OK - here goes. We're adopting a daughter and she needs prayers.

Originally Posted by valanhb

Laurie, that is just fabulous! That she called on her own, that it's finally really becoming concrete plans for all of you. I'm so happy for you!!!

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I'm pretty darn happy, too - but we're not in the door yet. We are definitely progressing in the right direction, one step at a time, but it has not been easy on or for any of us. Let's keep our fingers crossed that she's able to execute the plan. Gary's getting 2 - 3 hours of sleep a night - and we both know this can't continue, but he has so many problems sleeping to begin with. You can't force a heroin addict to sleep through the night, and we're constantly worried she's going to burn the place down with the cigarette dripping out of her fingers as she nods off..... If we didn't have it on the advice of actually two doctors now, I'd be so insane with worry that we're simply enabling her. But, knock wood, things do seem to be moving forward.

But now we're at the much harder "push comes to shove!" I don't want to minimize the importance of Naomi's making the call and setting the date, but I'm trying to pray for her without getting my expectations set.

Sounds like everything is going in the right direction. I hope Gary starts sleeping better soon and that Naomi keeps on the path of making good decisions. All three of you are in my thoughts in prayers.

Oh I'm so happy after reading your last update!

Laurie - it's so good to hear that things are progressing well. Fingers crossed that Naomi feels brave enough to take that next step. I'll keep sending strength and good wishes for you all as you work your way through this.

Laurie it sounds like you and Gary need a much needed hug ! I wish that some of us were alot closer so that we could hug in person. Remember we are one of your support groups. We are not here just for the story. But because we care
There are so many emotions you and Gary are going to go through like

Just think of us as your beerpals. even though I dont drink beer.
Now a good stiff Mudslide and I'm your gal.
You are in my prayers tonight!!!
I just want you to feel (PEACE) for tonight!!!!!

So glad about the call Laurie. We are with you. Hang in there.

so happy for you!!!! I am truly ecstatic to hear she made the call,,that just means she took one more small step in the right direction of a very long hard journey. Hang in there,,and tell Gary to get some sleep. It wont do any good to be sleeping in therapy!!!
-stevie

Still thinking of you all, hope everything is still going well.

Here's hoping that Naomi actually went to detox today and that you and Gary can get some sleep and recover a bit. Keep us updated. Hugs and prayers.

Well, I'm not sure I'd be able to swear that the past week hasn't been a dream.

Here goes.

She'd scheduled to go in last Thursday. We showed up, and one of the counselors we'd met with (Chris) said that he'd meditated on the situation, and he felt very strongly that Naomi "needed" to go to their facility in Florida, not just detox up here. He felt she should make the journey herself - meaning get down there on her own to detox THERE, and then "relocate" there for at least several months. Well, this is a "loop" we were NOT planning on. We wanted to speak to the people in Florida, and we set up a call. So here we go again - just another false "start" that wasn't Naomi's fault. Poor thing, it is really getting frustrating.

But of course, everything happens for a reason.

In the meantime, she remembered she'd been arrested in NY for possession and had a court date on Feb 2! So we were in a scramble to get the information on that, and we couldn't leave for FL even if she wanted to, because she had to appear in court. She went to court with Gary yesterday, and they managed to get the felony (she had 2 grams of heroin on her, and anything over 1 is a felony) dropped to a misdemeanor, and she must voluntarily go into detox within the next 30 days and serve one day of community service in NY, and the whole thing will then be expunged from her record. If she doesn't do this, the original charge is reinstated, and she'll have to go back to court for sentencing. We have no idea what kind of jail time she'd get, but she would have to go to jail, and it would be on her record as a felony.

So... in the meantime, we've talked to the people down in Florida, and we're all really getting the feeling that this is some kind of cult-like thing. Now Naomi's freaking out about what to do, because she's allergic to the drug they use in most programs to bring people down during detox, we originally really liked this detox potential, and now it's coming unglued.

