4 month old kitten not playing and sad

[winkie]

Hello everyone,

I am new to this site...was searching for some answers to cats and landed on this site.

About two days ago I lost my 2 and half year old beautiful and loving cat. She used to go out in the night for walks and returned home by early dawn. Two days back she came a bit early around 12.30 pm. She had recently given birth to a male kitten who is now 4 months old. She came that day early and started playing with her son. But soon she again wanted to go out and she woke me up to open the door. I let her out again (I say its my fault) and I feel guilty now as why I let her out. She didnt returned that morning and I became worried. I went in the neighbourhood and enquired but couldn't find her. Then I thought to peep into the garbage bins on the streets and there I found my doll dead. She was laid on a clean plastic sheet, her mouth was little open and was lying as though fast asleep. She bore no wounds. I when looked at her body all over I only saw a small incision on her neck. there was no bleeding. God knows who killed her, dogs, men or some other male cat. I do not know. I am totally depressed and couldnt stop crying. I feel like she is around me. Also feel guilty as why i let her out otherwise she would have been saved.

Now her 4 month old kitten whom she was still nursing is sad and is not playing or talking with me. He hides and when I call him he does not react. He loved his mom very much both used to sleep and play together. I gave him milk but he rejected. Only he is taking boiled chicken which he used to take earlier too along with his mom. But he is sad and hisses at me if i force him to play. He justs sits at the door where his mom would come and look bitterly. And when I begin to cry loudly seeing this he comes near me but again goes away.

I am concerned as how will he survive if he will be dull and not talk. He is cute and innocent and does not know anything about this bad world. Also I am upset as I beleive i was the reason for her death as I let her out that night. Please help and advise. Thanks in advance.

 

[jennyr]

Hello and welcome to TCs. I am sorry it is in such sad circumstances. It is no good beating yourself up - what is done is done and you can only tell yourself you will learn from your mistakes. Many people on this board keep their cats as indoor companions only, but others do let them out. I have always made sure mine were inside at night, as I learnt the hard way that most accidents happen at night.

As for your kitten, of course he is grieving for his mom. Cats do grieve, sometimes for a long time. You should go out of your way to comfort him (as he can comfort you) talk to him, pet him, especially when he is looking for her. But the best thing to do would be to get him a new companion. I know that might seem hard right now for you, but it would probably get him out of his shell if he had another kitten his own age to play with. ANd if you live somehere that could be dangerous for cats then start now to keep them as indoor animals - they are young enough to accept it as normal. Let us know how you get on.

 

[StefanZ]

I agree with above.  He is grieving and thus sad. VERY natral.  It will come over after some time. During the time, you can and should try to help him. Let him grieve, and help him with your sympathy and company. He will appreciate this.

Another pal IS a good help to shorten this period and help him to "ignite" anew.   I would suggest you take in one from a shelter or similiar, who do need help, whom it is pity about.. Doing a good deed will help YOUR grieving.

Dont blame yourself.  If you want to have your cats as safe as possible, you do have them as indoor cats (like the little is, no?).

But once you do accept they can go outside, and they do - they are taking the risks of live.  This accident could essentially happen almost anytime...  So your letting her out once again didnt really mattered much.  A unluckly coincidence.

Good luck!

[the 4.000 thousends post]

 

[winkie]

Thanks Jennyranson for your kind reply...I cannot forget the fact that I had let her out and I am the cause of her death...my tears dont stop...today i bought new toys for the kitten but he didnt accepted..he just looked at them then hid under the bed and on calling not willing to come out..it can be good  to have a new kitten of his age to company him but here in India where I live people generally do not adopt cats as pets...it will be difficult for me to get one but I will surely see if I can get one. Right now my sweet kitten is hidden under the bed..and I cant stop crying..my heart cries as why I had let her out...I keep on looking at her pics. I dont like eating anything it seems something has come out from inside my body...thanks once again.

 

[winkie]

Thanks StefanZ for your kind reply.

