Advice for a cute but sometimes aggressive kitten

[janitor]

This is my first post here, so I apologize if some of my questions are common knowledge. I am a new cat owner and we have a beautiful little kitten. We have had her for just about 3 weeks now and she is about 2 months old. 

Recently we notice that bites and swats at us a lot. There is no hissing or claws but it is a little unnerving as it may develop into something worse as she gets older and stronger. We never play with her using our hands just wands and fabric balls.  

Also this morning when we woke up and were about to start our morning "connection time" Which means my wife and I sit with her and  play with her, she jumped at my face. Again, no hissing or claws. This seemingly came out of no where too. She was playing under our coffee table and when I looked into to see what she was doing, she pounced. This resulted in me yelling at her and putting her in her "cat room" This is the area where she has her cat tree, food, and litter box but we can close the door. 

My main concern is that the other cats and kittens that I have looked after have always been loving and outgoing. Our kitten still doesn't return the "cat kisses" and at times will try and bite if you try to pet or pick her up at the wrong time. 

Other than those times she is a great kitten. She greets me at the door when I come home and loves cuddling up to my wife when she naps. I do get the feeling that she doesn't fully trust me but I am not sure. I just try to be as gentle as I can and spend a good deal of time with her. 

Does anyone have any advice for a new cat owner and how to build or improve a bond with this type of Kitten?

 

[catpack]

Having gotten her around 5 wks old, and she is an only cat, she likely just hasn't learned "proper" social skills. In an ideal situation, she would be with momma and siblings until the age of 8-10 wks. They learn SO much from their mom and each other during that time.
It really seems like she is playing with you (age appropriately) like she would a sibling. She's still figuring out what is appropriate play behavior.

I would continue encouraging her to play with toys. If she does jump at you, you could make a high pitched squeal to simulate a sibling fussing at her. Also, if able, getting her a playmate whom she can learn with would be the most ideal thing, IMO.

 

[pedro]

Its probably the cat being playful, when my cat was around 3-4 months old, anyone found sitting on the floor after dark was fair game for clawing and biting, then he would dash off to see if you would chase him. This behavior disappeared two or three months later. Sometimes is about how you move around the cat that sets them off, try to look for behavior clues, like: If he is laying on the floor wigglying his tail, he is defending that area, trying to pet him then will probably get you bitten. Approaching the cat from above can also seem threatening to them.

You'll have to give us what was happening before the "attacks" and what you did. Sometimes is just the cat being a cat, you have to read the behavior tips its giving before making your move, but most probably its just a kitten being a kitten and attacking stuff because its fun.

 

[MoochNNoodles]

Having gotten her around 5 wks old, and she is an only cat, she likely just hasn't learned "proper" social skills. In an ideal situation, she would be with momma and siblings until the age of 8-10 wks. They learn SO much from their mom and each other during that time.
It really seems like she is playing with you (age appropriately) like she would a sibling. She's still figuring out what is appropriate play behavior.

I would continue encouraging her to play with toys. If she does jump at you, you could make a high pitched squeal to simulate a sibling fussing at her. Also, if able, getting her a playmate whom she can learn with would be the most ideal thing, IMO.

  A hiss at her is what Mama would do to say "knock it off kid!"

 

[janitor]

Thanks everyone. This mornings face attack came pretty much out of nowhere. I was sitting on the floor waiting for her to come over and play he stopped under the coffee table. I crawled over as I feel that she is a bit scared of me when I am standing. I gently called help name in a soft voice. She lowered her self and pounced. 

After gave her a loud "NO!" Looked her straight in the eyes, pointed my finger at her and said "NO!" again. She then took some swipes at my finger and that was when I scooped her up and took her to her "time out" Room.

After ignoring her for about 15 minutes, I went in to check on her. She came over and head-butted my hand and then went on to play in the living room. 

 

[MoochNNoodles]

That sounds like a pretty typical way a kitten of her age would act with a sibling or perhaps her mama.  I think she just needs to be taught acceptable behavior.  

 

[janitor]

 
That sounds like a pretty typical way a kitten of her age would act with a sibling or perhaps her mama.  I think she just needs to be taught acceptable behavior.  

