cat goes across the road and keeps meowing? also problem with a timid cat

[dreamgirl5]

So, I have three adult cats, two males (Tom and Ted, 1 and 2 years old) and a female (Sivka, about 5-6 years old, mother of Tom and Ted) and she has two kittens. The cats live outside, only sleeping in house when it's cold or raining. Few days ago I noticed that Ted, the older male, keeps going on a field across the road and meows. We don't know what's wrong with him. Also, when he was 1 year old, he dissapeard and was gone for almost a year, but he came back few months ago.

And I also have a question about Sivka. She afraid of humans, she doesn't let us pet her or even touch her, noo matter that we cared for her for almost 6 years now.

Is there any way to make her like us? we tried many things but nothing worked.

 

[jennyr]

I may be wrong but from your post it appears that you do not relate or interact very much wioth your cats, if they live outside all the time, rarely coming into the house. You say you 'cared for Sivka for 6 years now' but can you tell us exactly what you mean by that? When she was young did you play with her, talk to her, just 'be' with her? She may see you as simply a source of food and not as a personality to be loved or 'spoken to'. In order to change things now you might ahve almost to go back to first principles and make her associate you with good things - put her feed dish on top of something that smells of you, sit with her in a quiet room amd talk or read to her. This may be me interpreting things badly, but maybe you could clarify how things are. AS for Ted, he obviously has something that interests him in the field. Can you not go and investigate? Maybe there is a nest of mice underground or something else to capture his imagination. Maybe he is meowing because actually he wants you to come and have a look, to share it with him - stranger things have happened. Again, you need to give him a reason to stay home - lots of stimulation, play and toys. It sounds as if you need to share your life more with the cats and let them into the house as part of the family before you will get a positive reaction from them. In my experience, you get out of a relationship what you put into it, and that goes for animals too.

 

[simka]

Are they spayed and neutered? This makes a big difference to their behavior.
 

 

[yayi]

It would be a good idea to have your cats spayed and neutered. They'll be less eager to wander away and your female Sivka can stop having kittens.

You should not feel bad about Sivka. My cat Joji was like her for years. I waited until she came to me, before I tried petting her. But even if she never changed, it would not have made any difference to me.

 

[dreamgirl5]

jennyranson: I do spend a lot of time with my cats. Ted and Tom are great cats, Ted is usually very lazy and ignores all toys I give him, but Tom is very playfull, I play with him almost every day. I love spending time with my cats, patting them and playing with them. They often eat inside of house, I try to take care for them as much as I can, and as my pocket money allows me, as parents don't want to take care of 'em. Luckily my cats never had any illines yet (to knock in the wood hehe), not even flees for a long time, so it's not so serious that I can't afford a vet. (i'm 13). It's hard to do anything with Sivka, I can't be in the same room she is in without her running away. When she was a kitten I didn't have chance to spend time with her as I was too young then to act properly with them. She was actually a bit spoiled as a kit, but there was this friend that always carried her around and chased her and she hated that, and from then she is afraid. I'll try to do everything you said, maybe I manage to get her trust. I couldn't let cats into house too much as my brother and father are allergic (not too serious but still are). I'll also go and see what is Ted doing in the field. My mom got assumption (did I write that word right?) that he might be going there because there's a female cat. Or maybe he lived there for that one year when he dissapeard? could those be the problems? As for mice, I don't really think that would be it, my cats are all hunters and they often hunt mice, thought they mostly don't eat them but bring them in yard and play with them, later leaving them because they have enough to eat here.

My cats aren't spayed and neutered. Parents think it's a waste of money. Also I don't have any trouble with kittens. We always care for them and give them the best yunior cat food for beggining, and it's always easy to find a nice home for them. Sivka never gave birth to more than three kittens too so there isn't really much trouble. I would really like to have Ted and Tom spayed as I don't want them to wander away, or to get into a serios fight with a stray. I asked my parents few times, but they didn't allow. I was very close once when i talked to mom, but that didn't let it happen.

You probably think im too young to properly care for cats, but I really do everything I can to have them have good lives, and as I said, all since I've been taking care of them none of my cats had any illines or flees.

I'm very sorry for my awful English, it's not my mother tongue.

 

[yayi]

Poor Sivka, that friend of yours really traumatized her. 

In the matter of spay/neuter, perhaps you can google to find a nearby clinic or shelter that do the surgery for free or charge less than normal. 

 

[dreamgirl5]

I'll try to find something like that, but considering how our country is, I won't be too hopefull

 

[jennyr]

Thank you for making things clearer - I am sorry if I was a bit harsh, but I didn't know everything about your life with your cats, whom I am sure you love very much. I think it will be difficult to change Sivka, but by being gentle with ehr and not forcing her, just spending time near her, you might succeed. I guess nothing will change the boys unless they are neutered, male cats do off in search of females and to fight other males, so if there is anything you can do to persuade your mother, then that would be a good idea. It is much cheaper to neuter males than to spay females, so maybe she will agree.