First, sorry you have to go through this. No matter the circumstances, it is always painful to end a relationship. Now, my story. I came home from a long day at work to find the house mostly empty, as well as the bank account. He had recently talked me into consolidating my credit union account into the joint checking account so, sadly, that was also gone. He kept me in court for 1.5 years trying to get spousal support, my retirement, and my house (that I owned for several years before I met him). In the end, he got none of those things but I got none of my money or things returned either. Ironically, I wasn't looking for a husband when I met him but fell for him because I thought he was such an honest and upstanding man. Was I wrong!!! Or duped... I never thought I was at risk for a "gold digger" since I work for wages, but apparently I was wrong. Fortunately, I can laugh at the mess now. Best of luck in your journey though the divorce process.
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Care to share your divorce stories?
- Thread starter kittylover4ever
- Start Date
Hi there.... Just one thing to keep in mind.... You will get out of this better off than what you were when you were with him. You will be happier and stronger. You can not, and should not be with someone who doesn't want to be with you - either if that is him, or you.
So... hang tight, be strong... This will pass, and you will be happy again.... And when you get there, you will see that you will actually be happier than before; happier than when you met him, and than when you were with him. This is nothing but a rite of passage. You will be fine, I promise
So... hang tight, be strong... This will pass, and you will be happy again.... And when you get there, you will see that you will actually be happier than before; happier than when you met him, and than when you were with him. This is nothing but a rite of passage. You will be fine, I promise
I don't have any advice, but I just wanted to say that I'm sorry & sending vibes & hugs!
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #24
Thanks so much everyone.......it's the hardest thing I've ever been through.....
Susie, you've been on my mind constantly since I saw this thread the other day.
Susie, I can share mine, but it will have to be via pm since my daughter is on this site as well, if you want me too.
Short version is: my first "true love",the man I was going to marry (we were common-law) the father of my firstborn, gave me an ultimatium and left me. He was my world, my everything... I loved him with all I had, which was part of my downfall because I did not know a world without him. It was scary, and at the time, the most difficult thing I ever have done. I was without family nearby, without friends (all my friends were his friends, I didn't really have my own friend) and dealing with him leaving me and entering into the world of single parenthood.
I'll happily tell you the full version, if you wish.
My thoughts and are with you during this time..... no words can heal the emotional devestation that you are going thru, but with time, It will get easier.
You are one heck of a woman, a strong and brave woman. You will rise above and get through this.
Short version is: my first "true love",the man I was going to marry (we were common-law) the father of my firstborn, gave me an ultimatium and left me. He was my world, my everything... I loved him with all I had, which was part of my downfall because I did not know a world without him. It was scary, and at the time, the most difficult thing I ever have done. I was without family nearby, without friends (all my friends were his friends, I didn't really have my own friend) and dealing with him leaving me and entering into the world of single parenthood.
I'll happily tell you the full version, if you wish.
My thoughts and are with you during this time..... no words can heal the emotional devestation that you are going thru, but with time, It will get easier.
You are one heck of a woman, a strong and brave woman. You will rise above and get through this.
It seems that everyone had an awful divorce story.
Divorce is a long term battle with your emotions; it's worse than losing your finances and your job.
My ex and I filed for collaborative divorce two years ago. The reason: irreconcilable differences. Our first year together was okay, but when he got a job from a well-known pharmaceutical company, his priorities and attitude toward our children changed. I know how tough the priorities he shouldered in the company, but it's not an excuse to get mad at me and the children everyday for no reason and spend most of his time at the office. I love my husband but I can no longer withstand his aloofness and his harsh attitude.
I know that everyone feels the sorrow of losing a spouse. Sometimes, you realise that there's something missing in your life after the divorce, but sooner or later you'll get use to it. Dealing with divorce is a hard process, but you have to remain strong for your children
Divorce is a long term battle with your emotions; it's worse than losing your finances and your job.
My ex and I filed for collaborative divorce two years ago. The reason: irreconcilable differences. Our first year together was okay, but when he got a job from a well-known pharmaceutical company, his priorities and attitude toward our children changed. I know how tough the priorities he shouldered in the company, but it's not an excuse to get mad at me and the children everyday for no reason and spend most of his time at the office. I love my husband but I can no longer withstand his aloofness and his harsh attitude.
I know that everyone feels the sorrow of losing a spouse. Sometimes, you realise that there's something missing in your life after the divorce, but sooner or later you'll get use to it. Dealing with divorce is a hard process, but you have to remain strong for your children
I'm going through a very difficult divorce myself, although I'm so new here that I don't really feel very comfortable sharing my story with the forum. Feel free to PM me if you want to know more and find out how I'm coping with it. Funny thing is that my divorce is indirectly why I'm here. I have wanted a cat for a long time, but couldn't get one because my soon-to-be-ex-wife hates cats. After she left, I decided a cat would be a great companion, and of course my wife couldn't protest!
I posted some pics of my new kitty in the pics subforum.
I posted some pics of my new kitty in the pics subforum.
Same here.
I married my high school sweetheart when I was 22 years old. I loved him more than anybody should love anyone, he was my reason to live. Not long after our 7th anniversary, I came home from work early, and caught him 'in flagrante delicto' with the woman I thought was my best friend. Needless to say, it was doubly hard on me. Not only had I lost my husband, but I also lost the one person who I would have leaned on. I'm not really sure how I made it through the first year or two. He vacillated between her and I, and I was too weak (and still in love) to refuse him. After two years of separation, I finally found a job in my home town and moved. I finally found the strength to tell him that we needed to divorce. Since he was an Engineer for GM, and the one to go outside of the marriage, I told him that he needed to pay for the divorce. We did our own paperwork, and for $50 filing fee, it was a done deal.
I can honestly say that my divorce has changed the way that I view relationships. I think that what I went through has damaged my self confidence and self esteem. I am too wary of being hurt to open up and try to trust. It's been over 20 years since my divorce, and I really doubt that I will ever want to be in another relationship again. I'm happy, and yes, quite content with my life now.
Susie, my heart goes out to you. You are strong, and you will survive. You will be happy again. ~~~Hugs~~~
I can honestly say that my divorce has changed the way that I view relationships. I think that what I went through has damaged my self confidence and self esteem. I am too wary of being hurt to open up and try to trust. It's been over 20 years since my divorce, and I really doubt that I will ever want to be in another relationship again. I'm happy, and yes, quite content with my life now.
Susie, my heart goes out to you. You are strong, and you will survive. You will be happy again. ~~~Hugs~~~
