7 month old male aggressively affectionate

lo-botomy · Nov 20, 2013

Hi all!

I have a question about peculiar behavior from my 7 month old male kitten. He is neutered, and was when I adopted him on October 1st. I adopted him from a shelter, and all I know about him is that he was taken from a hording house.

He is extremely, even obsessively affectionate. That normally wouldn't be a bad thing, but he seems constantly desperate for affection. He follows my every step right under my feet, climbs me when I'm standing still (and won't stop no matter how much I set him aside or push him down.) I have cuts all over my body from him climbing me, and have to cut his nails a few times a week to keep from getting torn up. Not like a normal kitten looking for attention, but literally every second I am home he is doing this.

He also gives "love bites" and is always trying so suckle on any part of skin he can. Sometimes so intensely that it hurts. I love him to death and I play with him often and love being affectionate, but it's so overwhelming and intense that I can't function without going into another room and closing the door. Any suggestions???

aprilprey · Nov 20, 2013

The only thing I can think of is: when you play with him, are you pushing his acrobatic abilities to the point you are wearing him out? I know I know....its tough to wear out a kitten. It could also be his personality type - some cats seem to thrive on MORE interaction than others. Alpha, beta, gamma...I can't remember which one is the most high maintenance.

Get a wand toy and when work him out so he's doing some really high jumps and leaps; with enough intensity of a workout, he might get pooped and sleep for 15 minutes afterwards. You might also do a play session right before a meal...the combo of play with food right after might get him to mellow out enough that you can catch your breath.

Wish I could help more...but I've only had a couple of cats that young. Maybe someone with some rescue experience can weigh in.

bluebird gal · Nov 21, 2013

I also think it's personality as our 15mo old male is that way - primarily with me. He has done this since he was 8mos old (when we rescued him). If I lean over into a cabinet, or brushing my teeth, etc. he's on my back, planking as I now refer to it. LOL Occasionally he does slide off leaving a lovely scratch here and there. But I have not tried to correct it really as I turned it into a game : "Where's Mommas big lovins?" And he will put his paws up on my shoulder and lets me scoop him up, instead of clawing his way up to wrap himself around my neck. At least I have a chance not to get clawed up. And he is huge on the love nips - mostly to my throat and chin when he determines it's time for me to get up in the morning. He will be all snuggles then NIP!

We do wear him down as best possible with wand toys and his laser mouse. Like Aprilprey mentioned hard play just before meal time and he's out like a light so you have a few hours to lick your wounds.

Good luck and I will be following this thread closely too. I really don't mind the nips or the planking .. but I would love to know how to stop the Bruce Lee level play attacks on the back of your thighs when I walk into the house and don't pet him first.

peaches08 · Nov 21, 2013

Is there a toy that he likes to chew on? I'd redirect his love-biting to that when it starts. Biters can be hard to retrain; been there done that.

Same cat, he could only handle so much stimulation before the biting would start. Never mind the fact that he's the one begging me for attention! Wand toys, throw toys, patience and drawing the line is all I can advise. Gadget now understands "No!" and will stop the offensive behavior, so I reward with safe play like wands, laser pointer, and etc. He's doing the bad play much less these days, and usually because I didn't redirect him immediately once I see the signs.

fluffybeard · Nov 21, 2013

My 6 month old is similar. When I walk around he'll run with his body pressed against my legs. And he's recently taken to being a pirate parrot! He'll jump on my back when I'm kneeling down and climb up on my shoulder. If I'm wearing a hoodie he'll put his feet in the hood and just hang out on my shoulder while I go about my business for 20/30 min at a time.

I don't mind that cause he manages not to scratch me, although once it gets warm again and I'm not walking around my home in sweaters, it might be a different story!

But his love bites do hurt! When he's playing or trying to wake me up, he has fantastic bite inhibition. He'll bite with hardly no pressure at all and it never hurts. But when he is in the throws of affection he'll chomp down on my face! It used to be really bad, but I found out that for him, it works better to act annoyed rather than hurt. So if I'm laying in bed and he comes to snuggle and suddenly chomps my face, I do a slow, loud groan and whine like, "owwwwww...ohhhhh...noooooo.....stoooooop" and I turn over so my back is to him. That has calmed his love bites quite a lot! The acting hurt/leaving the room/clapping hands advice never worked for him. He probably doesn't like the sound of my whining, lol.

lo-botomy · Nov 21, 2013

Thanks for all the replies! I went to bed before I saw any of them.

I do try to wear them both down (I also have a 3 month old female) with a wand toy and laser pointer. I also 'wrestle' with them and even play chase sometimes. I've started having to sleep with my door shut, because he will jump up on my bed and climb all over me and bite my face. He also likes to put his paws in my mouth... lol. I always have to be prepared for that one. I do love him to bits, I just don't know if the behavior is something I should be concerned about, or if maybe there's some way for me to get him to calm down a little so I can relax from time to time (or maybe walk a few steps without tripping over him lol)

I do wonder if maybe he was taken from his mother too early because of the hoarding situation. I thought maybe he could be so clingy because of that?

fluffybeard · Nov 21, 2013

Maybe it is cause he was taken too young. My kitty was orphaned at 4/5 weeks. He also suckles like mad, but he does it to a furry fleece blanket I sleep with every night. Maybe you can try redirecting his suckling to a furry blanket the smells like you?

lo-botomy · Nov 21, 2013

That isn't a bad idea. How would I teach him to do that? He usually will push aside fabric to get to my skin. Like he'll push a blanket aside or push my sleeve up.

di and bob · Nov 21, 2013

He will most likely calm down some as he gets older. Some cats get hypersensitive and over stimulated with too much petting and playing, you might want to try growling at him and ignoring him when he gets too bad, that's what mother cats do, and they leave the area! Right now, just try to enjoy all the attention, I knows it's hard, but when he's older and ignoring you you'll want some of that back!

fluffybeard · Nov 21, 2013

I think like Di and Bob said, just act like Mama cat. When cats wean their babies the babies don't often don't do it willingly and she has to give some tough love to let them know the milk train has left the station! I would do the same with the suckling and when he starts, tell him no and gently push him away. If he keeps coming back, get up and leave the area. He'll get the idea eventually and if he still needs to suckle, he can suckle a blanket.

katyellen · Nov 22, 2013

Hi, I have been looking for a post on the sucking problem. I got my cat from an animal shelter and found that she was already spayed by a rescue org. which probably means she was on the streets most of her life. I took her to the vet to confirm that she was spayed and also found that she was older than i thought. She is 1-11/2 yrs old (i thought she was 7 or 8 mths). Well, i have had her for about one month and she is a wonderful cat and she is trusting us more (except we can't reach for her yet) but she wants to nurse on my arms when i sit on the couch. Other than that she is great. I googled this and some say if it doesn't bother you to let it be and that she probably was taken away from her mama early. WELL, i gave it a try and its getting worse! So when i read the last post that said to wean her like mama cats do...well, it just seems like that will have to be the answer because she is wearing me out. So i am going to take the advice of fluffybeard and thankyou because i am getting desperate but i don't want her to think i don't love her. I think it is getting worse because i have been allowing it. Good luck with your cat. I hope you find a solution also.