eating" or "attention eating" behaviour. 

T has always been clingy and has had to deal with some anxiety issues in the past, but his love of food has always conquered any fear or worry.. until now.

It just started a few days ago and I have no idea why.  

He knows where his food is and will sit next to it, meow (loud, long) at us until we walk over to him, pet him/talk to him and watch him eat.

Since this behaviour started we have moved the dishes slightly so that instead of staring at the wall with his back exposed to the room now he has his back 'guarded' by the wall and has full view of the entire room. We had hoped that might help resolve the issue but it hasn't made a difference.
We have attempted to 'ignore' this behaviour but he refuses to eat unless we go to him. Sometimes we will let him walk away in hopes that he gets hungry enough to eat later, but by the end of the night, if I haven't seen him eat I'm too concerned to go to sleep until I know he's eaten so I will sit with him while he eats one big meal.  

We haven't changed anything (litter, food etc) or moved anything in the house. There hasn't been any change to our normal schedule or routine.

It's cute that he wants company during his meals, but I worry about the cause of this behaviour. I'm concerned he's not eating at all if we aren't home or awake.

I don't want to stray too far from the reason for this post but in case it makes a difference, some other anxiety issues T has been dealing with:

- Separation Anxiety: when he was younger it was so bad that even if 1 of us was gone for a night he would break out into Feline Acne (stress induced, obviously). He has overcome this and can handle being left alone now without loosing his mind. 

I work from the home, and my boyfriend is never gone for more than a few hours at a time for work/school so he is almost always has a human home with him.

- Hallway meowing: He will just stand in the hallway or on a cat tower and 'howl' for us (attention).
We have taught him that if he wants attention he has to come to us for it, by essentially ignoring his meows, sometimes making noises (like a fake cough or humming) so he knew where we were  (rewarding him for 'finding us').
After he meows for a few mins he will come to us, and if you just sit or lay with him for 5-10 mins he will be fine (no roaming and howling) for a couple of hours.

T and his brother (S) were orphaned at a very young age, we found them after a bad storm with their dead mother. This has obviously impacted them, they weren't weaned off milk when she died so they have both retained the suckling behaviour (chew, suck/lick fingers... usually before a nap). 

T fell in love with us instantly, but needs constant attention: he usually hates being the only one in a room, will follow us around the entire house and loves to be held/carried and cradled like a baby. He sleeps with us every night (though he doesn't usually stay the entire night, he comes and goes).

S was nervous of us at first, but warmed up significantly in the first few months. He doesn't need attention as often as his brother, he prefers to only show affection 1-on-1 (when nobody else is watching) and is content spending the day alone playing with the bathroom sink. He is good to his anxious brother and usually checks on him when he gets upset. S hasn't displayed any of the anxiety or issues that his brother has.

Some articles/forums have suggested the usual cause is aggression between cats, this is not the case for us. They get along very well. Cuddle/sleep together, play fight and run around together. I know for certain it is not due to bullying or anything like that. 

Any ideas on what could have caused this sudden change in behaviour? OR What I can do to help him get over/through this?

Thanks in advance to anyone who takes time to help us out! 

 

[fhicat]

Cute cats!

You've done very well in helping them cope with the world, so thank you for rescuing them.

You didn't mention a vet. Have you brought him to see one? Just to rule out medical issues, although it sounds like clingy-ness. 

At 12 months (up to 18 months) though, cats tend to go through what I call a teenage phase. This vary wildly between cats, but usually there is a change in behavior. It could be a phase.

How is his meal schedule like? Can you find out if he eats at times when you aren't around, since you mentioned that concern? How is he with changes in routine (i.e does he always eat at the same times before this incident)?

Have you tried walking away in the middle of a meal? My cat was like this at first. He wants me to sit with him, otherwise he won't eat. It wasn't a big issue for us and it didn't take long for me to change that behavior, but hopefully it may give you some ideas.

I would sit with him while he ate, and talk to him. I would do this for a few days. And then I gradually sat farther away from his bowl (I just inch along the floor with my butt), still talking to him. After about a week, I stopped talking to him, but still sat farther away. I kept doing this, and always kept him in sight so he could see me. About a month later, he was okay with me just completely walking away, although I still sit with him occasionally.

However! If I put food in his bowl without actually "telling" him, I find that he wouldn't eat it. Maybe he has no idea there's food in his bowl, maybe because he thought "last time I checked, it wasn't there, and Dad hasn't put some out." A few times I put food out without "telling" him, I come back (or wake up) hours later and find it untouched.

