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Booger (long)

post #1 of 23
Thread Starter 
Dear Booger's newest Mom:

I'm Laurie, and my hubby and I were Booger's second guardians. We thought Booger was a feral - just one of the many forgotten barn cats around here. But that didn't turn out to be the case. She had belonged to someone when she was a kitten, and she lived with them long enough to have a "very expensive" spay. But when we first "met" Booger, there was no way to tell she had been loved once. She was all skin and bones, with matted hair and a wild streak.

Gary and I dated in high school in the suburbs of Chicago in 1979 - 1981 when I left for college and he left for the army. We lost touch with each other until 1993 when he called my parents to track me down. I'd become a professional money manager and he had become the youngest Regional Manager of a Fortune 50 company ever (at age 30). We were both burnt out. He was living in Seattle - I was in New York. After several months of getting reacquainted on the phone, I took some much-needed time off to fly out to visit him. We got engaged. :-)

He packed up his few belongings and drove out to NY. We both quit our jobs, bought an RV and gave up the lease to the apartment. Anything that didn't fit was sold or given away. We headed up the Alaska Highway, and got married at mile 0 (up in Dawson Creek, British Columbia). We stayed in touch with my Wall Street buddies, who asked us to visit companies for them along the way. We turned it into a business and became partners conducting research for professional money managers. We called ourselves "Road Research." I am a Chartered Financial Analyst, and member of the Association of Investment Management & Research and the New York Society of Security Analysts.

We hooked up with a brokerage firm that needed research product, we became employees and expanded our distribution. But we continued our unique style of working. Technology has come a long way since we began! It's easy to work from the road now - but back then, it took quite a bit of creativity (and investment). Our current firm is New York based, and now I'm a Senior Vice President and Gary is the Chief Investment Officer.

The point of this discussion of our background is to let you know how we wound up living in an RV and staying in the campgrounds across America.

We were in the New York area when September 11 happened, and we'd already met Boog. But after September 11, everything changed. We needed to stay close to New York, where our firm (our offices) and most of our customers are located. We decided to stay in the RV: we were in a lovely RV resort in the farming community of northern New Jersey on the PA border. We're still here, but getting ready to hit the road again. We work from home most of the time, but we have easy access to NY if we need it.

RV parks are notorious for stray and feral cats. I never really noticed them before. I grew up with a dog, but certainly didn't have anything against cats (except I'm allergic to them). I just never really knew any. Gary, on the other hand, hated cats. They were pests on his army base, and he had an on-going battle with one cat that kept gaining access to his home.

So when that ugly, dirty, scraggly thing kept raiding the garbage can (for whatever reason the rules of this park are that we're not allowed to use covered garbage cans...although there are raccoons, bear, foxes lots of feral cats and the two dogs of the park owners. I can't imagine what their thinking is!), Gary just got madder and madder. Each morning we'd leave our home - and garbage would be scattered everywhere. Of course there were lots of cats - but we just kept seeing one of them.

One evening we pulled in - and were greeted with strewn garbage yet again. That one stray approached us (not close!!!!) meowing. Gary leaned down to pick up a rock. What made him think I wouldn't have a problem with that I can't imagine. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" So instead of chucking the rock at that thing that must be a cat, Gary meowed at her. She meowed back. He thought that was kind of cute. He softened - and asked, in a resigned voice - "OK. Why don't you go grab some cheese?" I was back out in a flash. That was when the cheese-tossing started.

Cheese-tossing became a regular part of each day. This straggly cat would approach us - but only come so far. We tossed cheese closer and closer, and she moved closer with it over time. We put out tuna and canned chicken for her. Carefully - watchfully, she'd eat. As we tossed the cheese closer and closer, sometimes she'd run up to grab it and run further away with it. Of course, we didn't know then whether or not that cat was a "he" or a "she," so we christened her with an androgynous name. ;-)

She finally got close enough for us to touch her. And she didn't run away. It took us a little over a month to get to this point. The poor thing was so dirty and straggly, even Gary felt sorry for her. And they'd had many "conversations" by now, so although he wouldn't admit it, there was a soft spot in his heart for Boog. Once we could regularly pet her, and she trusted us enough to interact with her, Gary grabbed a brush and went to work on her. A beautiful can emerged from under all those mats. She came to love being brushed, and I'm ashamed to admit it now, but we bought a flea collar for her. We groomed out what we could. I am just so thankful she had no negative reaction to the flea collar. Boog is many times blessed, and we got lucky. Gary was proud of "his" handiwork - a beautiful, flea-tick-and lice-free cat. :-) Boog had completed her first rescue. She'd rescued Gary from a cat-hating fate.