Thanks everyone. I think she is getting better. However, this morning during playtime she really got "over excited" and when I went to check on her she jumped at me again. This time I did no sudden moves or anything and she was "cat kissing" me when I approached. However when I leaned closer to her she jumped at me. Her pupils were huge! So I am guessing she was frightened or excited not sure. 

As for "teaching" her what is acceptable, in this case, what should we do? Ignore her? give her a time out? 

The thing is that we are really trying hard to asses her needs but she is still kind of distant at times. I mean she is affectionate and playful then acts almost scared of us. It is kind of strange. 

 

[janitor]

Hey everyone one, I am needing your help again. Things have gotten a bit worse. We were away for the better part of the day, yesterday. Now our kitten is being a bit of a brat. The hissing has no effect on her and shouting "NO!" either gets her angry and she tries to take a swipe at us or she runs away in fear. 

This morning she was running around and jumping on everything.  She put holes in our new couch and I even found her climbing the screen on the bedroom window.  We put her in her room for awhile and when we went back she was calm and allowed my wife to pick her up. However, when she was going to put her down again she lightly bit her.

The options that I am considering are buying a feliway plugin and seeing if that helps her aggression and stress. Also during her "wild time" getting her to use her cat tree. Does anyone have any suggestions? My wife and I are really stressed out and thinking that adopting our kitten was a mistake. I feel that it she will grow out of it but my wife thinks that the kitten with only get worse especially as we are starting to see a bit of a temper coming out of her. 

 

[pinkman]

If you are going to be away for most of the day and can afford/have space for another kitten I would get her a playmate. It's really better to have two kittens than one if there isn't an active cat already. If she had a playmate she would direct that energy to the other kitten, not the humans. As frustrating it is what you are describing is normal kitten behavior. 

Do you clip her claws? If not it's a good idea to start getting her used to it.

Also, how often and how long do you play with her? And how do you actually play with the kitten? She really needs to exhaust all that kitten energy. What kinds of toys do you have for her? She should really have a few toys - one interactive (think string on a stick, fishing pole, something you hold to play with), a few solo-toys (like balls, milk caps, mice), and a "comfort"/beat'em up toy such as a stuffed animal. Ideally, you'll want to play with her with an interactive toy a lot. Don't just rely on the balls and fake mice. Get her running and jumping! When she is being rough and about to bite at you redirect her with the stuffed animal.

I have a 16 week old kitten and a 3 year old cat. I also work from home. To be frank, if I had to commute to work or was still in classes I'd probably have not gotten a kitten due to the fact that they really need attention, lots and lots of play, and can be destructive if left alone.

 

[janitor]

She has all the toys and we play with for an hour or two in the morning before work and pretty much all night until she is worn out. The problem is that she bites when purring and then when she is playing. She also is swatting a lot now. I think that she knows she is bad as she swats, bites and then runs away scared. Tonight she did the same thing and ran away into our storage area. I had to fish her out and she was shaking. We don't hit her  or anything just shout "NO" but she seems to be the most afraid of me. Not sure what to do. 

 

[janitor]

I started another thread but I really don't know what to think of this kitten's behaviour. We follow all the rules and I still feel like there is very little bond between the kitten and I. Also she is exhibiting some interesting behaviour that I do not know what to think of.

1) She rolls, plays around and sits in her little box.

2) She is very possessive about her droppings as well.

3) She freaks out easily and routinely arches her back runs around.

4) She hides a lot especially after biting

5) If you come near her at times she freaks out and gets really stressed.

6) She is a picky eater who only eats if you feed it to her bit by bit. 

7) She seems to have a bit of a temper (tell her "no!" too many times and the tail swishes and whatnot)

Now we have never punished her hard just shouted after her and/or picked her up when she hides away in an area that could make her sick or is unsuitable. The thing is that she looks a me like I am going to eat her half the time. My wife gets most of the affection despite being the "NO!" sayer most of the time. 

We are taking her to the vet tomorrow to get some shots and to get her checked out. I just feel that perhaps trying to fish her out of places has imprinted a threatening response or something. I play with a lot but she rarely shows affection these days unless she is really sleepy and then she purrs away. 

