School Reunions

I recently received an email about my upcoming high school reunion - it's been 5 years.

Personally, I'm not planning on attending; I have nothing remarkable to share with any of my former classmates. I graduated college, yes... earned a degree I consider useless, I have a job I do not enjoy and therefore am trying to go back to school to become a teacher... oh and I have a boyfriend. How can I even share that with those of my classmates that have become/are becoming doctors, nurses, teachers (already) and wives (I went to an all-girls school)?

Not that I have any regrets or shame... I'm perfectly happy with everything in my life (well, except my current job)... but it seems I've done so little sometimes compared to others.

Anyone have any opinions on their own school reunions?

I didn't go to my five either, because like you I felt hadn't "done anything" yet. Couple that with the fact that I don't look back fondly on my highschool experience, I really had no reason to go. My ten was in 2002, and I didn't go to that either. I realized that I didn't miss anyone--yeah, there were people I was kind of curious about, but the people I still cared about from h.s., I was still in touch with. So I'd only be going to "show" people...what I don't know. That I didn't grow up to be a total loser I guess. Anyway, in the end, I didn't think that was a very good reason to go frankly, even though when I didn't go to my five, I said I'd only go when I had something to "show."

What I'm saying is, after a while you (hopefully) get more secure with yourself and comparing yourself to people you went to h.s. with becomes less important. Anyway, if you miss people, want to reconnect with people you lost touch with, then go, and don't worry about how you look next to them. You're fine the way you are--you're doing what's right for you and what makes you happy. Listen, a very wise person on this site (okay Cindy/Kittenkrazy) recently told me that I shouldn't look at other people and say, "Look at how much more accomplished, together, happy, etc., they are compared to me," because I have no way of truly knowing what goes on in those people's lives or their hearts. So like I said, if there's someone you want to see, by all means go. On the other hand, if you couldn't care two wits about these people, then why waste your time?

Sorry if I sound kind of like someone's mom. Before you know it I'll be saying things like, "Kids these days!"

Aw that's good advice. I don't feel the need to compare myself to people and I don't really have any desire to see anyone - my class was really small and I was never really friends with anyone, you know? I do wish I had accomplished more in 5 years but I think in another 5 years I will have done so much more and will hopefully be happier with where I am.

Ariana, five years out of high school is just enough time to finish college and get a kinda start on "real life". I bet most people are in about the same situation as you are, except that while they may just complain about how miserable their choice of careers is, you are DOING something about changing it! That speaks volumes to me, anyway.

OK, that had nothing to do with a reunion, but I can't really help you with that. I don't even know if my high school has done any reunions in the 15 years since I graduated, and I don't think I really care if they have.

i don't think my HS class was organized enough to plan a 5 year reunion. I may go to my 10, but I really don't know that. Like you've said Ari, I am not sure I really care all that much about reconnecting with people. I am still close friends with 3 people from HS and they are really all I care about now.

Wow! It's been 5 years since I've left high school too. My high school only does the 10, 20, 30 year reunions thank goodness. I no longer talk to anyone from high school. It IS sort of funny how a lot of popular/snobby people have went no where so far though!

I just never have interest in them, the people I want to see again never go. I have a friend who is so into going, and I dont' get it...she wasn't very popular, she suffered a lot. She keeps wanting me to go cause her husband doesn't want to go, I mean no way! They are bloody expensive too, they were like $100 a person at the 25th. I told her forget it, if I am going to blow that kind of money I can find better things to do.

Gulp! It'll be 20 years for me in May. Can that be right?!?!
I've gotta do the math. . . 2005 - 1985 = 20!
How is that possible?

I wouldn't go to a school reunion of someone offered to pay me $1,000 to do it!

Originally Posted by Emma's Friend

Gulp! It'll be 20 years for me in May. Can that be right?!?!
I've gotta do the math. . . 2005 - 1985 = 20!
How is that possible?

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I know how you feel. I graduated in 1982 and so had my 20 year reunion almost 3 years ago! I remember when my parents went to their 20 year and I thought they were SO old!

I went to both my 10 and 20 year and I had a blast both times. I'm sure I wasn't as "accomplished" as some there......but I know I was MORE accomplished than some too. But it wasn't about comparing my life to everyone else's.....it was more about getting together and seeing everyone and just having a good time. At my 20 year reunion.....I was amazed at how most of the women looked so much better than the men.

Ari,

I think you should go only if you want to. A 5 or 10 yr reunion is usually different because many people are still in touch with eachother. I really don't think it's about who's done what or has gone on to do this or that with their life. I went to my 10 yr, had a good time, skipped my 20 and now onto my 25th which I am skipping, too. I have one friend, my best friend, who I still stay in touch with but that's it. I guess I just don't care to waste my time visiting with people that I haven't talked to in 25 yrs.

