More than just cat problems, need help in understand and advice

I just wanted to say, good luck on finding a new place for you and your precious princess! You really sound like a wonderful man that has had some bad luck lately but very together! Let us know how you are doing! Enjoy your visit Sunday!

I know how you feel and its awfel how things have turned out. But if you can visit often or maybe even have your brother bring the kitten over for a visit, it will help both of you.

Hope you guys can work something out soon so you won't have to be apart anymore

Hey everyone Im back. No real update as of yet, but more or less considering moving back to moms until the Holidays are over and some of my bills are paid off. I have to also appear in court to tell my side of what happend when my ex left. The landlord is going after her for breaking the lease. For me he understands and is letting me go because he would do the same if he was me. I cant have my cat come over here to visit goldenkitty45 I would have to go there, because no cats here otherwise shed be here living with us. I may just get move home for several reasons right now. I am paying half rent at the old place and giving my friend 225 a month here. Plus trying to pay my bills too and plus storage. I figured if I move home at least until first of the year Jan or Feb I can move out on my own. He may not like it but if he is a good friend he will understand. If not not my problem. Why add the extra expenses on bills if I dont have to? With paying him and storage every month plus trying to catch up on my bills and paying the old landlord my half while trying to save? It wont happen...this way if I move home I will be out sooner than later. Plus now my friend / roomie tells me his brother cant build me a ramp as he said he would before I moved in. So which means anytime I want to go somewhere or have appts. I have to wait until he comes home from work! Thank God he gets off work at 11am and gets home around noon. He dont drive and were both about the same age. So there are pros and cons to everything and right now I have written down pros and cons here and at my moms. And there are more cons then pros here and more Cons at my moms. I lived with her once before where shes at and its more suitable for me. I have to go to her house to take a damn shower and I cant just take one when I feel like it I have to wait. I really appreciate my friend taken me in and wanting to help, but right now his place is VERY VERY SMALL.

As long as I can see my cat often so she knows im around and still there for her that when I am ready to move out I can get her back sooner than later. Oh yeah my friend said also tells me now that instead of us moving out in March or April. His landlord is very strict and particular about things. So we may have to stay a whole year. I cant handle a whole year here becaues of the inconvience. Plus I would move out at least 6 or 8 months on my own anyways...I just dont want to keep moving the kitty around all the time, but I think if she knows that if we move this next time she is coming with...Until further notice of where I am at and what I am doing I probably wont post until then.
I do want to thank each and everyone of you for your heartfelt warm welcome and comments and concerns. I stumbled upon this site on accident and I am glad I did. You all are great people and once again, thank you for everything.

Oops I screwed up on my pros and cons lol...but I think you all know what I mean. But just incase there would be more pros at my moms than cons, and more cons here where I am at now. So thats what I may do.

yeah I lied said I wouldnt post anything else until then. Or is it just that Im blonde and polish? Scary combination. (no offense to other blondes out there or polish people. I am one too I slam myself too in good fun so hush. ) anyways talk to you all later.

Cats definitely know their owner.

My boy Alfie absolutely adores me and Nick (my other half) but whenever any of my friends come over, his tail goes straight between his legs and he runs and hides.

Also, when I come home from work, my two come straight up to me.

I know they aren't as complex as humans and they don't get depressed like we do. But they do know their owner.

As someone mentioned, give her something with your scent on, so when she sleeps its near her and she wont foget your smell.

It's so nice to read a post from someone who so obviously loves their cat so much. It was a really heart warming post in that sense.

I am so sorry everything else has happened that made you have to move in the first place.

Thank you Pompeyvix! Yeah I called ask my brother if they use my shirt so she can sleep on it. He said it was down in the basement and shes been down there. To me I dont think they really tried. Makes me mad. Now I am supposed to go over Sunday, tried to call him but he went to work, so I talked to his girlfriend. She said she didnt know anything about it. Right there that tells me I probably wont be going Sunday. THey are too much into their own world. I told her well you guys agreed to keep my cat for awhile until i can find a place and you metioned I could come over often to see her. YEah when?? He doesnt work Sunday so I should be able to go over. Other than that now i have more problems. I do work on my computer from home. I do graphic arts and web design also teach online. Now my computer that had all my info on it. Is now gone. For some reason my motherboard just decided to crap out on me. Found out by 2 companies today that they are going to find someone else because I told them it will be about 2 more weeks before I can get up and running again. So I lost out on that Luckily tho I have a friend who has his own computer company in town and hes going to build me a new one and said I can make payments and I can get it within by next Friday. The day after I move back to my moms. So, I will have a lot of work ahead of me. Here I am trying to make money so I can pay bills and catch up quick and then save to move. Now something else. I guess as they say, bad things come in 3s...I think i beat the record with over 3 in a row bad things. UGH! Oh well I guess I have to think positive in order for positive things to happen. If I think negative then Ill get negative. (closing eyes) cooooome oooon positive!!!!

