Update on Titan

So Mr. Kittehfur has been renamed Titan, thanks to DH. 

We've had him roughly 6 days now. At first he would not leave the carrier, but then I found him sleeping in the sink at night. Today was the 1st day he actually stayed in the sink through the morning, so I'm taking that as a good sign.

He's still VERY scared, and hisses if I get too close, but has yet to strike or bite - even though I had to put my hands in his carrier to clean it with him in it (he figured out how to turn the shower on! Now we have that completely closed off).

He seems to like toys on a stick - he won't play yet but he likes to watch me make them fly. 

And he's a GREAT litterbox user! So score all around. Here are some pics for you.

Another picture

He is very handsome! So you think he is tame or not?

Can't really tell if he's semi-feral or a scared stray just yet, but he's one of these for sure. 

I'll probably get to know more in the next few weeks when (hopefully) he becomes a bit less timid and a bit more of himself.

Sitting with Titan now... He's still in his sink bed! No hissing. Seems much better but still frightened. I'm sitting about a foot from him at head level. I'm a little scared to be this close (because I don't have gloves or anything right now) but so far so good. We've got our harp on... 

Does anyone know much about feline body language? Right now he's lying down in the bed, somewhat sideways. Ears are forward facing. His tail is wrapped around the front, slightly curved at end, no movement. Eyes always dilated at first glance but then become more normal. Much like the pic above, but a bit more relaxed looking.

Love that name Titan . He is a handsome man too :love:. He does look very, very scared and has a feral look to him. It is possible at one time in his lifetime he had human contact since he let's you get so close or he could just be scared straight and frozen in fear. I would not stare at him right now or at least avert your eyes away and blink slowly if you look at him. We will see how he comes around, but it could be much longer with Titan than with Mr. Jinx from the look in his eye. See if you can get a Feliway plug in too. Will be checking in to see how things progress :cross:

OH..... If you are fearful, he will feel that. I would be cautious, but not fearful him. After a few days of you tending to his needs, I think he will begin to relax. Just don't force a connection and take this one really extra slow.

I think you're right. He's a feral. And so TINY! That bed he's in is like a quarter of Mr. Jinx. 

DH and I have been going into the bathroom spending time with him. Very little eye contact, lots of yawning. And plenty of yummy food. 

He is still very frightened, though he is calming down if it's just me. This morning DH went in and I followed, only to find Titan actually shaking. Poor thing. 

We're getting a Feliway refill and some rescue remedy for him. 

I spent some time with him this afternoon while I was on the phone so he could hear my voice. I don't ever try to touch him or anything, although I have still made the octopus toy fly around him, because he seems to like to watch it even though he won't engage with it. 

He's calm when I'm in the room - much calmer than he was, so we are making some slow progress.

Jinx used to be exactly the same eye-wise, and you should have seen him when he was first in captivity! He was shaking, eyes all black. Poor guys!

The difference here is that I'm starting from scratch indoors instead of outdoors, so it could be more of an issue - I've never done that, so I don't know. 

It took Jinx a total of 6- 8 months to be in a place where he was friendly, so here's hoping Titan is a bit less, if only because he's already inside...

I know he's terrified but that last pic of his one eye watching you so intently is priceless. We say that our ferals call us 'monkeys' and they think we smell bad...it explains their distrustful menacing glares. :lol3:

I agree that this guy will take time. He looks a bit older and his eyes are full of distrust. From what you have described he sounds feral to me. If he had been a house pet at some point I don't think his eyes would be scared. You've already said it and I know you have done this before but it is my mission in life to caution people not to move too quickly with a feral.....please don't put your hands at risk by trying to pet him too soon. Take it super slow. Feral=wild. Just because he looks like every sweet DSH you've had, he isn't. He doesn't know a soft touch, he doesn't understand that the warm blanket you are offering is a good thing, he doesn't trust that you aren't going to try to kill him. Being a 'pet' is not a concept he knows and it will take time for him to understand you don't want to eat him. :lol3:

More Titan updates!

So, we have *some* progress. Titan will now sleep in my presence! Hooray!

He is still not eating with me there, but he's not full on staring anymore either. I keep yawning and playing harp music, so I think he's getting the picture.

I am not petting him or going too near his space, however, I am at the point where I'm sitting about 3 feet from him, and have played octopus on a stick with him in his space, and he's okay with it. He's still not engaging of course, but seems to enjoy watching it. 

He is eating everything, and he is sleeping on my sweatshirt at night. I've come in to see that he's kneaded it into comfy bedding, which is pretty cute. 

