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Anybody out there?

post #1 of 23
Thread Starter 
My daughter is at a friend's house tonight, and of course Jim isn't here, so I'm all by myself. I've done the shopping and called everyone I can afford to call, and I could sure use a chat. Thought someone else might be puttering around online . . .
post #2 of 23
Hey there. I'm lurking about online. Was just Yahoo IMing a friend on the West Coast.
See, you're never really alone .
post #3 of 23
Im on-line, Sunlion!
post #4 of 23
Hey Sunlion! How ya doing?
post #5 of 23
Thread Starter 
Just putting away groceries. It was $60, and it was mostly snack food for the kid! I mean, no meat at all and only a few vegetables, those snacks are expensive! I guess I didn't used to pay attention.

Computer froze, had to restart.

Fred is trying very hard to get out. He isn't bonding with the other boys, and I think he misses his old people. Fortunately he doesn't get very far before I catch him. I just opened the door to let Blackie in, and Fred ran to the door but it was already closed. I swear he actually said "Let me out!"

There is a tremendous draft around the window near me. I was thinking I might sleep on the sofa with the tv on, but maybe not, I don't know.
post #6 of 23
My own grocery bill can get crazy if I buy too much junk food. To think there was a time when I gave all of that stuff up. Now, I try not to buy as much, I wait for it to go on sale, and I look for coupons. Can you limit the snacks your daughter eats...or are you trying to appease her when she asks too many 'what ifs' and 'why nots' ?
I guess you really need to keep an eye on your Fred. My kitty was a street cat, and he still whistfully looks out to the outside world. He doesn't usually try to escape...which is a good thing since I have a balcony door and live pretty high up. He did, however, once dart into the hallway of my apt bldg. And, when we went on a trip he escaped out of the hotel room. But, he seems to be confused enough when he hears me shriek and sees me bounding after him that he stops long enough for me to scoop him up .
I pretty much live with the TV on. A friend and I theorize that we use it to keep us company. I also think it's the major contibutor to a high electric bill! So, it's good to have a purrball around - more interactive than the TV and more fun a plant .
post #7 of 23
Thread Starter 
Actually, the junk food is an eating bribe. She is on the small side for her age (she's a 5 or 6 in height which is average, but she still fits into her size 4T shirts and shorts, so she is pretty slender. She doesn't look underweight when she's naked, not all bony and stuff and her little belly pooches out like kids' do, but next to other kids she looks fragile. Ooh, and she's wiry, she can lift and carry things that other kids can't. But she would live on sugar and chips if I let her. So we do a lot of "if you want Jell-O you need to eat an apple first" kind of stuff. And she likes mostly fat-free kind of snacks, like marshmallows or popsicles, so I don't feel bad about giving them to her, but I sure wish she'd eat more meat and veg and less sweet.

I did sleep on the sofa and it was the first time all week I slept. Seven consecutive hours, woo-hoo! So I think I'm going to need to get a radio or a small tv for the bedroom so I'm not bothered by all the house noises. Don't know when I'll have the money for it, but I need to sleep.
post #8 of 23
Er, not to be bossy or know-it-all, or whatever, but it's not a good idea to use food as a reward or bribe. It distorts kids images of food and can lead to bad eating habits, eating disorders, and obesity. I was runt-like as a kid, but my mom always dealt with it by never forcing me to eat. Her theory was I'd eat if I was hungry. She was right.
post #9 of 23
I can't sleep either, Sunlion. I found out by accident about leaving the t.v. on with low volume, and that has been a blessing. I am still recovering from a month in the hospital, and I can't afford to go without enough sleep. I need extra! Precious, my Siamese, is not helping. She insists on sleeping on the couch with me-- on my arm and the few inches left on the couch beside my face. She's never eaten a mouse, but she has what I call mouse breath. She's so sweet that I don't want to move her, but I'm not above moving around to make her slightly less comfortable. Yes, I'm that desperate! I usually blame insomnia on the full moon, but that's over. Now what?
post #10 of 23
Thread Starter 

If it was behavior, that would be one thing. But it's entirely a food issue. My daughter will eat, but she asks for "snacks" exclusively. She will gladly eat: jello, popsicles, cookies, snack cakes, popcorn, chips, taffy, chocolate though not all kinds of chocolate, pudding, ice cream, coke, lollipops, pop tarts, fruit roll ups and variations of that, etc. She will eat as little as possible of meat, fruit and vegetables, even tho' we have talked about the need to eat different kinds of food to keep her body healthy. ("But a brownie IS different from fruit snacks!") So the usual method right now is, if she wants a snack she needs to eat a healthy food in order to get it. It's just like us adults having the self-discipline to eat dinner before desert, except small children don't have SELF-discipline so it needs to come from outside sources. A yogurt before animal crackers, some canned peaches and then a rice krispies bar. I don't feel bad about this. I do not use food to bribe her to behave well, nor do I withhold food to punish.

