OK, perhaps I'm just too tired, but I thought I'd lay this out for you ladies, single or not, to bounce the idea around and tell me I'm not crazy for totally overanalyzing every aspect of this.
Me, 31, divorced two years from my HS 'sweetheart', lost my mom 4 mos ago, still not sure about the whole dating thing but sure I want a family someday (too busy w/school at the moment) and don't really like being alone. Not desperate, just lonely, and totally inept at dating - I can flirt like nobody's business, but I'm afraid it'll get me in trouble. Also know ZILCH about dating as I was practically engaged before I graduated high school, so haven't learned the basics of the game and feel less than a rookie most of the time.
Went out w/a girlfriend and her hubby this weekend to hear some music and (hopefully, in my case) do some dancing. Friday night, to a local bar - I live in a small town, so that could be good or bad. We met another couple they know and the five of us were having a great evening, talking, drinking, they were dancing and I was scanning the crowd hoping someone would be daring enough to ask (I know, overeager
) We were all served another round and the waitress said it was courtesy of the gentleman at the bar, who then came over and asked if I'd like to dance. Very NICE older man - like twice my age older - who was every inch the gentleman, bought our entire party another round or two, and asked if we'd like to go to breakfast after closing, his treat and his gas. We accepted, had a pleasant meal and he and I exchanged numbers, as he wanted to invite me out to go dancing or to dinner AS A FRIEND. He was very adamant about the fact that he only wanted my friendship, which made me a bit more comfortable as I'm scared STUPID of dating, in case you couldn't tell. Saturday afternoon he calls to say again that he had a good time, enjoyed our company, yadda yadda and I told him I'd definitely call him in the next couple weeks. My personal feelings: He's a very nice man, and he has the intellect and culture so many of the local residents my age are lacking. If he's truly interested in friendship, I'd like to foster that, as it's a lot easier (as a woman) to go new places and enjoy new things if you're not doing it alone all the time.
Saturday night, late, we go back to the bar, and I see that "Jim"'s car is in the parking lot - urk. I'm still ambivalent about him and had hoped I wouldn't be confronted so soon. So I let my friends lead and, purely by chance, they see two men friends of his right off, and I politely wave to Jim but make no move to approach. Polite introductions are made and we commence enjoying ourselves. Jim comes over to say hello, good to see you, I won't intrude but if you'd like to dance let me know. So after a few minutes I ask him to dance. Next dance (few songs later) I'm asked by new friend "Doug," and give a few spins around the floor. Short time later Jim says a hasty good night. Doug and I are getting to know one another, much flirting is done, and it's clear even to one with my ineptitudes that he's smitten and I"m mildly interested. But I move on a geological scale at this point in my life and tell him so, and please be patient w/me. I should mention at this point that I've had two drinks all night long and am completely clear-headed. My friends can see something's going on and are good about giving us space to chat, and when closing time rolls around I give him my number and he walks me out, and an awkward goodbye is made. I can tell he wants to kiss me, but I'm not completely comfortable with that so I keep my reserve.
So now, I've got a very nice man who may or may not be upset about me "changing partners" (:censor::censor::censor:? we just met) and a good ol' boy who is upfront about his physical attraction for me. And I'm petrified about what to do if and when the phone rings again!!! How do you ladies do it??????
Me, 31, divorced two years from my HS 'sweetheart', lost my mom 4 mos ago, still not sure about the whole dating thing but sure I want a family someday (too busy w/school at the moment) and don't really like being alone. Not desperate, just lonely, and totally inept at dating - I can flirt like nobody's business, but I'm afraid it'll get me in trouble. Also know ZILCH about dating as I was practically engaged before I graduated high school, so haven't learned the basics of the game and feel less than a rookie most of the time.
Went out w/a girlfriend and her hubby this weekend to hear some music and (hopefully, in my case) do some dancing. Friday night, to a local bar - I live in a small town, so that could be good or bad. We met another couple they know and the five of us were having a great evening, talking, drinking, they were dancing and I was scanning the crowd hoping someone would be daring enough to ask (I know, overeager
Saturday night, late, we go back to the bar, and I see that "Jim"'s car is in the parking lot - urk. I'm still ambivalent about him and had hoped I wouldn't be confronted so soon. So I let my friends lead and, purely by chance, they see two men friends of his right off, and I politely wave to Jim but make no move to approach. Polite introductions are made and we commence enjoying ourselves. Jim comes over to say hello, good to see you, I won't intrude but if you'd like to dance let me know. So after a few minutes I ask him to dance. Next dance (few songs later) I'm asked by new friend "Doug," and give a few spins around the floor. Short time later Jim says a hasty good night. Doug and I are getting to know one another, much flirting is done, and it's clear even to one with my ineptitudes that he's smitten and I"m mildly interested. But I move on a geological scale at this point in my life and tell him so, and please be patient w/me. I should mention at this point that I've had two drinks all night long and am completely clear-headed. My friends can see something's going on and are good about giving us space to chat, and when closing time rolls around I give him my number and he walks me out, and an awkward goodbye is made. I can tell he wants to kiss me, but I'm not completely comfortable with that so I keep my reserve.
So now, I've got a very nice man who may or may not be upset about me "changing partners" (:censor::censor::censor:? we just met) and a good ol' boy who is upfront about his physical attraction for me. And I'm petrified about what to do if and when the phone rings again!!! How do you ladies do it??????
