Boy or Girl?

[hannerbananer11]

I have a one year and three month old fur ball named Hanner. I love her and spoil her absolutely rotten. I recently moved to a new apartment and it became just me and Hanner. At first she loved the new place. It wasn't as big but now she doesn't have any restricted areas because the whole place is ours (and by that I mean hers.) She still loves the new place, but now I have started working and going to school so I'm gone a lot. She has slowly begun to show signs that she is lonely and it is breaking my heart. After talking with some friends and family, we decided that I should adopt another cat. I know I want a kitten because Hanner is a very dominate cat and I feel like an older cat would be seen as a threat to her authority. But now I'm stuck with another tough decision. Would a boy or a girl work best with Hanner's personality? (She is already fixed so that's not a problem.)

Hanner is the queen bee and she needs to stay that way. She doesn't like to cuddle or be loved on too much but she won't go far out of my sight. If I'm on the couch, she has to be sitting on the back of it. If I'm at the dinner table, she is sitting in the chair beside me. So, seeing as how much she likes being with someone, I figured a kitten would be perfect. I know from experience that female cats are more territorial by nature so I worry that another female cat would be a problem. But I also worry about spraying and such from a boy cat. Of course I'll be spaying/neutering which ever gender I choose but I still wonder which would be a better choice to live and coexist best with Hanner. 

While I want the new cat, Hanner is my main priority. She has been my little girl for over a year now and I want her to be happy. I've been thinking long and hard about the decision to adopt another little one, and I've gotten most of the kinks out, I just need some advice of the gender. So if anyone has any advice, experience, or just general ideas please throw them out there!

 

[denice]

Gender doesn't matter with cats like it does with dogs.  With dogs opposite gender tends to work better but that has to do with the pack dynamic, opposite gender wolves don't vye for dominance.  Cats don't have the pack instinct.  The main thing with cats is the way you do introductions.  There are several threads here on how to do introductions.  The main thing is to take it slow and do a lot of scent swapping.  Jackson Galaxy does something called site swapping, where you switch the places where the cats are.  That would also serve to do scent swapping.  It may be a long time before the cats meet face to face and some cats don't take as long.

 

[catpack]

I would normally say that gender doesn't matter too much... It's more temperament. However, in my experience, a very dominate female *tends* to do better with male who is laid-back and social. Yes, a female with the right personality may work too; but I think I would tend to go with a male.

I too have a very dominate female (in a house with 3 other females and 10+ males.) Not a normal situation (I have several fosters), but Jasmine does much better around the males (so long as they do not try to dominate her.) The other females are fairly laid-back; but I find that Jasmine is more likely to attack them and have scuffles with them than she does the males.

Also, we use foster homes/communial living with the rescue and typically when we have a dominate female, they are just put with males. It just seems to keep everyone happier. BUT, there is always the exception to the rule. =)

 

[paws4life]

We he have a fwmale like yours and she does best with the 2 other laid back ones... In the end if you feel the kitten is the right one then go for it... Just introduce nice

 

[bunny52165]

Wow.... I am in the EXACT same situation.... only I have already adopted a little Kitten, Casey (who is an 11 week old male Tabby) and although it's only been 5 days, my resident Cat, Bunny, who is 2 years old is PISSED off at me big time! They have ot met face to face but she smells him and is very unhappy. I hope to God she accepts the little guy!

 

[bunny52165]

PS: Bunny's Vet told me to get the opposite sex and make him younger and smaller than Bunny. She is a Russian Blue and is overweight from living at the Humane Society over half her life.....she's only 2 yrs old and has a small build but she weighs 12 pounds! Little Casey only weighs 13 ounces and was the runt of his litter.

 

[catpack]

13 ounces??? How old is this kitten?

 

[bunny52165]

He's 10 and 1/2 weeks old. He was the size of a very small mouse when he was born. He's very tiny and fragile, but he's a little love-bug.

 

[hannerbananer11]

I was 100% planning on getting a little boy after ready all of these. But right when I walked into the shelter my eyes locked with a little girl kitten and it was love at first sight. She was so laid back, quiet, and loving. Tonight I'm going to have to sleep on it because I am going at 11:30 am tomorrow to make a decision. I need to do what's best for Hanner but the connection I felt for this little one (who will be named Kennedy if I choose her) was as strong as the one I felt for Hanner when I first rescued her. But I do have another question, is it better to adopt a 6 month old kitten or a 2 month old to coexist with a 1 year and 3 month old cat?

 

[catpack]

I say go for a 6 mo old. This way the new kitten can defend itself if needed. (Hopefully by following the intro steps, this will not be the case!)

Plus, I think they will be able to enjoy each other sooner.

Just my opinion, of course!

 

[hannerbananer11]

That is what I was thinking. Just trying to do what is best for both of us or well all three of us. I'm thinking I'll go in tomorrow, look one more time at all of my options, and let my heart decide. Sounds corny but that is how I feel a true connection happens with animals. 

 

[denice]

I believe that cats choose us not the other way around.  I think a laid back easy going kitty, as long as you do the intros right and take it slow, will be fine.

 

[paws4life]

It all depends..both my girls were kittens when they met the adult brothers and things went fine and the kitten grew up cuddling into the big guys... Check out my page here and go to the album with all of them in it.. If that's what you want get a baby kitten.. Even my crazy wild one now at 5 months crawls on top of the other ones and goes to sleep and they all snuggle together... And that's how I found nala and Amaya I was looking at their sisters and locked eyes with them (8months apart) and knew it was fate and brought them home and they just fit in perfect

 

[hannerbananer11]

Well today I brought home a little 2 month old girl that I named Kennedy. She doesn't even weigh a full pound yet but she is wonderful. She is very quiet, laid back, and loving. Hanner hasn't seemed aggressive towards Kennedy's sent so I am hoping all will go well when I introduce them officially