Jeanie, I just wish I had a tv in my bedroom. I was in hotel once ages ago with tv that had a timer, and that would be perfect. Imagine, set it for an hour and after you fall asleep it turns itself off. Maybe someday!
post #11 of 23
Hi Allison,

I doubt you are still on line but I'm here just in case you hapen to be lurking. I noticed your last post was 9:30ish and now it 11:00 ish. This is one of my few times that I come on while I am at home. I don't really have much time to be on at home but hubby left for work about 45 minutes ago and I started thinking about the site and here I am!
post #12 of 23
Thread Starter 
Is it still called lurking when you are on another site while watching for the e-mail notice that someone posted?:tounge2:

Your husband sure works a late shift! Or maybe it isn't so late where you are . . .
post #13 of 23

I'm in Houston so we are in the same time zone. How about this weather, weird or what! By lurking I mean surfing the board un-noticed, like not showing that you are logged on or being on but not having posted in a while. I'm sorry you are having trouble sleeping. Even though I have not gone through what you are I can kinda relate it to my ex-boyfriend of 3 1/2 while I was in college. When everything hit the fan sleep was something that didn't exist for me.
post #14 of 23
Thread Starter 
You know, even tho' this is the only time I've been married, I've had 2 other boyfriends for about 5 years, and when I broke up with them it was also very upsetting. (Hey, maybe I just have a relationship cycle of 5 years? I should take that into account when I start something . . .) I've actually had insomnia for quite some time now, but this makes it worse. Can't sleep when there's nobody else in the house.

How do you sleep when hubby's at work?
post #15 of 23
Pretty easily actually. I only have problems on Sunday night because I sleep in on the weekends. This may sound funny but I actually sleep better without him. When he is in the bed I feel crowded and he wants to cuddle in one position and not move. It's not that I don't like cuddling, I just don't want to do it the whole time we are sleeping. I need my space when I sleep. I move a lot in my sleep and he is like a rock.

I actually had insomnia for almost my entire relationship with my ex. I had a terrible time sleeping. When it all ended I had a nervous breakdown and my parents had to take me to the doctor. I found out that for most of our relationship I was in a major depression and a symptom of it was the insomnia. I don't know why I didn't recognize I was depressed or that I was in a relationship that needed ending, I guess I just didn't want to be alone and I found that more frightening. I'm not trying to say that you are depressed I just know that when you have a lot of stuff and concerns on you mind, sleep can be very difficult whether those toughts are due to depression or other life issues that a person faces.
post #16 of 23
Thread Starter 
I'm sure I'm mildly depressed. Jim has depression and one of the symptoms of that for family members is mild situational depression. It generally clears up when the depressed person is gone.

But I've had trouble sleeping all my life, it's just better when there's someone else there. Roommates are also effective for me, but imagine the ad: "Roommate wanted to act as sleeping pill. Dont' be offended if I fall asleep around you." lol
post #17 of 23
I was reading the daily thread and want to know what in the world is tivo? It seems everybody knows but me!

Is your daughter in kindergarten this year or will that be next year or are you home schooling?
post #18 of 23
Lol! What about getting some audio tapes of someone talking or some of those tranquility tapes of the sounds of nature like rain or the ocean? I have also heard that there are certain foods you can eat close to bedtime that help people sleep. I know you aren't supposed to eat close to bedtime but I think some of the foods I have heard about were fruits and I don't think that would be bad to eat before bed.
post #19 of 23
Thread Starter 
Yeah, my little girl homeschooled kindergarten this year. I'll be going back to work tho' now that Jim is gone. I mean, he says he'll support us and even gave me pocket money the other day, but I can't count on that lasting, it's probably mostly guilt. And of course my pocket money and personal bill are the thing he'll resent soonest, for obvious reasons. So she will likely finish the school year at public school once I'm working, and I don't know what we're going to do after that. I'm more concerned about next month's rent than anything else right now, you know?

Tivo is like a vcr with a hard drive instead of a tape. It records what you ask it too, and you can program it once to record a whole season (or longer). Plus, it keeps track of what you watch and will record things it thinks you're interested in without being asked, if there's room in the memory. Pretty cool.

Sugar actually puts me to sleep very effectively, but I wake up with a wicked hangover the next morning. It's an early sign of diabetes, so I think it's not a good idea for 2 reasons.
post #20 of 23
You never know, he may be happy to give money if it's going to help his little girl. Dads are very mushy when it comes to their daughters. I'm about to have a big meezer join me on the key board. There is a good side to public school if that's what you end up having to do. It will really provide an energy outlet for her which will help you!
post #21 of 23
Well, I'm getting sleepy, finally, so it's off to bed. Plus I have to be up at 5:30!!!!! See ya on the boards in a couple of hours. Hang in there and try to catch some zzzz's.
post #22 of 23
Hi, again, Sunlion. Well, it's Monday, but I had some info I thought might be helpful. I am sleeping in the living room because it's a large room and I need everything nearby. I have a breathing problem, and when I get a cold or bronchitis, my family sets up a "mini-hospital" in here. I stay here until my breathing improves. So I had an excuse to buy a small, second t.v. Last year I saw a 19inch remote control Philips Magnavox on sale at Ames for $159, give or take $10. It has the feature you want, but I have never used it. I think I'll try it. If I awaken to go the bathroom I can't go back to sleep, no matter how early it is. I've been trying to take afternoon naps to help make up for the lost sleep, and using the t.v. then. I hope that info helpful. By the way, when my husband and I separated, I took a nap every afternoon, just so I wouldn't have to think--even though I knew I couldn't continue the way things were. It's hard. I wish you the best.
post #23 of 23
Sunlion, I didn't mean to jump on you. You made a good point about dessert, and I'll admit that I can be just as bad as a kid! Animal crackers actually aren't bad. Sounds like you're doing a great job.

On sleeping...try not to! That works best for me. Trying to go to sleep keeps me up, but if I want to stay up to watch a program or read a book, forget about it! I'm out like a light. Taking a warm bath before bed can help as well. My mom has had luck with an herb called valerian root.
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