Hey all just thought I would update you on whats been going on. First off I was supposed to go to my brothers This Past Sunday and he canceled. So I didnt get to see my cat. He had some lame excuse as he always does. So yeah I am very upset and angry because he promised and then even offers but to turn around to cancel on me just because he was going to be working outside if it was nice. Which it wasnt here but then he used the excuse that his Girlfriend wasnt feeling so hot. She does this anytime our family wants to come just to visit and then only asks...Why doesnt your family come over? They dont like me... (roll eyes)..
Now for the 2nd part. I belong to Jaycees here in town its a non profit organization where we help out our community. Well I got my ex gf involved with them a few years ago. Now after she did what she did to me about 2 or 3 weeks ago. I get a call from someone saying that she wants to attend the meeting to give her vote. But wont attend if it would make me feel uncomfortable. But this is coming from a lady who took my ex off her list because she didnt want anything to do with her after what she did.. Only to turn around add her again and inivite her to the meeting and my ex accepts and said she planned on attending as long as I wasnt there so I wouldnt feel so uncomfortable. This is coming from an ex who said shed like to get more involved but only then decided while we were together that she really didnt want to be involved with Jaycees. Now here she wants to go to make my life more miserable. I already told them that if she shows I will wheel home. So right now I am moving back with my mom Thursday and I dont want her to know. I know this is a cat forum but as I said I would update on what was going on. As you see it hasnt gotten any better. As I told a few people if she would have just kept our bargain and broke up with me and wanted to continue being friends great! But she left me high and dry by packing up when I leave and come home to nothing to go back to her ex's. And 2nd time shes done this wont let me get a blood test to see if the babys mine. Its always her exs not mine. So, I told Jaycees if she continues to try to get involved with Jaycees I am no longer a member or on the board. I dont want anything to do with someone who is going to disrespect me like she did. And for her to do this wanting to go to the meetings? That takes real guts for someone to do that and to say that she doesnt want to make ME feel uncomfortable?? yeah it would but also it should her after what she did. Just goes to show ya that she DOESNT care as she proclaims to do so. I guess my friend and I are going to try to find a place by March to get a place. So it may be March or April that I will get my princess back.

Hi again. Isn't there some law about the blood test - can you get a Legal Aid lawyer (sorry that's what we call them in Canada... when you don't have to pay) to get an injunction or something to force it? You have a right to know if it's your baby! Really, really hope your luck changes soon!

I believe Larke's right -- you do have a right to that test. However, it occurs to me that your ex may be wanting the baby to belong to her new partner because he (I assume) can be required to pay child support... whereas you, because of your disability, may not be expected to do so. Just a guess -- I may be completely wrong.

As for the Jaycees... I think you should remain on the board, go to the meetings, and show yourself to be the bigger person. Your purpose in belonging to the Jaycees is community service -- focus on that, rather than on any petty personal issues that might come up. YOU show up at the meeting, and let HER decide whether SHE's comfortable being there too.

And I'm glad you're getting out of your present situation. Your mom will no doubt be glad to have you home, and when you get your kitty back... well, that sounds like heaven! :-)

All good wishes...

Well currently she isnt dating anyone from what she said in her good bye letter. She said she just wants it to be her and her kids and move out on their own. Yeah right I heard that a 100 times in the past 5 yrs since Ive known her. Because she wants some man to take care of her and pay for everything she even admited she wanted to be a stay at home mom and not have to worry about the bills. I saw that all first hand. I told her this day and age good luck finding a man like that. Todays society is so messed up it takes 2 to bring in the bread. If it was that easy I would do it for her because I loved her. But it just aint going to happen. As for Jaycees maybe sunday on election day I should go for president..and when I get voted in...I can point at a few people and say, "Your gone your outta here, bUH BYE NOW!" AND to my such wonderful ex. "Your outta here dont come here we dont need ya." ITs how I feel and I probably would do that too. Thats the thing about Princess or any cat they make you feel better with them around! When she left us and it was just the Kitten and I for a week she would always be there she knew i was upet.
As for the baby oh yeah she did this to me before she isnt doing it to me again. I said Im not doing this to you to get you back. I am doing this for the baby and my sake. Especially the babies. The baby doesnt have to look like me for it not to be mine! I told her that its not right for the baby to grow up thinking someone else is his dad when that may not be the case. I will get a blood test!
As for the disability she knew what she was getting into. She knew finanicals thats what makes me mad. Although have a job after I finish college which is garunteed and off SSI. Woohoo! Ok for now Gonna go..thanks for the post.

I am so sorry you are going through this. What a terrible feeling, I'm sure. I think that your kitty will be stressed and confused because of the change, but I don't think she will miss you in the way that you imagine. She won't understand what is going on, and even though she may be attached to you, she has no experience needed to understand and assess the situation. She doesn't know when you're coming back, or even that you're leaving for longer than you usually do--and she probably has very little concept of time anyway. Their thought processes aren't as intricate as ours--fortunately for them.

Don't beat yourself up over it. As long as a cat's needs are met, it doesn't matter whom they are met by. I'm sure her needs are being met at the loving home your brother is providing her.

Ooh...seems I was a bit late. good luck with everything...

Originally Posted by hyperspazz

...Todays society is so messed up it takes 2 to bring in the bread...

Click to expand...

I hear ya, brother. I'm hoping and praying the societal pendulum will start swinging back the other way soon...