I'll never go to a highschool reunion. Just driving by the place gives me the creeps! Plus there isn't one person I'd enjoy seeing again.


-Brandon

I went to both my 10-year and my 25-year. Ten was a show. It's basically everyone parading spouses and baby pictures. The 25-year was interesting. By then the people who go can be sort of lumped into different categories by their motivation for being there. Some are most definitely trying to grab a piece of the past. That 4 years of high school was the highlight of their lives, and they are still trying to prove how popular they are, or that they can drink you under the table. Next group is the 'near-bys'. They still live right there and have a few friends that do, too. They go because it's something different than what they usually get together and do on a Saturday night. The there are the people who weren't quite ready to wow you at the 10-year, so they are back to talk incessantly about their accomplishments (real or imagined). Finally, there are the nostalgia buffs. I guess I fall into that group. Just curious to see what the heck is going on and have a night to people-watch over a group who you kind of have 'freeze-framed' in your mind because for you, their timeline stops at graduation. It's also a chance, at least it was for me, to see people you grew up with.

So far, my class has only had a 5 year reunion (although our 15 year would have been in 2003). I found it very odd-a lot of people were still trying to fit into their high school roles. I guess I had felt like I had moved on from that whole scene, having my mother pass away while in college and getting ready to move to a whole new city and state for graduate school. But in some ways I really enjoyed it. I hooked up with some friends and acquaintances and blew off the reunion to go out to a local diner. There we caught up and had a really good time. That's the memory I have when I think about my reunion.

Originally Posted by berylayn

i don't think my HS class was organized enough to plan a 5 year reunion. I may go to my 10, but I really don't know that. Like you've said Ari, I am not sure I really care all that much about reconnecting with people. I am still close friends with 3 people from HS and they are really all I care about now.

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awwwww :-)

I'm with Beryl-our class in HS was really disorganized, and most of our class officers who would typically plan these things ended up running for office that year to pad their resumes and I am pretty sure that putting together a 5 year reunion isn't high on their to-do list...and I dont blame them.

I was glad to leave HS, I dont miss it (well, I might miss not having bills....) I dont really have anything to say to much of my class, most of my friends graduated the year before I did anyway and the ones who didn't I have been close with ever since.

Now, should I manage to lose 50 lbs and look the way I did in HS?? they will have to bar the doors to keep me away

I can't wait until my primary school has a reunion. I loved everybody there so catching up will be super neat!

I went to my 10 year reunion and it was bizarre. At first everyone was chatting to each other and at the end everyone gravitated to the people they used to hang with at school. It was like being at school all over again! Not an experience i want to repeat so won't be going to another one. I also find that a lot of people do compare each other and frankly i don't care how much money, how many cars, houses, kids etc everyone has. If i wanted to keep in touch with any of these people i would. Mostly i don't have anything in common with them and never really did. I recently caught up with some old school friends of mine and sadly it was a case of history repeating. I was always told i was too loud, too opinionated and basically not good enough for them. I now have some friends who accept me just the way i am warts and all and would rather spend the time with them than a bunch of people who still think that just because they succeeded at school are the bees knees. Good luck to them!

Pinkdaisy - You have acheived more than you think. Just because you are not a doctor/lawyer/CEO doesn't mean you haven't acheived things. You are in a loving relationship, care about people and animals, work hard, have a job and you are studying to do something you love. All major acheivements as far as i am concerned and mean a hell of a lot more than material attainments.

You couldn't drag me to a HS reunion at gunpoint! Those people bullied me and treated me like crap the whole time, and then they wanted to act like I was their long lost buddy. No!!!!! I was polite about the 5th and the 10th. They got persistent about the 15th, so I called the *itchy little cheerleader turned alcoholic minivan driving soccer mommy and told her to save her @#?!% stamp for my invitation or I would show up and give her a repeat performance of the swirly she got right before Homecoming.

I can't belive it's been 2 years since I graduated! When the time comes for a reunion, I'm much like krazy_kat, you couldn't drag me there at gunpoint, I'd rather have you shoot me. HS wasn't terrible, but I wasn't great either. I had only two true friends, which is fine by me, we're still friends today. They are the only people I care to see and I can visit them till my hearts content. I don't care to see anyone else from my school, besides those that I grew up with since kindergarten, and I can drive down the road and visit half of them! Lol

I have no desire to go back to my HS to put up with the same snobs and jocks as I did for 4 years.