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How does a kitten pick a favorite?

post #1 of 11
Thread Starter 
Recently, my gf and I got a kitten together. He's pretty playful with both of us at times, but he's definitely taking a liking to my gf more. He tends to follow her around more as well as sit on her lap.

As silly as it sounds, I'm actually starting to feel a bit jealous about this. It's no fun when you feel like you care about the pet as much as someone else, but the pet likes you less. Anyways, was wondering if there's anything I can do to help the situation, or if it's pretty hard to control who the cat picks as the favorite. And once they establish a favorite, is that pretty much set in stone?

We both take turns feeding him, and we try to spread out playtime with him evenly, so I'm not quite sure what else I can do. Maybe once he gets neutered he'll like her less?
post #2 of 11
I'm interested to hear what people have to say about this. The only time I've had cats in a multi-person household was when I was growing up; the cats always liked me best. But it was essentially quiet teenage me vs. two screeching richocheting little kids, so I don't think there was much of a contest there
post #3 of 11
Zakk likes hubby over me- cuddles with him at night, usually not me. I do most of the feeding and cleaning and probably most of the playing as of late. I have some theories as to why, and I'll start with the most likely.

1. He pets zakk more gently than I do and zakk prefers this.
2 Hubby is quieter and in general more calm then me.
3. Hubby moves around less.
4. When we first got zakk hubby was out of work and had more bonding time.

Try not to take it personally.. Luckily we have 4 cats. One seems to prefer me a bit more, though it isn't as obvious. The other two are equal, I think.
post #4 of 11
I think it all depends on how much you are involved in the care of your kitty-the hand who feeds them is the one they are obviously going to prefer more. Out of our 6 most tend to prefer my husband more and I do all the work-before we got married we each had 2-his seems to prefer me more and Melody who was mine loves to lay on his lap but NEVER mine-I also seem to think that their preferences change occasionally. Ginger never used to come near me and now she will only lay with me and play with me. Uno I think will only ever love me as he is one of the most scared cats I have ever seen-I am not sure if it is a one eyed thing or what! Try and keep playing with the kitten and giving treats and maybe in time your kitten will learn to play with you more, just don't get discouraged if he/she never does, it doesn't mean you love it any less right?
post #5 of 11
I have to agree. My girls seems to be more affectionate with me,, because I pet them and feed them and clean out their litter box. Though when I give them medicine,, they tend to go towards my husband, because they get mad at me. I learned that after a medicine or something like that to instantly feed them a can of wet cat food (their favs), and they love me again!!!

I get jealous too.. I love my girls.. My Angel loves to sleep with my daughter though,, I think Angel feels safer with my 4yo near her,, I really think she is protecting her. As for Chestnut,, she loves to sleep right beside me, and my husband, and enjoys all kinds of attention!!
post #6 of 11
3 of mine switch back and forth. One day they will be all over me, and the next day they are his babies. Fluffy is his baby, though she is sweet to me, she obviously prefers him. He rescued her from a horrible fate, so I am not at all surprised.
post #7 of 11
Bijou has a different relationship with each of us. He wants to be with my husband when he's outside working on the cars - he sits on the engine and watches him or he'll sit on the car seat if hubby is working on something with the car doors open. But at bedtime, he will only suckle my neck and sleep cuddled up with me so he keeps us both happy since my husband wouldn't be able to sleep with a cat's face all over his and sharing his pillow.

Why don't you get yourself another cat - a nice little female for you to love! Honestly since Mika came into our lives (through our daughter moving back home), I cannot imagine having only one cat ever again whereas before I never contemplated ever having more than one. We reiterate on a daily basis how much joy having them both around brings us.
post #8 of 11
I do all the feeding, Rob does all the brushing, we are equal opportunity scritchers. And the bonding is Suzy and Fawn are Daddy's Girls and Cindy is Mummy's Girl. Haven't any idea how that transpired, it just did.
post #9 of 11
I think it also depends on the character & background of the cat
If they are well socialised during kitten-hood, then they are usually friendly as adult cats. As to who they pick, well thats defo a character thing also they do have moods, so if you´ve done something to naff your kitty off, well you´ve had it
My 3 cats come to both of us for different things, usually my hubby feeds them in the morning, so he gets all the attention then !!! My eldest cat Big Guy Dino, is a out and out Mummies Boy and hes always by my side. The other two - girls - well they only come to me when they decide they want attention (or food ! )
You can obviously tell now who your kitty preferes to be with, so.............well adopt another
post #10 of 11
I do all the feeding, treat giving, watering, and litter cleaning. Of course I also do all the medicine giving, nail trimming, and soft claw applying. Yes, by myself....and yes, it IS hard Brian doesn't want a part in anything that "hurts" Anya. He's afraid she'll get mad at him. Guess I'll be the disciplinarian when we have human babies.

Yet even though all of that is one sided, she still switches back and forth as to who she "likes". Often she can't decide and will run back and forth in between the two of us rubbing up on our faces.

We play with her equally I would say, but I'm home more for that quality time. I honestly don't know why she will sometimes choose one over the other, but then again, why do humans often want to be around one person more than the other. Maybe sometimes Brian and I just get on her nerves.
post #11 of 11
Thread Starter 
Thanks a bunch for all the advice! I guess at the end of the day, it's not really in our control who our cat likes. The most I can do is just play with him and see if he warms up to me more.

Sometimes it's frustrating because I feel like I don't know what I should do to gain more of his affection. I enjoy holding him and petting him, but he's not always in the mood for that, or gets bored of it quickly. So sometimes I wonder if it's better if I DON'T pet him and just give him his space. It's like I'm tight-roping a fine line between doing enough so that he'll learn to bond with me without doing too much where he becomes bored/annoyed at me.
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