Cat behavior has changed, need some advice

[damaeon]

Yesterday our 4 year old neutered female saw a cat outside of our apartment. It was on our porch, and technically our cats "territory". She screamed like something I have never heard, waking me from sleep. I got out of bed and she was next to my feet, and still screaming so i thought she might be injured. As i reached down, she cut my hand and hid under the bed. 

I looked in the living room and saw where she had pee'd on the floor in front of the porch door, and looking out saw this other cat.

After this, she spent all day under the bed, or closet growling and hissing. She will not be comforted by my wife or myself. 

We got her as a kitten, so she is our spoiled little girl. We always play and entertain her. Her demeanor is wonderful. I have never had a cat so behaved and loving. 

Last night we laid down to sleep, and she jumped into our bed like usual. After a few minutes she walked over for "pettings". My wife and I went slow and let her lead the petting. She would headbutt my hand and i gave her a petting without issue. I got up to get a drink of water, and when i returned, she immediately forgot me from 1 minute earlier and began screaming and peeing again. The wife and I slowly left the room and came to the living room where we have been ever since. 

Earlier i walked by the bathroom where i could look into the bedroom and she was on the bed. She looked at me, ears back and began the low growl of warning.

My confusion is of course because i dont know what to do at this point. We have moved her food and litter box into the bathroom where she has access. I don't know if I should call someone, as she does not like strangers at all. Now i feel like i am a stranger as well, and I am trying to figure out how to make that connection that the wife and myself are her "mom and dad" and not some people living here to hurt her.

She has never been neglected or hurt, and this behavior is so out of the normal that I have nothing to compare it to. I really need someone who has seen this before to pass along some good information.

I read on some other sites something called Redirected aggression and really not sure why she would change after 4 years.

Thanks for reading,

D

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• damaeon
• Feb 9, 2017

 

[madzoya]

Zoya had an episode like this when she was about 10yo.

There was a stray in our back yard and she was so freaked out that she wouldn't even be soothed by any of her people. I think he/she tried to attack her through the glass door. She had never dealt with that kind of agression before.

She also developed a huge fear of reflexive surfaces. I think she thought it was the other cat coming to get her.

It took some time for her to calm down and be herself again with us, probably more than a week. She would shake and shiver if we got too near. It helped that my father chased away the stray and she never saw him/her again. And we just kept reassuring her calmly that we were there and let her go through her motions

It took her months to be able to see herself in the mirror without freaking out. We had to cover all refletive surfaces in the house!

Try to talk to her softly but do not force contact. She will come to you when she's ready. Maybe try to put her somewhere where she can be calm for now.

 

[damaeon]

Perhaps when she couldn't get to the other cat, and I was close by she shifted her focus of the cat onto myself. So now when she sees me, she remembers how mad she was at the other cat. I only hope it doesn't become something permanent. I would hate for my cat to think of me as her reason for being mad. 

She came out a little while ago and sat on the sofa. I did not look her way, or try to force anything. She went back to the bedroom about 10 minutes later and started growling again. I feel like i did something wrong, but know I did not. We sure worry alot about our littles.

Thank you for sharing, it gave me a new insight.

D

 

[madzoya]

Try not to tense up when she's near. And don't feel guilty. She will feel it, they know stuff.

Breath and give her sometime. I'm sure she will be back to her old self. Some say that cat's memory lasts about a week, this will not be forever.

Remember, she is scared (probably more scared than mad). You need to be her rock, even from a far. If she senses you're insecure, it won't help. Keep to your/her routine, without being too intrusive.

And off course we worry, they are our furry kids! 

Please send us updates when possible.

 

[di and bob]

It is called redirected aggression. She has it now because of something about that other cat. She is so very scared and upset about the other cat she is directing her fear and aggression to something she can get at since she can't get at the other cat. Unfortunately, that is you. She will calm down in time, The problem is it is almost like starting over with a feral cat, it takes lots of patience and most of all time. You can't force it, some cats recover in a few hours, some take several days. You will get your old girl back, just give her space, offer yummy treats, and talk to her in a soothing voice. If at all possible talk soothingly before you enter any room she is in so as not to startle her, she is extremely fearful right now. It may take some 'calming treats' you can find on Amazon or feliway plug ins, they both help to calm. try to make sure she can't see the other cat, close any blinds and shut doors to other rooms. Never stare into her eyes, that is a sign of aggression too, to a cat. Go about your normal routine and give her space, she'll come around. My cats did this for several months when we first moved, there were so many ferals around here. It took a year of repeated exposure, now they can see them and not react at all. All the luck , and keep us posted!

 

[damaeon]

Another day,

She is touch and go. We slept on the sofa last night to give her space. She came out and also slept on the sofa, which is ridiculous because now my entire family is sleeping on the sofa and the bed is empty.

She is eating and using her box, and even acting like her old self. Then she has a moment where she kind of tenses up and then starts growling and being anti social again. Its almost funny, because she will give her tummy, then run over for a treat or ask to be petted with her nudging followed by a growl and go away time. She can't decide if she wants to be happy or mad. 

Thanks for the help yesterday, we are just giving her space and letting her lead the contact. 

D

 

[madzoya]

I'm glad you're seeing some progress!  She will be back to her own self soon!

 

[damaeon]

Update:

Almost comical at this point. 

She comes to us, eats, sleeps and does everything like she used to before the triggering event. Then for no reason, something goes wanky in her mind, and she hisses and looks at us like the devil. Then its off to the bed, and growl under there for a few minutes. Then she comes out and walks around like she owns the place (typical).

We got catnip toys and this calming pheromone spray from Petco. I don't know if it works, but she does take an interest when we spray it.

Our next plan is a VET visit. We know she is fine physically, and its the mental part that makes us unsure.

She pees when she does this, so we end up having to wait until she moves so we can take care of the issue. She has never had any rough encounter, or fight or anything "bad" from us. Sometimes I feel like we spoiled her too much and never set limits for her.

D