- Joined
- Jan 25, 2022
- Messages
- 18
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Hi everyone, I am in a terrible place right now after the sudden death of my best friend, my cat Jinx. I visited this forum a couple times in regards to his health and wellbeing and everyone was so kind.
Last Friday night I was just sitting in the living room drawing when my boy got up, ran into the hall, collapsed, howled, and started gasping for air. I went over to him and it was clear he was slipping away fast. I picked him up in my arms and he died. I rocked him and sang to him to help his spirit feel peace as he crossed over. It was my instinct to do this. I felt him reach the place beyond.
However, that secret reserve of strength I had in the moment has now dissolved and I am devastated and sitting in agonizing emptiness. He was only six and he was my everything, he came into my life when I was coming out of a very dark place and was a crucial part of my healing journey. Now I feel he was stolen right in front of me and I'm so mad, I'm mad with grief. I can't make sense of the pain. It is so unfair. I keep wanting to look for him all around the apartment. I can feel myself not letting myself accept that he's gone, thinking I can bring him back somehow.
He always had health issues since he was a kitten, he went to the emergency vets several times for intense nervous system, urinary, and respiratory symptoms no one could get to the bottom of. I wanted him to have a long full life . . . why did he have to leave me so suddenly? My best friend.
If anyone has any words of consolation I would be very grateful. Grateful also if anyone who's experienced something similar could share their story. I know life goes on after such a horrible sudden loss, but right now the grief, shock, and absence are excruciating.
Last Friday night I was just sitting in the living room drawing when my boy got up, ran into the hall, collapsed, howled, and started gasping for air. I went over to him and it was clear he was slipping away fast. I picked him up in my arms and he died. I rocked him and sang to him to help his spirit feel peace as he crossed over. It was my instinct to do this. I felt him reach the place beyond.
However, that secret reserve of strength I had in the moment has now dissolved and I am devastated and sitting in agonizing emptiness. He was only six and he was my everything, he came into my life when I was coming out of a very dark place and was a crucial part of my healing journey. Now I feel he was stolen right in front of me and I'm so mad, I'm mad with grief. I can't make sense of the pain. It is so unfair. I keep wanting to look for him all around the apartment. I can feel myself not letting myself accept that he's gone, thinking I can bring him back somehow.
He always had health issues since he was a kitten, he went to the emergency vets several times for intense nervous system, urinary, and respiratory symptoms no one could get to the bottom of. I wanted him to have a long full life . . . why did he have to leave me so suddenly? My best friend.
If anyone has any words of consolation I would be very grateful. Grateful also if anyone who's experienced something similar could share their story. I know life goes on after such a horrible sudden loss, but right now the grief, shock, and absence are excruciating.