I know that many have said to get her a play mate but that simply isn't feasible at this time. Are there any other pieces of advice on how to handle this little kitten? 

 

[nbrazil]

Just to preface things.... I'm not one of the "experts" here, only a guy that got a kitten 3 months ago and had similar issues. Meaning, I got my guy at 8 weeks of age and he hadn't learned all of his manners. I work, and he, as a single kitten, was home all day.... and so all that energy became compressed and expressed towards me. I did everything right... hands are not toys, hissing like a mother - oh gosh, EVERYTHING. And yet he would do things like yours (except he wasn't destructive.... yet). I had him fixed at 4 months. Anyway, he was in the puffed up like a halloween cat, pounce on my feet phase when I had to make a choice. There were basically two:

As I saw it, tough it out - he is a kitten, they require a lot of attention (in order to direct their energy). I had never heard of single cat syndrome, and its associated play aggression before. It doesn't always happen, kittens vary greatly in temperament - nor does it always result in a brat. They just go through phases. So, I could tough it out, continue "teaching" him manners and be very patient because inevitably he would grow up and out of it. Oh, in another 6 to 12 months!

Or... I could get another kitten that could handle him and teach him manners. Being a Ragdoll, he is huge for his age, and I couldn't afford another one... but many rescue organizations have behavioral counselors.

I chose the second option and provided a home for a rescue. I followed the introduction techniques given at this site and within two weeks, problem solved! Two kittens are easier than one, they run out each other's energy, leaving the loving goodness for me.

So that's how I see it, patience, patience, PATIENCE - and keep doing what you are doing even though it seems like there are no results. The kitten eventually grows up. Or get another kitten for a play pal.

YMMV

 

[Willowy]

Cats are very close to their wild ancestors. So it's natural for them to get scared easily (yeah, some don't but it is a natural thing). They don't respond well to any kind of punishment and don't understand what humans consider "bad" or "good"---they just know that sometimes you're scary. And many cats lash out when they're scared. It sounds like she's a cat who gets scared easily, and one who lashes out. So you need to do whatever you can to boost her confidence. No shouting, no grabbing her abruptly, don't even say "no". If she's doing something naughty, distract her by throwing a toy or something else that's not negative. If she hisses/swats/etc., become very still and do nothing until she chooses to walk away. . .no reaction at all. If she bites your hand, make it limp, do not move, and show no reaction. She needs to learn that she can trust you and you'll never be scary no matter what she does.

The big picture is that you want her to grow into a confident and friendly adult cat. Her kitten naughtiness is not the issue you should be worried about and should be largely ignored (of course she needs to be removed from danger but do it in a totally neutral way. If you can get her to leave the dangerous area without picking her up, that would be best. Throw a toy, wiggle a string, etc.). So before you do anything, stop to consider if it'll help her be more confident or not.

 

[katluver4life]

Kittens need a lot of attention and things to keep them busy. They are high energy. Sounds like she just needs some of that high energy burned up and redirected. Give her cardboard boxes, paper bags, use wand toys to make her leap and jump.  You can use a laser, followed by a toy she can then catch. Track ball toys can keep her busy for hours.

Give her places she can call her own like a cat tree or window perches. Since she is a single kitten, you need to enrich her environment to keep her busy and feeling like she owns your home.

 

[janitor]

Thanks for the reply. Essentially  she has all the toys mentioned and we do play with her a great deal. Especially the wand toys and little things that we flick across the room and she actually returns them. 

I do have a question about the cat tree. We bought a nice one for her but she doesn't see to be taking to it as much as we thought. It has multiple levels and numerous scratching posts yet she rarely plays on it. I wonder if it is the location as it is right by the window. It might be too noisy for her. 

 

[MoochNNoodles]

Does she respond to catnip yet?  Some kittens don't and some don't until they are older.  But if she does you can try rubbing some on the cat tree.  Or place special toys or a treat on it to get her to climb it.  Our tree is right in front of a window looking into our backyard and my girls love the bird watching.  But they are 8 so a different energy level.  I used to feed my girls on theirs if my DD was in the room when she was smaller.  I guess just make it positive for her.  You can try moving it around; but I do think her age just might be a part of everything.  