 

[jennyr]

When i lived in Bosnia almost no-one had cats as pets, so I understand. But I rescued some street kittens and now I still have 4 ex-Bosnian cats living with me in France. I had a fifth, Napoleon, but he was poisoned by the action of a neighbour, and I felt terrible guilt that I had let him out. Five years later I stiill grieve for him. His brother grieved too for several months until a new kitten joined us, and he immediately 'adopted' her as his new best friend. They are still always together. So maybe you can find a kitten somewhere, though be careful not to let disease into the house - try to get a kitten seen by a vet before introducing it to your current kit. I had to go to the University to find a good vet in Sarajevo - That may be an idea for you. Good luck.

 

[winkie]

Thanks once again Jennyranson....I have talked among few pet stores for a kitten for adoption. They have asked me to call them in two days. Hope someone will help and I may get a kitten soon. My kitten is very quiet today. He didnt even took his food. Looks outside the window and at the close door for his mom. Anyone who opens the door he rushes to see if his mom has come :'(

Please pray to God that I am forgiven for the mistake I did.

 

[StefanZ]

Please pray to God that I am forgiven for the mistake I did.

My advice for you, as you are accusing yourself so hard, AND also mourning you too, is you dont buy from a pet shop, but try and find some cat whom you do rescue.  (as long as it is healthy - you dont want to have contagion onto your resident)

And or.

Or if you do buy this new cat because it it the quickest way -

you do also help someone else. Animal or human. 

Say a donation for a orphans home, or home for young mothers. Pay in your cats name.  Her name, your surname... Or just her name.  This way you will be sure her eternal soul will have peace.

Thus, IF it was a mistake or a sin you did, this sin will be forgiven.

Im entirely sure of this.

 

[bigperm20]

Yes, I agree with Stephan. Please try not to beat yourself up. If you find you are still haunted by feelings of wrongdoing. Make a donation to a charity of some type in the cat's name to make amends. It will make you feel better to honor her.

 

[donnamea]

You showed her your love by doing what she wanted. It is NOT your fault. These things happen in life . God has control over why they happen. Your kitten I'm sure is sensing your grief and feelings. You need to just show him (extra) love and peace at this time. God is in control of ALL of us. Peace and love to you. She had a great parent! God bless.

 

[winkie]

Thanks StefanZ, bigperm20 and Donnamea.  Yes I understand God has control but my heart doesnt agree right now...I will surely be doing as advised by you all. This night my kitten was very upset..meowed whole night sitting near the door. If I tried to take him on my lap he growled and hit me with his little hands. I even asked forgiveness from him...I was awake with him whole night..He has eaten less and justs rejects milk...tried to gave him egg that too he rejected...his eyes seem to ask so many questions...Right now he is sleeping in his basket. Will try to bring new kitten soon. Hope he adjusts with new baby...Thanks to all.

 

[bigperm20]

As far as his not eating you need to provide him with something he is going to find irresistible. Do they sell ANY canned cat food in India? Forgive my ignorance, but you already stated that not many people keep cats as pets. (Another member here lives in The Philippines. and they only carried 2 varieties of canned food in stores there.)

If you can provide kitty with some really "stinky" canned food he will eat. Cats eat based on what food smells like. I don't think boiled chicken has enough of a smell to entice him. Just a thought.

 

[winkie]

Thanks bigperm20...I found only two pet stores that have Whiskas cat food with only two flavors.. Here in India people are very superstitious..where I live no one has cat as pets..there is hardly any sale of cat food according to pet stores. But I will try cat food of Whiskas if it is lately packed one.....as of adopting a new kitten I called the People for Animals society today..have heard they provide orphan pets for adoption..their guy told me that he will let me know by evening today if they have a orphan kitten..Thanks once again to all of you for being with me and listening me at the time of grief...

 

[StefanZ]

.He has eaten less and justs rejects milk...tried to gave him egg that too he rejected...

What milk are you giving him? Cow milk?

Try with goat milk. Very nourishing for cats, and possibly more appetizing as it smells a little more.

The yellow of eggs added into the goat milks makes it even more nourishing.

Can you give the eggs (yellow) raw or do you must cook it?

If he doesnt eats, the time may come when you must forcefeed him.

A thing you can try, is to wrap him in a thick towel. Immobilized and helpless, he will be submissive, and let you do what you need to do.

Wrapped up, you can hold him to your chest, carry him around, talking friendly in soft voice. singing in a soft voice..You can do it perhaps even one hour.    It may be a fantastic nice and enriching experience for you both.