At some point along the way I suggested we start feeding her regularly (not that we weren't already! I just though cat food might be healthier than tuna, canned chicken and cheese). I find it ironic looking back that we're professionally analysts and we conduct research for a living - but it didn't occur to me to do any research on cats at the time. It never dawned on me that they would become such a part of our lives. Booger, at the time, seemed like a temporary thing. Gary hesitated - and I added - if there are mice around here, we won't have a problem with them come Winter. He agreed. We bought cat food (both wet and dry) and started feeding her regularly and putting out fresh water for her.

I'll never forget that first Fall afternoon she stayed on my lap for a few minutes. I sat down on the bench to feed her. When she was done eating, I started in on our daily brush fest. We'd never tried picking her up. I picked her up and put her on my lap after a few brushes. She tensed up, but I kept brushing. That calmed her fears, and I kept going. She started purring. After a few more brushes, she'd had enough and hopped down. She headed out on patrol, as she always did - though she was starting to spend more and more of her time sunning herself in our yard. One of her favorite spots was the concrete of the fire pit (which we rarely used).

The next day, I did the same thing. This time she stayed a little longer. The day after that? I sat down before putting her bowl of food down, and she hopped up in my lap. She wanted to be loved before she ate her food! I was stunned - and - what can I say? Honored! I really felt like I'd accomplished something. Gary couldn't believe it. My lap became one of her favorite places. I quickly learned I needed to have some padding in-between her and me. She had SHARP claws, and she kneads! But I barely noticed the pain from her kneading at first. She was so happy, and that was all that mattered.

Booger was now a part of our lives. When she wanted us or food, she'd hop up on our step and meow. We have two metal steps up into the RV. "Pa-dump." Boog's here! She didn't want in (at first), but she wanted to be with us. We could pick her up and love on her, she'd hang out on our laps - even Gary had come to love her. And she wasn't a bag of bones anymore. She brought us presents of mice - sometimes half eaten. We never did anything but thank her and disappear with them. There were a few days we didn't hear her "Pa-dump." She didn't like walking in the rain. I hated days she didn't visit and constantly worried about her.

"Pa-dump." BOOG'S BACK!!!!!!

Then the snow started. One evening she turned up on the doorstep meowing - and Gary said "I'm not heading out in that cold!" He scooped her up and set her down inside. She didn't freak and run to hide - but she was not happy at first. She just hunkered down on the bottom step near the door looking unhappy. She didn't mind so much once the bowl of food appeared. Then the brush appeared - and she relaxed enough to purr. We let her out.

This continued for a few days - and then I picked her up and put her on my lap. She was getting used to the inside noises now. The microwave, the printer, the TV. Little by little she overcame her fear. And she LOVED being on our laps, being loved on. She started coming earlier and leaving later. We bought her a cat bed, which we kept near the door. She immediately knew it was hers! She usually showed up around 4:00 and would want to leave by 2:00am - 4:00am. We always let her in when she wanted in, and we always let her out when she wanted out.

I don't know why we waited until January - but she'd been gaining weight, was (externally) parasite free - wasn't sick - and was an independent girl. I guess we were afraid that if we took her to the vet she'd get mad and not come back. Finally we decided that if we didn't want kittens come Spring, we'd better get going. It was January (2002) and we made an appointment to go.

