Aggression - no response from other cat?

[nickytoby]

Hi,

My husband and I have two cats - Nicky (c.2 y.o.) and Toby (c.1 y.o.) - who are mother and son (although they were separated so don't know it). They were introduced in a controlled, slow manner, as advised in cat books.

They are both neutered, have no medical conditions that can be found, have access to separate litter trays (2+1), food, and toys.

Nicky has generally been ok, although not particularly friendly, towards Toby since we brought him home some months ago, but in the last couple of months she has got more irritated with him. They have previously groomed each other (Toby to Nicky more than the other way round), and sat together, but she has never been really positive towards him.

Our question is what is going on now. She often hisses and swipes at him, but then he shows no reaction at all to this, and continues to approach her regardless. He is also happy to try to steal her food. We think we have seen her try to block his access to a scratching post before. Yet the both use the same litter trays and there have been zero incidents of weeing/spraying/pooing outside the litter box. They are happy to play with us as a pair.

We thought at first that this was clearly an instance of Nicky being aggressive - yet it seems to have absolutely no effect on Toby. We're not sure what to make of it - isn't he supposed to be cowed by this sort of behaviour? 

We do get the odd fight - but I think it is a play fight in Toby's eyes - although Nicky's ears are back and she growls.

Interestingly she often runs from other cats she meets in the garden, yet he almost never does - he doesn't have stand offs with them, he simply ignores them.

We did notice her sniffing his feet and then swiping him after he returned from the garden, so we don't know if this is part of it?

Anyhow, any thoughts are welcome.

Thanks.

 

[nickytoby]

We do get the odd fight - but I think it is a play fight in Toby's eyes - although Nicky's ears are back and she growls.

 

[tobilei]

I'm probably not a lot of help but I have been dealing with aggression from my older male towards younger kitties. Generally when they hit around 7 months of age. Circumstances between mine are similar to yours. He will charge at my younger one yowling but then stop and lick her head when he reaches her. I've managed to figure out some of it is redirected aggression, some is him asserting the fact he's alpha cat and some is territorial. The rest I have no idea.

Like yours, sometimes he will guard a litter box or room, but he's happy to play with her, happy to share food bowls and happy to share litter boxes and play with us at the same time as her. It's really strange.

So far I've been having some luck running feliway in the loungeroom, having lavender plants between the food bowls and giving him a cat treat supplement containing tryptophan as well as making sure I play with both at least twice a day.

It could be that she has redirected aggression if it's worse after he's been outside too.

 

[nickytoby]

Thanks for your reply - it certainly sounds like a similar kind of situation. I think you're probably right that it's a combination of Nicky asserting herself as alpha cat/ redirected aggression / territorial. Could have got worse in the past few months as Toby is bigger now and no longer a kitten, and he also now spends much more time outside (where the neighbourhood cats Nicky runs away from dwell).I suppose we're just lucky that Toby ignores any aggression!

Anyway, we will take your suggestions on board. Thank you!