FIP took my baby and I am devastated

My little Baba was fine a month ago. She was a little skinny but that is all. I noticed she was tired and had a fever so to the vet she went. They thought she had pyometra and after an emergency spay they found she had FIP. I didn't want to believe it. She got worse and then better. Then within 2 weeks the disease intensified, and she developed fluid in her belly. We had her put down wednesday 6/8 I finally accepted her misery and doom and we put her to sleep, crying and holding her in our lap. She was only 7 months old. She was so sweet, so loving. Every night I expect her to jump on the bed and yell at us demanding that my bf lay on his back so she could curl up on his chest and suckle his shirt (she was part siamese). I picture her face so fresh, I expect to see it when I turn my head.

A month ago I didn't know FIP existed and today my Baba is gone forever because of it. I cry every day. She was one of a kind, adorable, personable and perfectly mannered. I am CRUSHED. Even more so crushed that FIP took the best cat I have ever owned, I loved her so much.

My heart aches for you.  FIP took my little Lurch, and then over the next two years it took 7 more of the kittens in this rescue.  Until now, there hasbeen no cure, but one has just been discovered, in a lab.  It will probably be a couple of years before it gets out and available to all, and until it does, there is nothing we can do to save them.  You gave her your heart, and she will never leave it, as Lurch will never leave mine.  I'm so very sorry that FIP took your beautiful little girl.

I'm sorry for you lost...

She was your soulmate, it leaves such a large void in our lives when they have to go. You did all you could and there was no way you could let the suffering go on from something that was could not be cured. She was a beautiful little being, her face was expressive, and being part Siamese I'm sure she was personable and very talkative. Why these things have to happen to one so loved and wanted is beyond comprehension, but she is at peace now, no more pain and fear. You gave her 7 months of love and happiness, that is all she ever wanted, She would never want you to be so sad, try to celebrate having her in your life. Even though the pain is great from losing her, it is still better then to have never had her in your life at all, she brought so much into it. Bless you for hurting so bad from loving so much, I'll pray for you both, as I'm sure many will when they learn of your sweet little girl......... RIP dear Baba, you will be forever missed so very much and held so dearly forevermore in a loving heart!

Thank you for your kind words. Your kindness really does help heal my heart. Those I know personally are either not a cat person or don't see pets as true family. My kitten was a family member to me, not just a pet. So it's hard to grieve when those around me cannot understand or relate to the sadness I feel for my Baba. It comforts me to hear from those who feel the same.

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Baba was adorable. I know that it hurts really bad right now but it will get better. What you did was the ultimate act of compassion and friendship. Baba is no longer ill. She will never be in pain again. She is over at the bridge whole and well again and she is being cared for with tenderness and love. She will never forget you. You gave her a home and because of you she knew unconditional love and friendship. Even though the time you spent with her was too short (it always is), you formed a bond with her that will last forever. She will watch over you and when the time is right, you will be reunited with her and your friendship will pick right back up again as if time had stood still. Please do not listen to anyone who tells you that she was "just a cat" or anything like that. She was (and always will be) your family member and you will always be hers. You are among like minded people here. Please feel free to talk about her all you like and post as many pictures as you care to. We understand. 

I hate FIP it has taken too many of our beautiful friends. Baba was such a beautiful kitty. I am so sorry for your loss

I'm so sorry that your Baba left you.  It really is a horrible disease and I so wish you had not lost her so young.  She was so pretty and sounds like she was a very special girl, too.  My heart goes out to you as you grieve. 

TurkishVanMama said:

 
Thank you for your kind words. Your kindness really does help heal my heart. Those I know personally are either not a cat person or don't see pets as true family. My kitten was a family member to me, not just a pet. So it's hard to grieve when those around me cannot understand or relate to the sadness I feel for my Baba. It comforts me to hear from those who feel the same.

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You will heal in time and Baba will help you from the bridge. I hope that you will stick around so we can be there to help you heal too. 

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hate FIP   I am sorry you lost your best friend. I hope you stick around and share more of her when you are able to. I am so sorry again for your loss. She is a very pretty girl. May she run free at the Bridge.

Baba was gorgeous.  I am very sorry for your loss.  My prayers are with you.  

Thank you so much for the support everyone. Its been a sad week even sadder when I realized my other cat Cola has been looking for Baba everyday. Today she walked up to Baba's old bed and sat in front of it and wailed out the saddest cries I've ever heard from her. She is rarely a talkative cat so it was quite upsetting to see her crying and wailing on and off for the next hour. I saw a picture of them cuddling and I was crying all over again today. My bf had a day off today and it was the first day off for him without me home or Baba home, and cried as well and he never cries.

