I have another question...hope you all don't mind...but I get such good advice here, and it really helps me alot to get your input.
There are several times when Amber has been fed, changed, and cuddled for quite awhile, that she starts to fall asleep so I put her down in her crib, and then 15 minutes later she is crying, wanting to be picked back up and held somemore. I don't usually mind this, because I love holding her, but sometimes I need a little break, or need to get some things done, or need to get some sleep myself.
I have had many friends and family members tell me that by rushing back in and picking her back up, I am teaching her that everytime she cries, someone will be right there, and that this will make her cry all the more. They said that if I know she has been fed, and her diaper is clean, I should just let her cry sometimes.
I also read the same thing in a couple of my baby books, and they said it doesn't make you a bad mother to let them cry for awhile sometimes.
Problem is I DO feel bad when she cries, and I can't stand hearing her cry and not going in to her. Not because the crying is bothering me, but because I know she is unhappy and it makes me feel bad!!
There are conflicting views on this as well....the book Anne sent me (Dr. Sears) says this is wrong to let the baby cry like that, even if all her needs have been met, and she should be picked up when she cries. But the other books say it is a good thing to not rush in and pick them up everytime they cry, and that sometimes you just have to let them cry for awhile.
So what are your views on this??? I feel so terrible when she cries...but yet I have had friends say that they knew people who picked the baby up every time it cried, and that now their child cries constantly, and wants to be held constantly, ect...
Am I being a "bad" mother if I just let her cry for awhile sometimes, as long as I know she has been fed and changed? I have a hard time with just letting her cry. I feel so bad doing this...but yet, I don't want to pick her up everytime if it is going to cause problems down the road. And sometimes I just really need to get some sleep or fix supper, etc, and there is noone else around to hold her.
What are your opinions on this? How did you all handle this situation?
There are several times when Amber has been fed, changed, and cuddled for quite awhile, that she starts to fall asleep so I put her down in her crib, and then 15 minutes later she is crying, wanting to be picked back up and held somemore. I don't usually mind this, because I love holding her, but sometimes I need a little break, or need to get some things done, or need to get some sleep myself.
I have had many friends and family members tell me that by rushing back in and picking her back up, I am teaching her that everytime she cries, someone will be right there, and that this will make her cry all the more. They said that if I know she has been fed, and her diaper is clean, I should just let her cry sometimes.
I also read the same thing in a couple of my baby books, and they said it doesn't make you a bad mother to let them cry for awhile sometimes.
Problem is I DO feel bad when she cries, and I can't stand hearing her cry and not going in to her. Not because the crying is bothering me, but because I know she is unhappy and it makes me feel bad!!
There are conflicting views on this as well....the book Anne sent me (Dr. Sears) says this is wrong to let the baby cry like that, even if all her needs have been met, and she should be picked up when she cries. But the other books say it is a good thing to not rush in and pick them up everytime they cry, and that sometimes you just have to let them cry for awhile.
So what are your views on this??? I feel so terrible when she cries...but yet I have had friends say that they knew people who picked the baby up every time it cried, and that now their child cries constantly, and wants to be held constantly, ect...
Am I being a "bad" mother if I just let her cry for awhile sometimes, as long as I know she has been fed and changed? I have a hard time with just letting her cry. I feel so bad doing this...but yet, I don't want to pick her up everytime if it is going to cause problems down the road. And sometimes I just really need to get some sleep or fix supper, etc, and there is noone else around to hold her.
What are your opinions on this? How did you all handle this situation?