Help Please...New Cat

Hello. I am a new member to this site. I am not sure if this is where I should be posting this.

We adopted a mom and baby(boy) about 3 or 4 years ago. We decided that maybe we would want another cat for the boy to play around with. So we went and picked one out, she is only 2 years old and very sweet around us. When we first brought her home, we let the other two cats sniff her carrier and they seemed really interested, no hissing or anything. We found out that our new cat had earmites, so we had to quarantine her for awhile, but our two original cats knew that she existed. After the new cat was better, we introduced them slowly...things went pretty good. A little bit of hissing between the two females. Then our male cat would be interested and the new cat would hiss at him and he would run away, but would continue to come to her. It stayed like that for about a week or so, and then the new cat would start to hiss and swat at the male cat...then a few days later she would do it to our female cat. If anything we thought that our original cats would be the ones to hiss and maybe swat at the new cat...but it seems that the new cat is the one starting the fights. She is a sweetheart around us...but now is starting to attack both cats. Chasing them and jumping on them...in our eyes this is not a good thing.

So...we don't know what to do. Take her back, to a no kill shelter or wait and see how things go. Seems like things are getting worse and worse. She is an adorable and sweet cat...and we think maybe she would be better as an only cat.

Any suggestions on how to get them to calm down or advice on what to do would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

You've only had her a little while. I'd give the new kitty come time. My cats took LOTS of time making friends, and now they love each other dearly. My website has a bit of info on Introductions.

I wouldn't worry! Ive had Finnegan since october and Shadow still doesn't like him all the time.. lol

I don't think she is doing it because she is mean. She probably just wants to be an alpha cat.

You might want to separate them again for about two weeks and then begin a gradual re-introduction. Chances are that starting over might break the cycle of aggression. Check out the threads at the top of the Behavior Forum where you will find information on how to introduce a new cat to resident cats.

I've been rereading your OP trying to figure out how long this has been going on. You didn't say exactly (or I keep overlooking it), but I gather it's just been a short while. A separation followed by reintroduction could work. So, basically, just ditto what lotsocats said.

Thanks to all of you who have written me and given your feedback, I really appreciate it. To answer your question...the cats have only been introduced for a little over a week or so. I guess my concern was that their relationship wasn't getting better or even staying the same - but was getting worse. I also don't want my other two cats to hate us for bringing in this third cat that attacks them

We have seperated them for now, and we try a reintroduction in a week or so and see how it goes...

Thanks again for all the responses and I will post updates...

We had our first cat for a year with no other animals and then we brought home a little kitten and it took a week for her to warm up to him. Then we had those two cats for a year and we adopted a stray, the stray had 5 kittens 3 months ago and now they are all starting to get along.

So it just takes time, some cats need more time then others. But one thing, don't show one cat more attention then another or they will get jelous!!

Well, we tried to introduce our cats together again. We started with them all eating some softfood. That went well, but then our male cat (Achilles) started smelling the new cat (Nyx) and ran and hid under the bed. He has been there pretty much ever since. Nyx ran after him under the bed and kept hissing and stuff, but she hasn't really attacked him. Our femal cat (Iris) and Nyx have been after each other pretty much the whole time. Last night, all three cats were in the same room, without bothering each other, Nyx under the bed, Achilles on the sideof the bed and Iris on the bed. They seem to be "okay" alone, but when one of us is in the picture, Nyx chases after our other cats, Iris and Achilles. It is a tough decision. It is really hard to watch Iris and Achilles scared to walk around the house, jump on the bed with us, etc. It is really hard to watch and we feel bad for them. I know that this process takes time...but I don't like watching our original cats suffer. Nyx is fine when it is jus us..but if you involve any of the other two, it starts getting crazy.

So that is update number 1...

Thanks again to everyone.

is your male cat neutered?

Yes, he is. And the female cats are spade.

This sounds very similar to my cats...

I had a female (Xena) for 3 years before I introduced a male kitten (Bobby). Xena practically lived under the bed for 3 months. She was fine when she knew he was locked in but she would hide as soon as she heard him. He just wanted to say hello and play but she would hiss, growl and she has given him some nasty scratches.

I was getting upset at seeing Xena suffer, I tried the feliway diffuser but that didn't work. Then I noticed that when they don't know I am there, she tolerates him fine e.g. very near to each other in the garden and i am looking out the window.

6 months after the introduction things are better but not great. Xena won't go near him and will hide if he is being boisterous. She will hiss if he comes in her personal space but she got her confidence back and follows me around the house again. I always feed them treats together and they take turns in sleeping in my room.

In hindsight, I wouldn't have got the second cat. It has been very stressful and time consuming but it is manageable now. A lot of that is probably due to Bobby getting older and calmer. If you do want to keep Nyx, be prepared for it to take months, not weeks