Annoying woman who likes my husband

[swampwitch]

Thanks for the great responses! Maybe "idiot savant" was a little harsh, but it felt good.

My husband and I talked about the situation once we realized what was going on. Since they are in the same field of research, they are going to be working together for a loooong time, even when she graduates and moves away for her post docs and permanent job. They will be collaborating on papers, going to the same meetings, etc. forever.

When she told him she wanted her parents to meet him, it was originally for lunch while her parents were in town, then it changed to meeting for coffee instead... O.K., that's part of his job. But then the coffee turning into evening coffee, which takes him away from his family. He did go, we both didn't think anything of it at first, but it was after that invitation that my husband realized he has to be very firm on showing her he is involved only in her professional life. These are his first graduate students (the other is a female, too), so it's a learning process.

I figured out that If I'm nice to her, I obviously don't perceive her as a threat. If I show hostility towards her, she thinks our relationship is not strong, and that she can move in. And if I get mad at my husband (for being in a situation he can't avoid), she'll be all too willing to listen to his problems!

I am also very nice to my husband, so he looks forward to getting away from work and coming home to me.

Because she says things like she did last night, he perceives her as a problem.

Cheers, from
SwampWitch

 

[charcoal]

You are handling it so well. I don't know that I would handle it as well.

 

[krazycatlover]

That is horrible.
I had a similar experience where one of my friends would always come over to my apartment when I was gone asking for me even though she knew I was at work. Anyway she owned me money cause I had a cell phone for her on my plan so I figured she just came over to pay me and didn't' really have time to do it any other time anyway all of a sudden when I told her she had to get her own phone cause I was canceling my plan she wouldn't talk to me anyway. I thought that she was just embarrassed because she owed me money and didn't have it. Anyway come to find out when she would come over she would ask to come in and wait for me and follow my boyfriend around the house and sit really close to him. She would also wear skirts and sit in inappropriate positions. Anyway my boyfriend just told me this recreantly. I don't really care cause I trust him but it makes me think that she stopped talking to me cause she was trying to seduce my boyfriend and he didn't budge for him or she didn't really have an excuse to come over so she gave up. And she was supposed to be my friend..

 

[maddensmom]

Originally Posted by Charcoal

You are handling it so well. I don't know that I would handle it as well.

I agree! Like Susie, I don't get jealous over anything...except my husband! I fully trust him and I know that he is mine and only mine, but stupid women can make me so mad sometimes!! We had one girl call his cell phone at least once a week for almost six months. No matter how many times he said "I'm in a relationship and I'm not interested" (and from the looks of her, he really didn't have any reason to be

) she just didn't get it.

I finally had to call and tell her exactly what I was going to do to her if she called him again. Haven't heard from her since and that was about 3 years ago!

 

[kittylover4ever]

Originally Posted by goosehazel

Don't worry, I don't do that to people I like, which is a short list, and you're on it

I be on it too right Laura?

 

[jenny82]

Originally Posted by SwampWitch

I figured out that If I'm nice to her, I obviously don't perceive her as a threat. If I show hostility towards her, she thinks our relationship is not strong, and that she can move in. And if I get mad at my husband (for being in a situation he can't avoid), she'll be all too willing to listen to his problems!

I am also very nice to my husband, so he looks forward to getting away from work and coming home to me.

Because she says things like she did last night, he perceives her as a problem.

That is so true!!

 

[neetanddave]

Originally Posted by goosehazel

Don't worry, I don't do that to people I like, which is a short list, and you're on it

PHEW! Thank goodness. I was worried that picking on Susie had tarnished my fine reputation, not to mention what hanging out with Karen might do to it.

 

[ericanicole]

No more rides.
that should cut it down right there.

 

[ilovesiamese]

I don't really care if other woman are interested in my husband. I trust my husband until HE gives me a reason to not trust him. IMO, it takes 2 to cheat and to me, it seems doubly as bad coming from someone who knows and is supposed to love you.

I think the reason I trust my Dh so much is because he tells me pretty much everything. There is this one girl at his work that has gone so far as to ask him straight out if he'd be willing to cheat on his wife. He just said no and walked away. I'm good with that.

 

[cheeseface]

Originally Posted by goosehazel

I'd beat the H E double hockey sticks out of her. Then when she was down, I'd kick her.

(didn't know about this side of me, did ya

)

-love the attitude Laura!