That was when we learned our girl was a Maine Coon or Maine Coon Mix. They thought she was a pure bred - which made the chances of her being spayed already pretty high. They shaved her belly - and there was a scar. But it was so jagged and horrible looking, they were pretty sure it was from an accident or a fight. They went ahead with the surgery. It turns out she was spayed. And as they put it - someone spent a lot of money on that cat. She'd had her entire uterus and ovaries removed. Apparently this is more expensive than traditional spay surgeries, but according to the vet, it ensures she won't become a fat, lazy cat. That she was not!!!!! We dewormed her and had her vaccinated.

Booger's story was unfolding.

Where we live, no pets are allowed. No cats, not even inside only. It looked as if someone had stayed in the RV park with their pet - which had recently been spayed. Recently enough to still have her stitches, or to have recently had them out. The kitty must have escaped - and because they weren't allowed to have pets, they must not have notified the park owners. It appears she escaped shortly after being spayed. It would explain the ugly scar. The vet estimated that Booger was about 18 months old when we brought her in in January. So the poor babe must have survived her first Winter outside on her own - after escaping after having been spayed that summer or fall while her family came through this RV park. I feel terrible - she is such a wonderful kitty and they really missed a wonderful pet.

...But I was so afraid she'd run away when we let her out after having her spayed. And though she wasn't technically spayed by our vet, it was just as if she had been. We asked them to use dissolving stitches just in case she didn't come back. We felt it was necessary, and her never returning was a risk we had to take. But Boog was wonderful, as always. She didn't like the crate, but she never fussed. We brought her home, and opened the crate inside. We gave her a little bit of her favorite treat - Whiskas kitty milk. She enjoyed her treat and crawled into bed. She spent the longest time she ever stayed. She must have had to go to the bathroom something fierce - but she spent almost 24 hours here. Then she wanted some loving, a bit of food, and then she wanted out. I waited all the next day for her "pa-dump."

And there it was! "Pa-dump." BOOG'S BACK!!!!!!

Booger hated the snow. She would usually turn up at the beginning of a snow storm, and she'd stay until it was over. She would wait for us to shovel a walkway out to the road before she disappeared on patrol. But if she didn't show up before or at the beginning of a storm, she wasn't coming until it was over. There are many barns around here, and we know that Boog had "homes" in at least two of them. But to get here she had to cross several fields - which meant walking through the snow. YUCK - poor Boog hated it! Thankfully that Winter wasn't such a bad one.

But the Spring! Spring was different. There's a field out in front of our home. We enjoy flying kites, and Boog would join us in the field - chasing the tail of the kite as it took off or as it waved in the wind after crash landing. We'd pack up and run home - Boog chasing us. We'd go for evening walks, and she'd either run ahead - or let us walk on and run to catch up. She'd follow us home, confident she'd receive all the love (and food or treats) she wanted. She'd knead and purr and drool until it was time for us to head to bed. Boog stayed or went - it was up to her.

Boog even came to enjoy being held. Gary started it - with a strange maneuver she oddly seemed so comfortable with. He'd hold her up away from his body - her chest on his hand, her body draped over his bent elbow. He'd hold her up high like that - and she'd always purr. Perhaps she liked the view?

Spring meant no more snow. But Spring also meant kittens, although we didn't know that yet. We enjoyed and cherished our time with Booger, though as the days grew longer, so did her wanderlust. She always came by (unless it was raining, and she didn't get here before the storm). But she only wanted to sleep inside occasionally, and we understood. She loves us - but she's an independent girl. A true survivor who had gotten in touch with her feral genes. We enjoyed with her what time she would share. Absorbed in work outside, it was wonderful to feel her rubbing up against our legs. Or, more often, at work inside, we'd jump at her "pa-dump." She came by almost every day for a bite to eat and a bit'o love. Then she'd head out on patrol - and return to sun herself for the afternoon. Another round of patrol - and "pa-dump" - back for dinner and pets, which, in the evenings, were regularly inside now.

