Tonight my town had a big fireworks display. We were going to watch it from the roof of one of the buildings close to the set off point. Sounds like fun, right?
What I didn't realize was that to get to the roo of the 5 or 6 floor building, we had to crawl from one building to another. Through a small window, across about 3 empty feet of nothing but air all the way to the ground.
I am not afraid of much, and I am fairly strong. I panicked. I could not even lift myself out of the window to try to get across the chasm. I lost every ounce of strength in me, and I thought my heart would leap out of my chest.
I apologized profusely to my friends and fiance. Now he is acting like I should be in a leper colony. He walked home, about 8 to 10 blocks, and got upset when I tried to talk to him about it.
I know physically I could have done it, but mentally no way. And somehow I am the bad guy in this. I am really angry and upset.
I was still shaking when I got home, 15 minutes after refusing to crawl out the window. We could have watched the fireworks from the ground, but noooo, someone has to sulk about it like a child.
I am very disappointed in him right now, he is usually a kind and sensitive guy. I mean, he loves the cats as much as I do, and cried as much as I did when we had one of them put to sleep a few months ago. Anyway, I just wanted to vent. Actually, a good cry would do me good, too. I think he thinks that I don't trust him to watch out for me, but it's not that. It was panic, pure and simple.
What I didn't realize was that to get to the roo of the 5 or 6 floor building, we had to crawl from one building to another. Through a small window, across about 3 empty feet of nothing but air all the way to the ground.
I am not afraid of much, and I am fairly strong. I panicked. I could not even lift myself out of the window to try to get across the chasm. I lost every ounce of strength in me, and I thought my heart would leap out of my chest.
I apologized profusely to my friends and fiance. Now he is acting like I should be in a leper colony. He walked home, about 8 to 10 blocks, and got upset when I tried to talk to him about it.
I know physically I could have done it, but mentally no way. And somehow I am the bad guy in this. I am really angry and upset.
I am very disappointed in him right now, he is usually a kind and sensitive guy. I mean, he loves the cats as much as I do, and cried as much as I did when we had one of them put to sleep a few months ago. Anyway, I just wanted to vent. Actually, a good cry would do me good, too. I think he thinks that I don't trust him to watch out for me, but it's not that. It was panic, pure and simple.