So in your case, I'm hoping it's just another phase of his anxiety, and that he can learn from you that it's okay to eat without Mom around. You could also sit with him before he does his long meow thing, but that is assuming he eats at set times.

I'm out of ideas for now, but keep us posted!

 

[meownpurrher]

We brought them home with the intention of finding them somewhere else to stay, but by the time we got home we knew we would be keeping them forever.

Well we haven't visited the vet since this "affection eating" behaviour has started. Not yet! It hasn't even been a week, so we were trying to fix it before it became a problem but clearly I was unable to so far.

We have discussed the other anxiety issues with our current vet, all they do is suggest we purchase Feliway. We have been looking into flower/plant essences (as well as dried plants/flower) and into Feliway as well, but until this we were able to overcome the anxiety with him. Lavender and chamomile have been mildly useful as calming agents. I honestly do not feel I get any information (useful information) from our current vet. They are nice, and they seem to know the basics but they haven't been able to tell me anything new (I research online for days whenever a new issue pops up, and end up knowing more about it than the vet does). BUT I have found another clinic that actually ONLY deals with cats, and on top of that they also had an entire section on their website dedicated to behavioural problems in cats and different methods, remedies/medicines, training that can help out so we have an appointment set up for next week (they were quite busy).

He doesn't seem to be acting different in any other way, but I know cats will go to extreme lengths to hide their pain/weakness so I am not ruling out a medical issue yet. I just want to help out if I can! 

Yeah, I've heard about this teenage phase they go through... and to be honest, we haven't experienced anything before this point so it could very well be just that! 
 

Currently we have dry food (Now! brand) in the same spot at all times. They are free to nibble at it when they please. We also offer wet food every day, but at different times each day. When he eats wet food he doesn't need our attention, but his brother is right beside him eating his wet food.

To be honest I couldn't fill up the food without him knowing if I wanted to. Any time I grab the container that holds the food, he comes running and circles my feet while I fill up the bowls. He always knows when it's full, and always the first to let us know when it's at the half empty mark (which of course to cats feels like the basically completely empty mark lol!) 

We want to switch them to a real meat diet, but aren't ready to make the switch until we have done more research.

We've looked into holistic pet shops, raw pet food stores and local farms that we can check out (in order to figure out the perfect recipe and find a safe, reliable source to get our meat from). 

The vet simply tells us to purchase Hills brand (because that is the brand they sell at the clinic), to avoid real meat diets and that's about it.

We do have the Hills dental food, which we occasionally use as 'treats'. We received a free bag of it with one of our visits, still using that bag.

We have been considering setting up one of the laptops to record the food area at night when we are not around, to see if he is still eating if we aren't around. He doesn't seem to be losing weight, but it's still early so maybe it's just not showing yet.

If we try to walk away he will stop eating, meow some more and then follow us around. Sometimes we can walk a few feet away and he is okay as long as he can make eye contact AND we talk to him, but then the next time you try it he stops eating and wants to be pet instead. He flip flops throughout the day. 

Thank you so much for your reply, we ALL appreciate your advice/help! Maybe it will just take some time, like with your cat!

 

[maple syrup]

Just a thought.. if he is eating the wet food without issue, then maybe there is pain with the dry hard food.  Try feeding him twice (or 3 times because he is still a kitten) a day with the wet food only.  If he is eating that, then he is getting all the nutrition he needs.  He may be more inclined to specific meals instead of grazing.. which is better for cats anyway.

If you are considering a raw diet, the sooner you introduce it to them as food the better.  Once cats are set in their ways it tends to be harder to transition.  You wouldn't have to go all  or nothing at this point... just give him some here and there so that he recognizes it as food. - A piece from whatever you are going to cook for supper each day is an easy start... A small piece of liver or other organ meat even better.  Chicken hearts are a great treat.

When we took our little guy home as a kitten the breeder was only feeding dry food.  I purchased a weeks worth of grain free wet, and the breeder had sent us home with a small supply of dry. Kipper ate the wet from day one and turned up his nose at the usual dry.... we threw it out.  The next week we introduced raw, and have almost exclusively been doing that ever since, but. because he knows that canned food is actually food, he will eat it if presented with it.  He has no food issues, and will eat anything we present in the raw....however the more it looks like prey ( chicken feet, quail, or small whole fish) he definitely needs to 'kill it' before he eats it. LOL