But then the kittens appeared. A grey tabby with a black nose. Two tuxedo kitties - one with black front legs and one with white front legs. A brown/orange tabby. A HUGE (even as a kitten he was twice as large as the others) ginger-orange kitty with very light tabby markings. They were so cute! Boog didn't mind sharing the yard at first. We discovered they were born in and lived with their mom in a groundhog hole up in the woods behind the RV. We started feeding them up there - but apparently the woods behind the RV and the back part of the yard were a fun place to learn and play. We didn't let the kitties detract from our time with Boog. But the rowdier they got, the less time she spent in the yard.

I finally decided I'd better start learning something about cats and what to do. I got on line and found a wonderful place called The Cat Site. I visited the feral colonies forum and started getting advice. ( We started working on socializing the kittens - little by little sitting out with them, moving closer and closer. Mommie always kept a watchful eye, but little by little the kitties "came around." Lazlo first ("black nose"), Sheldon next ("black legs"). Spooky ("the little one"), Julius ("the big one") and Tuxedo ("white legs" - the mean one) were (very!) different stories. (You can read Lazlo and Sheldon's story here: I now have a website dedicated to rescue, rescue stories, feral cats and low-cost spay/neuter resources,

But the long and short of it is Lazlo came in right after July 4th that summer. Sheldon followed less than a week later. We live in a VERY small home - and Booger and the new crew did not get along. We did not have the space to socialize the three of them, and Boog had no interest. She either had to come in full time or we had to do something. I didn't mention that one of the other reasons we stuck around instead of hitting the road in the Spring was because Gary had a tumor removed from his head (it was diagnosed that October (2001)). He then required two stomach surgeries (March and April, 2002), and then need back surgeries (August and September, 2002). We expected we'd be hitting the road again in the Spring of 2003. I was now a regular at The Cat Site forums, and I talked through my dilemma with understanding and sympathetic people. We made the TERRIFICALLY HARD decision to find Booger a home. A member of TCS had the log-on name of MaineCoonRescue, and that's where I went.

I contacted them in ... July? August? I don't remember exactly when. It broke my heart to make the decision - but Gary and I saw no other way than to find Booger a new home. What were we going to do when we left this park? Put her in a crate while we traveled and release her when we arrived? Sometimes we're destination oriented and spend just one night in an RV park. What if she didn't come back the next morning? No. Booger needed and deserved a loving, permanent home. That we couldn't provide that to her, that we couldn't meet that need was something I struggled with daily for months. "Pa-dump." How could I not have that in my life?

I worked with a Maine Coon Rescue Coordinator for months to find Booger the perfect home. In the meantime, we rescued several more kittens. We placed Munchkin, Magic, Spooky and Julius in new homes. We'd started putting food out for cats, period, and Gary trapped and we had spayed or neutered 20 cats (in addition to the 8 kittens when they were of age) and were now managing a feral colony. I use three different kinds of allergy medication. Booger never integrated into the feral colony, and that convinced us we were doing the right thing in trying to find her a home. I rejected countless families/people that wanted Booger. Then XXXXXX came along. We talked for two months - via e-mail and on the phone. XXXXXX was so enthusiastic, seemed wonderful, and understood we wanted Boog to remain "in our lives," so to speak. She promised updates, and we promised to provide her with any resources she would ever need for Booger. If Booger was sick and she needed money, we made it clear we would be there for her. And if things didn't work out XXXXXX and Booger, she said she'd let us help to rehome her. I have a friend that rescues kitties that lives about two hours from her, and that was one of the reasons I felt comfortable sending Booger across the country.

I'll never forget that last night. We'd decided to take Boog to the vet, where she'd spend the night. A friend of XXXXXXX's was flying from DC to Portland and was taking Booger with her. She needed her health certificate and vaccination records. Boog needed to see the vet in order to get the health certificate, and she needed to spend the night inside to ensure she'd be there in the morning when we were to drive her to meet XXXXXXX's friend in Philadelphia.

Of course, that night was the worst storm of the Winter. We had worse snow storms later in the season - but nothing matched that day Gary drove to Philadelphia. It was a terrible, terrible ice-storm, and the driving conditions were so dangerous. The Vet closes at 8:00 - and at 7:00, it had been sleeting/icing/snowing for some time, and no "pa-dump." Finally, we got in the car and drove around. We drove to each barn on the property. We drove up and down the road, all through the park - everywhere we thought she could possibly have gone. I had the window open, and I leaned out - wind whipping, ice stinging my face. Calling and calling and calling. BOOGER! BOOGER! BOOGER! I was in tears. I didn't want her to go, I didn't want her to miss this opportunity. I didn't want her to show up. I was afraid she wouldn't show up.