This trick is sometimes used in fostering young, ferale born cats, for a quicker and easier fostering

(ie fostering of homeless kittens born outside, born by homeless moms).

It is also used with home cats if they hate to have nails clipped.  Or must be forcefeed and dont like it.

So it is a mild trick. Doesnt harm them, there is no violence, and they really doesnt mind.

Good luck!     *vibes*

 

[winkie]

Thanks StefanZ..I am giving cow milk...never tried goat's milk..will surely try it...Eggs I give boiled mashed...his mom used to love omelette cooked in tsp olive oil and noodles. I will force feed if he resists now...today he came upto me and meowed holding me...I am waiting call from People for Animals if they can provide me an orphan kitten...Thanks once again.

 

[winkie]

Hello everyone, People for Animals called me yesterday and they gave address of a person who has rescued orphaned kittens. The kittens are one month old...six in number, all female...they are malnoursihed as they didnt get mom's milk and also two of them have less of fur.....shall i go to adopt one of them..will age difference cause adjustment problems...my kitten has started taking food and also comes to me though for few minutes but he comes and meows and plays for little while then again starts crying for his mom...he is total NO to milk...Today is the fifth day of my sweet doll's death....please advise shall I adopt one of those one month kitten...

 

[Willowy]

Well, they need to stay with their sisters for another month. . .don't adopt a kitten under 2 months old. I hope the foster home is bottlefeeding them properly. If you get a female, be sure to have them de-sexed (your male will be much nicer and happier if castrated, and if the female isn't de-sexed there will be manymany kittens, and if it's so hard to find homes for them in India you don't want that) before the female is 4 months old.

 

[StefanZ]

Well, they need to stay with their sisters for another month. . .don't adopt a kitten under 2 months old.

Yeah. The best would be if the rescuer do keeps them togehther at least one month. So they do have company of each other. And for himher it is almost the same work to take care of weakish, small kittens. She learns herself a lot along the way. While if they are send to different new homes, it means 6 different persons must each do their outmost. A couple of them will probably fail, as it is hard work to save so small, weakish, sickly kittens.

I seem to read between lines, you are not so sold on the idea of being a great savior and rescuer? Am I right?

Although you want company for your kitten. 

Right, You dont need to be rescuer yourself. If you do want to do a good deed, you can donate, you can help in other ways too. You dont need to yourself rescue a cat whom it is pity about.

But you CAN contact this rescuer, and tip herhim what we tell = best if she can keep them together till they are 8 weeks.  (10 is even better, but it would be to ask too much).

You can also  promise you will take one or perhaps even two of them, when they are 8 weeks, if such is your wish.

OK. IF you decide to take one or even two.

This will be hard work as they are malnourished and weakish.  You will not be sure they will survive.

Make sure to keep your resident and this newcomer apart at least two weeks, so you are sure there is no contagion.

(And of course, the little one is too weak to play as now).

Try to get a vet to check it up.  (will surely cost). Deworming, defleasing too if it is not done yet.

A vet check up is always recommended with a new cat or dog. But here double good.

One tip. Use goat milk as food for the little one.  Tell also the tip to the rescuer...

Later on you will go into more solid foods.

Of buyed cat foods, wet foods (canned cat food) are often better than dry cat food.  another little tip.  

Good luck!

 

[winkie]

Thanks Willowy and StefanZ for your advise...I have given donations at few places and also feeding some lepers and stray dogs....Also had prayers for my doll...I will advise the rescuer to bottlefeed the kittens (which I think he is not doing) and help them in feeding to the best possible way.....I certainly dont wish that my healthy kitten gets infected by them so I will drop the idea of having those..Thanks once again.

 

[bigperm20]

Thanks Willowy and StefanZ for your advise...I have given donations at few places and also feeding some lepers and stray dogs....Also had prayers for my doll...I will advise the rescuer to bottlefeed the kittens (which I think he is not doing) and help them in feeding to the best possible way.....I certainly dont wish that my healthy kitten gets infected by them so I will drop the idea of having those..Thanks once again.

I would think the new kitten would most likely be fine as long as you are willing to seperate the new kitten for a few weeks. You could take it to a vet to be de-wormed, inoculated, and tested during that time.

I would also think that since the cat population is so small there, contagious diseases among felines would be far less prevalent. Just a thought...