Fortunately, I found this place called the Opiate Detoxification Institute, and it's a "rapid detox" program - designed, basically, for rich people like executives, sports people and movie stars. They put the addict on a morphine drip for 24 hours (in a hospital), then the person goes under general anesthesia while they administer some kind of opiate blocker/inhibitor that "washes" the heroin out of the brain and replaces it with an endorphine-like substance (part of the problem with opiate withdrawal is that the brain no longer produces endorphins on its own). This takes about an hour, and then the addict remains in the hospital for another 24 hours for observation. They'll feel like they have the flu for about two days (as the liver produces mass amounts of enzymes to "wash" the heroin out of the system), then they should be fine. They're under the care of both the doctor and a program psychiatrist for 3 to 6 months, and they're given medication for anxiety and sleep. Apparently getting sleep for heroin addicts who just detoxed is a real problem. Naomi is really not interested in this whole program because it is so drug oriented - but it's quick, there's no withdrawal symptoms, and she does have serious anxiety problems and has detoxed before and says sleep is a real problem afterwards. So Gary and I are interested in this for her, and now that she's really questioning this Florida program - and she needs to detox within 30 days or she goes to jail, I think she may do it. We've discussed with her that even though it's so "western" in it's style, and so drug dependent - which we're not totally into either - once she's detoxed, THEN she can concentrate on holistic healing. We've found a meditation class she's interested in that starts in March, Tai Chi that we all want to do that starts in April, we've found a psychiatrist that is ALSO an acupuncturist (is that a word?)... unfortunately, she'll miss Spring semester, because those classes start next week. But Penguin Publishing is in our building at work, and we've already talked to one of the execs there, and she's welcome to join (for free) one of their writing training classes. So apart from exercise and weekend travel, there's lots for her to do, and we're hoping that working on building structure and a schedule will help her find the courage to just go do this, western drug-heavy or not.

We've got an appointment to go meet the doctors tomorrow at this rapid detox to see if physically she even qualifies for the program.

But she's on an emotional roller-coaster right now, and although she's really cut down on the amount of heroin she shoots daily, she's really in an internal battle over her desire to quit versus her desire to shoot. Part of the problem is that she IS so sensitive to everything. She's obsessed with watching the news, and the orphans of the tsunami are a real focus for her right now. She likely really does need treatment for what would probably be clinically diagnosed as manic depression - but she's got to get clean before anyone can really tell what's up in her head.

So... we've had a few false starts, but we really expected those. We just thought they'd be false starts from Naomi, not the detox people! What a strange situation. Anyway, we're working on getting back to work, which with someone who sometimes is so sensitive to other people's needs and who at other times is so self-centered, it's really difficult. We know it's the heroin, but that's a fact of life we have to live with right now, and boy does it make scheduling just about anything really difficult.

I've delayed taking my exams for work, and they're being really understanding about it. We'd been hoping we'd already be in rehab - but now she's got the additional incentive of facing jail time if she doesn't find a detox solution she's willing and able to do. Actually, I should give her more credit than it just sounded like. She actually didn't balk about going Thursday, and we all thought she was going in for detox - and she was ready before, when we were waiting for beds at Sunrise or Carrier - but her allergy to Saboxone was also a problem.

And finally... the one other thing I like about this rapid detox program is that they provide follow up for 3 to six months, depending upon the needs of the addict. She has to see a doctor and a psychiatrist from the program at least weekly, and conference calls whenever she wants. Also, they administer a drug called... naltrone? I don't remember - something like that. It's an opiate antagonist - meaning - IF she gives in to the temptation to shoot up, she won't get high from it. So while the program may make it too quick, too easy (no withdrawal symptoms, etc.) - hopefully the follow-up combined with a "structured life" and no ability to get high from heroin will provide Naomi all the incentives she needs to kick this addiction for good.

And the BEST thing about this rapid detox program is that if we see them Friday and she wants to do it, they can start her treatment Monday. It's not an issue of having beds available or a wait-list or anything.

So I have no idea what will happen - I just know that Naomi hasn't been dragging her feet on this, and now there's an additional incentive to get detoxed.

Wow - it's all so complicated, but it really doesn't sound as if there's much of a choice if she has to stay in NY. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that things go well tomorrow, and that this program will help her.

WOW, Laurie!! What a rollercoaster! What a bizarre turn of events with that counsellor! Sounds as if this rapid detox might be just the ticket, though. I hope it works out, so Naomi can get on with this phase, instead of being jerked around some more by circumstances. Thinking of you all.

It's "out of the frying pan" Always, isnt' it?