8:00. No Booger. I was inconsolable. 8:05 - "Pa-dump!" I was immediately on the phone. The vet agreed to wait. I knew I'd never be seeing Booger again. I couldn't face going the next day, and one of us needed to man the phones for work. I said my good-byes, hugged my Booger girl and watched as Gary bundled Booger in the crate and took off. He braved the slippery, windy roads to get her to the vet. What should have been a 15 - 20 minute trip took almost an hour. The vet waited. Boog got her papers and a place for the night.

The next morning Gary was at the vet's when they opened. The trip to Philly should have taken 2 1/2 - 3 1/2 hours (depending upon traffic). It was the worst ice-storm of the season. We were under a severe weather warning, and it was happening. The roads were completely iced. Road signs had snow covering them. He missed an exit, got lost, and took probably five hours to get to his destination. Gary broke down and cried as he said his good-byes to Booger.

And she was gone.

No more "pa-dump."

I still miss her every day.

XXXXXXX assured us she arrived safe and sound. She gave us an update two weeks later. And that was it. Finally, in July, I wrote to MCR to see if they could help find out how Booger was doing.

Due to personal tragedies of the people involved, we only found out a few days ago that Booger was safe and sound. I am so sorry for whatever has happened to XXXXXXX in her life - she seemed to be a wonderful, bubbly person, and I hope she finds that place in herself again. But I'm also sorry she didn't call to ask for our help - at least in rehoming Booger. I have been assured that Booger is in a wonderful, loving home. I know she deserves it. Gary and I just didn't ever want Booger to leave our lives completely. Booger was, to us, a very special cat. We didn't rescue her - she rescued us from our ignorance of the stray and feral cat problem. She rescued Gary from a cat-hating fate. She is directly responsible for the rescue of many cats - a number of them listed below. Booger's story is also on my rescue site: Our "Rescue" Rescued Us! We've also become so involved in the plight of feral cats that I (and friends) created another website, Gary is now known as "The Cat Man of Blairstown," (where we live here in NJ), and we help others trap ferals, and we have a small fund that helps to pay for spay/neuter for those that can't afford it. When strays or homeless kittens are dropped off at the vet, they contact us. When necessary, we foster, socialize and then adopt them out. Since one adoption that went badly (Spooky and Julius), we now use a stringent adoption agreement. Spooky now lives with us - Julius was successfully rehomed. We regularly see Julius, Thanksgiving and Magic, and we receive regular updates on Munchkin (now Annie) and MaeMae. The black kitty was named Snougie by his new mom, and he recently went to his new home.

I really looked forward to the occasional phone call or e-mail to let me know how she was doing. They never came. But I do appreciate so much that you have agreed to send pictures to my friend in Oregon.

If you prefer to remain anonymous, I understand. If you are open to the idea of providing an update once in a while, I cannot tell you how grateful we'd be. My e-mail address is . If you are ever on-line, perhaps you could register at the forums of The Cat Site. It'd be a way you could provide Booger updates without revealing your identity! Many there know her story and follow it still. She is a very special cat, loved by many. If you want to keep her to yourself, I have no choice but to accept that. Obviously I pray otherwise.

I've written to MCR to ask them to ask you if we can visit Booger. We'd drive down there any time but will be passing through VA this weekend and the weekend of Columbus Day. If you are open to the idea of us dropping by for a visit, I cannot even begin to tell you how much we would appreciate and enjoy that.

But no matter what happens, please know our offer to XXXXXXX still stands. If Booger ever needs anything, please contact us. Our cellphone is XXX-XXX-XXXX. We've had that number since 1993 and we expect to have it forever.

Thank you for "listening" to Booger's story.