 

[janitor]

Cats are very close to their wild ancestors. So it's natural for them to get scared easily (yeah, some don't but it is a natural thing). They don't respond well to any kind of punishment and don't understand what humans consider "bad" or "good"---they just know that sometimes you're scary. And many cats lash out when they're scared. It sounds like she's a cat who gets scared easily, and one who lashes out. So you need to do whatever you can to boost her confidence. No shouting, no grabbing her abruptly, don't even say "no". If she's doing something naughty, distract her by throwing a toy or something else that's not negative. If she hisses/swats/etc., become very still and do nothing until she chooses to walk away. . .no reaction at all. If she bites your hand, make it limp, do not move, and show no reaction. She needs to learn that she can trust you and you'll never be scary no matter what she does.

The big picture is that you want her to grow into a confident and friendly adult cat. Her kitten naughtiness is not the issue you should be worried about and should be largely ignored (of course she needs to be removed from danger but do it in a totally neutral way. If you can get her to leave the dangerous area without picking her up, that would be best. Throw a toy, wiggle a string, etc.). So before you do anything, stop to consider if it'll help her be more confident or not.

wow this is very interesting. So basically what you are saying is that most of this naughtiness, which in the cat world isn't naughtiness at all, should be ignored. So the best bet is to just leave her be. That is a very subtle approach. 

I am curious as to how we can "boost her confidence" At the moment it seems that the best way to deal with a kitten is to approach her on her own terms and do not do anything to disturb her. This seems like it would get a little frustrating. So far he has not damaged anything but what would you do in a case like that?  

 

[katluver4life]

When my 2 were kittens, I used their toys to get them accustomed to climbing the tree. Waving her wand toy around it and teasing her up the tree. This will also help teach her to use the tree to scratch on.

 

[rosiemac]

 
Now we have never punished her hard just shouted after her

Please, don't shout at her, because that alone will stress her.

She's a baby, and just like children they get up to mischief.   Enjoy it because they won't be like that forever

 

[nbrazil]

wow this is very interesting. So basically what you are saying is that most of this naughtiness, which in the cat world isn't naughtiness at all, should be ignored. So the best bet is to just leave her be. That is a very subtle approach. 
 
I am curious as to how we can "boost her confidence" At the moment it seems that the best way to deal with a kitten is to approach her on her own terms and do not do anything to disturb her. This seems like it would get a little frustrating. So far he has not damaged anything but what would you do in a case like that?  

Same caveat as my previous post.

I'm not a cat behaviorist, but I watch one on TV, LOL. Regarding boosting confidence... I think it means providing an environment that allows a cat to 1) feel safe and 2) lower stress*. Now on the tv show this often involved two cats - so, to be safe, in one scenario, was to provide shelving for one cat to get up away from the other, i.e. an escape route. Now with a single kitten, I don't know how that might apply except, well, you've gotten a cat tree - great start. I know you say it isn't interested now, but if I've learned anything from my kittens, its that their interests can change day-by-day.

I don't think "leaving him be" means leaving him to be a terror, one still should be involved to direct the energy as much as possible. The hardest thing is your comment what would you do if he did damage something? Keeping in mind that even if you catch him in the act, punishment won't work (like on a dog) - it will just frighten him. Redirect his attention (typically with wand toys). If you find something damaged after the fact, well, you asked.... calmly clean up. There is really nothing you can do to have him associate his actions with the damage, and even if you did, he was just being a kitten. They are emotional sponges AND emotional mirrors at the same time. So the answer is, remain calm and realize he will outgrow this. I know, not a very helpful answer.

Bottom line is patience. (Just distilling all the advice I was given.)


*Regarding stress - when a cat is stressed they "misbehave." That is to say, in order to "comfort themselves through the stress" they revert to one of their automatic behaviors in excess. Which is to say, for instance, automatic behavior is pooping, so they "miss" the litter box.... or they hide, or they act aggressive. See what I mean? Technically "misbehaving" is really "over behaving" - i.e. compensation for comfort's sake. They are very simple beings.

This doesn't mean that every time something like this happens to suspect stress.... only if it is an ongoing pattern. Then put kitty googles on and look for what might be stressing him.

(Wow, I almost sound like I know what I'm talking about, LOL.)