It's been especially  hard dealing with the depression and emotional distress from it all once I returned to work. Many of my coworkers look at me like I'm over reacting and being stupid  and say things like "Seriously It's just a cat!" And you can just tell they don't approve of how hard this has affected me.

They think I should be fine and I should be over it and follow up with "Ugh I hate cats". Everyone has been very insensitive. No one acts as if you should be grieving. It's upsetting and angering and I can't help but feel resentment while at the same time knowing I can't even mention my loss or vent my feelings because you can just see people think "Oh god here we go again". I don't understand how people can be so detached and cold. 

8 hours a day I am screaming inside, crying inside, and no one understands why I am not being myself nor cares because "it's just a cat".

"It's just a cat."  That's like telling a woman who has miscarried that "It wasn't a baby yet."  Love is love, and those who don't understand it are just too immature to know.  Life will teach them love and loss in time.  Anyone who thinks anything non-human doesn't take your heart is not worth bothering with.  You should yell at them HEY, SHE (not it)was MY cat and I LOVED her and even if you don't understand that, you can at least pretend to have some compassion.  And then burst into tears and storm off.  If nothing else, it might shock them into a little awareness.  They must have been kids who grew up without pets.

I am sorry that many of your co-workers are so ignorant. It is safe to say that everyone on this site knows how painful it can be to lose a loved pet. 

People who say "It is just a cat" are the ones who are missing the point, not you.  They have clearly never known the love that can exist between humans and animals and that is their loss.  I'm sorry you've had to hear this kind of nonsense.  It's very hurtful and inevitably someone says something like this.  Everyone here understands that Baba was a precious being and your dear friend, to be treasured in your heart forever.  Those other people?  Pfffft.  One can only hope that one day, they will discover what they are missing.  Cats do have a way of coming along and stealing hearts. 

What a beautiful girl she was, and it's horrible that she was yet another victim of FIP, something all cat owners dread. I'm very sorry for your loss. RIP, little one.

Love is Love The End! It doesn't matter what species died if you love that person, animal, bird, then the pain of losing them is no less. Grrr, I am glad you can come here because we understand the gaping hole it leaves when your soul mate leaves you. I am so sorry for your loss but she will know how much you truly loved her as you know how much she loved you. My mum lost a Siamese kitten 9 months old and she was devastated, it took her years to recover and I would never ever had said, it was just a cat because she loved him with her heart and soul. You deserve to grieve and you need to grieve, you need to cry to. Rise above them because they'll never know the love you shared or even ever experience it. We all understand, every single one of us on this site and my heart truly breaks for you. RIP little Baba, you'll be together again one day.

I am so sorry I lost a kitty to FIP too and it broke me. I was physically sick and anguished for weeks. Now I am glad I had time with him and I have another kitty in my life who I love dearly. I am sorry for your loss. You are not alone. What is really strange is I called my Kitty Baba too. his name was Harvey but Baba was his nickname.

May they be playing together in kitty heaven. Our 2 Baba's.

HUGS>

Thank you everyone for your kind words, every post brought a smile to my face and really touched my heart. Every single person who has posted has really helped me heal internally, and I wanted you all to know just how important and deeply your words have impacted me. Sometimes in my lows, I re-read these posts to remind me I am not alone in my grieving.

I got 2 pure breed Siamese kittens since then, and they seem very healthy. They have brought so much joy in my life, each with such unique personalities!

But would you believe today I cried over Baba? I watched her videos which I couldn't do for the last month because it broke me down so hard. I STILL miss her and the pain in my heart is still very much there. I don't know if I thought I would forget her pain through the love and joy my new fur babies have brought me, because I feel they truly are a blessing in my life right now.

But I have realized a shocking revelation: I will always miss Baba.

Of course you will. She was unique, and irreplaceable. We learn to place that love, those feelings we have, in a special, protected place in our lives and our hearts and eventually allow ourselves to build a new love in that gaping hole in our hearts. The scar will remain there forever, but we soothe our soul with love with the new love that we feel for those who occupy our homes and our hearts once again. In this way we honor the legacy of love that was entrusted to us and build a new order in our lives that encompasses all, the past and the present. We are all truly blessed for knowing that wonderful love at all!