Very Sincerely yours,

Laurie D. XXXXXX

I included pics of our kitties & the rescued kitties


This is the note I just sent to MCR and asked them to forward it on to Booger's new mom.

As many of you know, Booger was adopted out in January. She left NJ for Oregon. We received one update then nothing. We contacted MCR in July. In August we finally contacted Boog's adoptive mom by phone. Apparently there was a personal tragedy in her life apart from losing her job. She did not share this information with us. I understand how difficult it can be to communicate when depressed. She indicated Boog was still with her - but there were many inconsistencies in her story.

MCR contacted me only after I notified them of my conversation with Boog's previous mom in Oregon. It turns out the person from MCR that said they'd find out about Booger for me also experienced a personal tragedy during this same time frame.

It turns out the reason for the inconsistencies in Boog's new mom's story was that Boog had already left. A friend of hers from VA flew in to see her. Boog left with her, and is apparently living on a farm in VA now. I have assurances she is well cared for and loved. I choose to believe this is true, though that seed of doubt always persists without actually seeing or talking to the new mom.

I don't know if we'll ever get to meet Boog's new mom, see Boog or get direct updates. I can only pray that at the very least she will decide to join TCS and post here.

The worst case is that Boog's new mom is sending pics to someone I know and trust, and that person is forwarding them on to me.

So for now, I guess, Boog's story is ending. I still hold out hope that Boog's new mom will get in touch with me directly. But if not, once I receive those pictures, I'll have to learn how to close the book on Booger. I cannot tell you how badly I DO NOT WANT TO DO THAT.

I NEVER WANTED BOOG TO LEAVE MY LIFE ENTIRELY and had I known that was going to happen, I never would have sent her to Oregon.

But there is no way to predict personal tragedy, so I do not hold XXXXXXX responsible. I, of course, am extremely disappointed she was unable to contact us to have us help rehome Boog. That was an agreement we had. But she was depressed and scared of telling us or something.

But I guess I felt posting here would help. Some of you may have been wondering. But I wanted to share, to put my voice out there - I WANT TO SEE BOOGER AGAIN! To shout it to the universe.

And to vent my frustration and sadness.


I hope you are TRULY happy and loved, and I hope you never want for anything, ever, and that you receive the best medical care there is.

I miss your "pa-dump."
post #2 of 23
Thread Starter 
Me holding Boog last year some time - with my lap protected from her sharp claws while kneading and her drool.
post #3 of 23
What a story! I'm so glad you were there for her. I loved that whole thing!
post #4 of 23
Thread Starter 
Bless you for reading it, LOL!
post #5 of 23
Your first born!!!! Not only is it a terribly difficult thing to do (to adopt them out) but now you don't know how they are doing!! I too reach out to the parents of all my adoptees, and get highly frustrated when they won't share information (I have to get information about the orphaned Maggie (Scarlett's sister) from my vet and not the parent). Some people just don't understand why you still care about them! So frustrating!!!

I'm sorry Laurie - I hope you can reach Boog's new parents somehow and get them to understand how much you love her!
post #6 of 23
Laurie...I am so sorry that you have to go through this separation. I really hope that you can find her new mum somehow and see some more recent pictures. I can understand how much you must be missing her!

Kudos to you for caring.
post #7 of 23
Laurie and Gary,

I am sorry that this did not transpire at an earlier time when perhaps I could have driven up there and brought Boog home with me. The Breed Specific Rescue Organizations are awesome. They exist to rescue the breed from whatever situation they happen to be in. That they decided to help you rehome Boog without knowing for sure if she was a pure Main Coon, is extraordinary in my book. They don't take their job lightly, and they carefully screen the homes they are placing the cats into. You and Gary and Boog were just beset with a tremendous amount of sad coincidences. Personal deaths can leave one spinning aimlessly and I know that XXXXX now has no more cats and is having to leave her home. I doubt she would have chosen that path herself.

The other gal is not communicating with you (IMO) because she too just lost someone and is in the process of moving. When I talked to her last, her computer was about to be turned off and shoved into a box. So don't lose hope, I am praying the pictures will arrive shortly and i can send them on to you. So you and Gary can put a period at the end of the sentence of Boog's story.