Well I'm GLAd tat the cult thing got suspected before she joined.. but it's unfortunate that its' a cult.
I hope things go well with the rapid detox :/ and I'm sure once she's off the heroin, she'll be able to do the more eastern holistic healing and detox (because to a point it is still detox.) Is there a japanese or chinese garden in your area? Maybe if there is, they soemtimes have classes on eastern style watercolor which is an art and a meditation at the same time. it's quite interesting.

Well, I am glad that she still is willing, I just hope everything starts working itself out reallly soon, before the 30 days are up. The rapid detox sounds like it may help though. I hope she isn't allergic to morphine. (if that is where she goes) still thinking of you all, and thankyou for the update!

*waiting impatiently - lol* its friday!!! Did you go to talk to the detox place?? I really hope that Naomi decides to do this. It sounds like a really good plan! I'm glad to see that she really wants the help too! Get better so you can come talk to us!!! (im hooked on this thread - Ive been checking for updates everyday! lol)

Laurie, I am keeping you, Gary and especially Naomi in my prayers. I really hope that everything works out for the best. You know the saying, when God closes one door.....

OK! We met with the detox people - she weighs enough and her heart is fine (she'd had an EKG at the first Doc appt we had for her - we had a copy of her file - with her permission - transferred), and more importantly, her liver functions are fine.

So - we went back today for the cocaine test (negative), and the official appointment with the Doctor. She had to have a psych profile done, and fill out a LOT of paperwork. The Doc wrote a prescription for a pill version of morphine and a prescription for Xanax (for anxiety) - so no more shooting. IF there is a cancellation for the scheduled Thursday detox (that person also has a cocaine problem, so they're not sure she'll be able to keep her Wed check-in), then Naomi checks in for detox Wednesday. If not, she checks in Sunday for detox. She was in a terrible mood all morning (obviously anxious about this appointment), but we made it, and she completed everything - and afterwards was in a great mood! They made it VERY clear to her that this is the easy part - and the hard part starts when she comes home. Doc put it very bluntly - you've been experiencing life through rose-colored glasses, so to speak. Without the heroin, you won't have that "safety net" anymore, and life can really suck. It's up to you.

She was all depressed last night about all the horrible things that go on in the world. I said I think a major difference between her and me at her age (apart from the drugs) is that I didn't get depressed about the environment, the injustices, the political problems, etc. in the world - I got mad. And anger is a great motivator, but depression is more like when problems become or seem overwhelming, and depression often serves to incapacitate you, not motivate you. After her psych profile, we were told she's likely bipolar, manic depressive, and probably has an anxiety problem. As the nurse put it "Honey, you've got a lot of problems, and after detox, you've got a lot of work ahead of you." Of course, they believe that all of these problems are treatable with medication in conjunction with therapy, all of which will have to be closely monitored after detox. They REALLY recommend she participate in an in-patient rehab program, preferably for three months, but she really isn't interested in doing this. I did find a holistic rehab program that has a lot of different options (for in-patient programs and length of programs) - but it's located in North Miami Beach - which I just don't understand. That's almost the drug capital of the US! I guess that's where the demand would be - but it must make relapsing so easy. We're not thrilled about the idea of sending her there.

Anyway, we're just taking it one day at a time. We do have yoga, tai-chi, meditation, acupuncture, group therapy and individual therapy set up for when detox is done. Unfortunately classes for the Spring semester started this week, so any (esp. creative writing) of that is out right now. We've decided to forego Canyon Ranch, but at the encouragement of these detox people, we are going to go on vacation for 10 days 3 - 5 days after detox. For vacation we've decided to do a U.S. History theme - head to D.C., meander through VA and south - as we head to Naples, FL for some time at the beach, so we can all get exercise walking in the sand, some sun - and she can have as much time as she wants alone to reflect and write. As Doc put it - that sounds PERFECT! There are no drugs in Naples! And while I don't believe that's true, I do believe that it's principally a retirement area, and drugs would be a LOT harder to find that anywhere else in FL.

Tonight I told her I was really proud of her today - and she said "I know. I am too."

I just wanted to thank you all again for your thoughts and hopes for her and everything working out. It's been a real roller coaster, though we never expected less. And I really believe she's going to go through with the detox. THEN the hard part begins!!!!!

Thank you for all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think I won't try to find words just now

I am so glad that things seems to be moving along positively! Hopefully se can get in on Wednesday and not have to wait until Sunday.

Sending good vibes your way!