Advice On Befriending a Stray Cat?

[911imcucu]

About a week ago, my mom told me about seeing a cat on our front deck after I was asleep (we have a motion sensitive light that turned on, so she went to see what was out there). She was telling me how it was looking through our recycling bin for food. The next day, we started leaving some water and cat food outside for it, since we have three cats already. I finally got to see the cat for the first time last night. When the light came on, it looked like it was starting to panic, and it was eating its food really quickly, as if it was in a hurry to leave. The first time I saw it, I said "hi" to it in a soft voice, and it left right away. It came back some time later, and this time I didn't say anything to it, and I just watched it eat. When it saw me, it  would look at me for a second, but then it went back to eating, and left right after finishing its food.

Basically, even though we wouldn't be able to adopt this cat, I would love to become friends with it. Is there any advice that I could use to help get it to trust me?

 

[catwoman707]

Hi there and welcome to the cat site!

Your post really warmed my heart and made me smile. I love that you would like to befriend this poor kitty.

I also am glad you are leaving food and fresh water. They have a hard life, and this is a huge help.

To start off, it's your presence. With what has gone on so far, we don't know if it is a semi-feral, meaning once owned and for whatever reason has no home now, and maybe hasn't for some time, which will cause a cat to be very shy, afraid and avoid humans due to total lack of interacting with people for so long.

Or a feral, has had minimal/no human interactions ever. 

Either way, you CAN befriend him, just that if he is feral, it is an even slower process. Months-years, but progressive.

Let me just sort of run this all down to you as if it were me.

Continue to leave food out daily, to create a pattern, cat knowing/expecting that food will be there.

I would start a friendship through the window, veeery slowly. Just saying hi, or him knowing you are there is perfect. Continue this after he has seen you several times and continues to eat, and very softly, gentle voice, non threatening.

After the first time you say hi and he doesn't take off, the next time you are going to use that same voice, and say more, talk to him, ask him if he likes the food, etc etc.

If he acts like he wants to take off, stop for a minute so he settles again, then continue. It could be that he took off when you said hi because it startled him, he didn't know you were there.

He will realize soon enough that you are no threat to him.

You are going to do this for some time, talking to him, he learns your voice and has at least enough trust to eat while you are talking away.

Once this is accomplished I would start to show myself slightly. I don't know the setup of your house and where the door is to the front deck, if you have a screen on it?

If the door opens up onto the deck, by now he will have a regular time he comes to eat, and you might even notice he comes more often too, which means he already has a sense of 'safe'.

Okay this is part 1. I am happy to walk you through this friendship, as I have made many feral friends doing tnr and then continuing to care for the cats through their lives and am glad to help!

 

[potatodood]

I agree with the above poster. The best and most universally accepted way to get them to like you is through their stomach, so keep feeding it! One suggestion though is to get it used to your scent. If you feed it dry food, run your hand through it and shake it up with your hand. Put a towel in your bed as you sleep and lay it out by its food bowl so it can familiarize you with your scent. Obviously never rush it and let the cat come to you and initiate everything. It took months if not a full year to pet my feral and stop hissing at me. He can't be picked up and I doubt he ever will, he's a tough little bugger and rough around the edges, but I do like that sucker.

 

[911imcucu]

Thanks so much! These suggestions have really helped!

 

[StefanZ]

 
Thanks so much! These suggestions have really helped!

Please report more, I see this thread began a couple of month ago.

I understand you are satysfied as these advices helped you, but please tell more, tell more!    

 

[911imcucu]

Okay! Well, the cat has definitely gotten used to me more, although I still can't come near it or anything. I still don't know if it's a boy or a girl. However, last night I started waiting until the light comes on and I bring the food out and set it down where it can see me. It stays at the bottom of the stairs (the top of the stairs are only about three feet away from the door, and there's only four or five stairs) and doesn't run away! It's also started meowing at me when I give it the food, which it seems to do when it's hungry and can't get to its food right away. Also, when I watch it eat from the window, it still looks up at me occasionally, but it's not very long, and not as often. I've also been able to talk to it without the cat getting scared.

 

[taurinecat]

Make sure you get kitty fixed as soon as you can. This will help immensely with your taming process, among the many other benefits. 

Sounds like your patience is paying off. Sometimes catnip can help in addition to food/treats. And make sure you get some nice smelly tuna when you get to the trapping phase.

 

[wallycats]

I used to sing to one of the ferals (I name them all) and would sing-song his name when I brought food.

Some ferals/strays can really be dumped or lost cats so once you gain their trust, they may be more receptive to you.

Love to hear you are feeding it.

 

[911imcucu]

Update: The cat lets us pet it now, and we found out it's a girl! Based on her actions, we think that she may not be feral, but had a home at one point and either ran away or was abandoned. She has a problem with ear mites right now, but we've been using olive oil on a cotton ball on her ear, and it seems to be helping. But when we hold her to clean out her ear, she doesn't even try to get away, as if she's used to it. She's so sweet, and she's

quite the talker!

Here's a picture of her

photo (2).JPG

• 911imcucu
• Sep 3, 2014

 

[playerdark]

Yes that's not a feral then. You should be able to get her used to you quickly then by constant interacting. Best thing for a cat is to be off the street if possible. With a feral that might be difficult but if she was with humans at some point she will remember and accept a house

 

[Norachan]

It's so nice to hear that you managed to get this stray to trust you. She's a beautiful girl.

Have you managed to get her to the vet yet? If she lets you clean her ear it shouldn't be any problem getting her into a carrier so the vet can check her over. You'll need to get her spayed if she hasn't already been done. Are you going to try and re-home her or maybe she's found a new home with you?

Thank you for helping her.

 

[taurinecat]

Yes, please make getting her to a vet a priority. They can check to see if she is spayed and can prescribe you some awesome stuff for ear mites. I like to use prescription Advantage Multi on my indoor/outdoor cats. She is lovely! Thank you for helping her.