You will find as you do more rescue work, that it will be harder and harder to keep tabs on the cats. You just have to trust that instinct that guided your heart to make the choice to adopt out to the person. It is funny for me, when I am at the store in town, sometimes a person will rush up to me and hug me! I don't remember faces of people well enough, and so sometimes I am startled, then they start talking about Massey, or Hooters, or Jordan, or...or..or.. at times I am invited back to their home to see the cat or cats, or they show me pictures they proudly carry in their wallet.

Those are the types of people that Breed Specific Rescues look for. Please try and rest your fears- I am certain Boog is just fine- though they might have changed her name- I will let you know the minute I hear something- I promise!
post #8 of 23
Laurie - I can feel your love for Boog thru your words and I am sure she is loved and in good care. I hope that the two of you will cross paths again someday.
post #9 of 23
Thread Starter 
Thanks MA. I'm sure MCR is a great organization and Gary and I just fell through the cracks due to a series of personal tragedies, which of course I regret very much. I do feel for those people, and of course they wouldn't have chosen that path!

But I never wanted to close the book on Booger or put a period at the end of that sentence. I think it would be wonderful if Gary and I help rescue enough cats that we can't keep track of them all. But we haven't reached that point yet - and Boog, of course, is special because she was our first. She was our baby, and the one who opened the door to them all.

I wish I could stop the anger and the crying, but I'm having a really difficult time of it. Like I said - I'm sure MCR is a great organization, and I really feel for the people affected. I didn't know the person I've been in touch with was about to pack her computer and is moving now - I thought that had already taken place. I hope the move goes well.

But for the most part, I've just been sitting here in the dark until you helped. I'm not sure why no one could communicate with me. I wonder when someone from MCR will say - thank you for seeing things from our point of view. Now I'm ready to look at them from yours.....

I do appreciate that I will be receiving current pictures of Booger. That's wonderful. I shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth, so to speak. But why they're being sent to you and not to me is a mystery that bothers me.

Sorry I'm not jumping for joy. I had expected so much more.

I'm sure Boog is in a wonderful home. But MCR didn't help rehome her. So who's to say? I feel like I should have had the option to get Booger back since things didn't work out. If she's in a wonderful home, that's excellent! Then that person would have been willing to sign the adoption agreement Gary and I now use.

And if MCR had helped rehome her, I should have been notified. Especially after enquiring.

I understand they're a wonderful org with wonderful people and they do everything they can and what has happened to me is the exception to the rule.

But I'm still crying for Boog, for our decision, and for all that's gone on. I have to ask myself - if Boog is in such a wonderful home, why wouldn't her new mom want to be in touch with us?

I don't know that she doesn't want to be. I just know I feel like there's something wrong with this picture if she doesn't.

So, for now, I turn to my cat loving community and I put it out there. I cry, I vent, and I pray.
post #10 of 23
Maybe she is afraid that you will try to take Boog back and that breaks her heart?
post #11 of 23
I hope Booger's new mom will send you updates on how she's doing... it's so obvious in your letter to her how much Booger means to you. (not that we didn't know already) I'll be keeping her in my thoughts and hoping that you get an update on her soon. It would be so nice if her new mom would join here or send you updates through email/post regularly.
post #12 of 23
Laurie, I pray Booger's new family will contact you and that you will get to see her in the flesh again.
post #13 of 23
Thread Starter 
Ady, I don't know. I don't think she knows anything about us or Boog's background. I wrote that letter and sent it to MCR with the hopes they'll forward it to Boog's new mom. If she's a good kitty mommy and Boog's happy, we have no interest in having Boog returned. Of course I want to ensure she's OK and happy.

For me, the ideal is someone who's happy to share what's up with Boog from time to time. But if Boog's happy, healthy and cared for - then if future updates won't happen because her new mom has no desire to keep her original rescuers "in the loop," then I'll have to learn to close the book on the first chapter in my "rescue life" no matter how much it bothers me.

I know enough now I don't need to rely on breed specific rescue organizations to help place kitties - I'm approved as a rescuer on Petfinder now and have deeper local resources than I did at the time. Breed specific rescue organizations are very important for many animals and many people - but I have no interest in relinquishing everything - including updates - on the animals I help place into new homes. I wasn't aware that I did that when placing Boog. I wasn't familiar with the rescue process, it says nothing about it on their site, and no papers or even anything e-mail was sent to me to read or sign or agree to. My understanding was that the agreement was between me and her adopter, and MCR helped to co-ordinate finding a home for her.

And MA - I sent a pic of Boog to MCR before they agreed to help place her. Our vet believed she was pure bred, although "worse case" thought she was a mix. MCR helps place mixed breed Maine Coons if they have many of the Maine Coon characteristics, and adopters are notified that the cats may be mixed breed.
post #14 of 23
Laurie, I hope the worst-case senario is that Booger's new mom just doesn't care to keep the original rescuers in the loop... not because she has anything to hide or anything. Although, I don't quite understand why she wouldn't want to.

I adopted Spike as a baby (he was a stray) sort of from a friend. (It's kind of long and doesn't matter much.) But every year, I send his family a Christmas card with a picture of Spike and a little 'thank-you' for allowing me to take him and love him. And I would gladly update them monthly, weekly, or daily (provided I had time) if they asked. I just think it's nice for them to see how he's doing. And they don't have nearly the emotional ties to Spike as you do to Booger.

I really hope that Boog's new mommy understands how much you love Boog, and that you're only interested in how she's doing to make sure she's happy and healthy, not to take her back.

I can't imagine how hard it is to care so much about her and not hear any news.
post #15 of 23
Maybe she isn't aware of Boog's story. Maybe the previous owner didn't fill her in. I am trying to think the best here and Hopefully she will get you letter and you will get all of the updates your heart desires.
post #16 of 23

I am glad you told us your story. I hope you find her new mom and are able to see your fur baby again.
post #17 of 23
oh Laurie, your post ripped my heart out. I'm so sorry for all the pain you and Gary are suffering right now.

I hope that you are able to find peace
post #18 of 23
Sending Boog's-new-human-contact-Laurie-soon vibes!

And sending you a hug, too...
post #19 of 23
I would be devastated if I had to find my baby a home and not know how she is doing. thats just terrible!
post #20 of 23
Laurie, I hope and do pray you will find a closure to this unpredictable time in your life. Your story touched my heart because my Mittens needed a home badly, and that's why we got him. Don't give up hope, and don't forget we are here for you!

post #21 of 23
Laurie, what a completely heart-rending tale!

Having been on the receiving end, i.e. taking in kitties who needed a new home, I can't in a million years imagine Booger's new Mum not wanting to be in touch -- unless she simply doesn't know there's another person out there waiting for that contact. I do hope and pray that your letter reaches her and she responds. If it were me, I know I would!
post #22 of 23

I was in tears just reading the post and the times you spent with Booger just seemed to touch my heart and it reminded me of many of my kitties that I used to feed and groom and for some reason or another, they just disappear one after another without a word or anything. I still hope for the best for them, that they have a better home than having to weather the forces of nature. I really do hope that Booger's new human wants to keep in touch with you. Maybe the previous lady didn't tell her anything, maybe she just wanted to keep Booger to herself. Whatever her reason is, I wish that she would come forth to you and at least let you know that your first baby is still fine and being loved by many. {{{hugs}}}
post #23 of 23
I have two cats adopted as adults. I would dearly love to meet their former families, I am really curious about the dear cats' background, especially Sam who, I believe, was with a family since he was a kitten, and given up at age 5. I want baby pictures, I want stories about what he was like! With Bailey, I am a little less curious, because I think she was a stray that escaped, and I have an odd feeling from time to time that if her "family" knew where she was, they would want her back. So there could be mixed emotions with Boog's current family.

(As as for Bailey, I have no mixed feelings about having someone else's pet, they don't deserve to have her back. She was an adult cat, and was pregnant with 10 kittens when she was found, so that serves them right for not spaying her.)
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