Again, still no attacking of any kind. He is really sweet. We've even had a few blinks together. I think he's workable, so I'm going to continue daily to bring him around a bit. 

DH & I may be going out of town for 3 days, but fortunately I have a neighbor that also works with ferals who will make sure his food and water look good... 

SUPER report :bigthumb: OH that is an excellent sign - the kneading in your presence !!!!!!!!!!!!! AWWW he sounds very, very sweet :heart2: I really think that he is coming out of his shell little by little and starting to trust. That is the very first important part to this process. Trust..... :rub: Just tell the neighbor to quietly come in during your absence and tend to Titan's needs quickly and calmly and not fuss too much while you are gone. He will be just fine but a little taken back by a new person. Will be interested in hearing how he reacts to her visits. :cross:

Oh is he a little DOLL! :love:

Sleeping in your presence is HUGE! And just some reassurance.... socializing goes a LOT faster when they're inside. :rub:

Awwww...... he's a lucky little guy, and he'll realize it and appreciate it soon enough.

Thank you!!! Ugh, LDG thanks for telling me that. I was starting to think it would take longer. 

I should say he didn't actually knead in my presence - I can tell he sleeps on my shirt and kneads it at night, because the next day it has black fur and has moved all around the bathroom. 

So not quite as far along as that, unfortunately!

He survived the couple of days without me and was slightly traumatized, but okay overall. He still hisses if I get too close with my hand (as in, two or three inches from his face), but still NEVER swipes or bites EVER! He hisses and shrinks away a little if he feels frightened and I pull back of course. The only reason I get that close is to give him treats (you'll see from the pic he's in the sink alot, so I try to put his food close to him, so he can see that it's food). He's actually gotten quite used to me placing food near him, esp. with a fork or spoon. If he sees it's a lump of something yummy, he gets curious. Still no eats in front of me, but he eats the minute I leave, which is better than before - was only at night. 

We're pretty comfy with each other at this point. He watched me clean the whole bathroom, and lets me clean around him with no issue. 

He likes our visits, I can tell, because if I sit on the floor, he likes to raise his head to see me.   He still watches me (kind of) but in a much more relaxed way. It's more curious, I think. I have made eye contact with him. I was avoiding it completely, but ever since I've been looking directly at him, then "kissing", then averting, he seems to have become more comfortable. I can tell he's interested in making a connection, just isn't quite sure the hows or whys yet. New pics! Notice the lump of turkey and catnip next to him! That's how close I can get with my bare hand!

What a great story and thank-you for the updates!!

Can I ask you a question?

I have a feral that I am socializing in my bathroom as well. Tonight I took a bath and hope I haven't traumatized him too badly (either by the strange water noise or by the sight of my nekkid body!).

Do you shower and use that bathroom or do you use a different one?  If so, how does he react?

Cheers!

Look at TITAN AW he really is so precious :love:. He likes that sink for sure. Pretty cool that he picked that place to "hide". Most times they hide behind the toilet, so this is good , he is out in the open and that makes it easier to get close to him. He feels your love, I can assure you of that. In time, progress will be made little by little, inch by inch :lol3:. Isn't it SO incredibly rewarding?! You saved another life too

Hi everyone and thanks!!

LOL I actually am lucky that this is a guest bathroom, so he has the run of everything, including the shower. He once figured out how to turn it on. Needless to say, it was a mess in here!

So I am feeling a little stuck with him. We're sitting together, we're placing the turkey on the sink. I offered him (in this room) two covered hiding spots and he has refused them both. So alas, the sink is his love. 

But I notice in the morning he hisses at me, but not again the rest of the day. It's like, in the morning, he forgets me. I'm wondering if I should start trying to spook feed him wet food - so in other words, hold off on giving him "treat" foods and then only offer them on a spoon while I'm there. And then take them away after I leave. What do you think?

Also, am going to pick up Rescue Remedy and Feliway today, trying to help him with the nerves... Was thinking feather toy, too...

Hi everyone,

Bittersweet news: after a long deliberation, DH & I decided to TNR Titan. Though he wasn't showing signs of aggression, he was so frightened by us that he'd shake himself into near coma. I was sad for him and could see he was miserable and felt too much like a captive. So I thought I'd do this a different way. We took care of his medical, and then today, after a rest, I opened the outside door and sat next to it. 

At first he was too afraid to move, but he kept looking and looking, and I didn't make a move. Eventually he jumped out of the sink and slowly, cautiously, moved past me. He was so sweet! He looked up at me in shock. You could just see the joy he felt. I continued talking to him, telling him it was ok. He honestly could not believe what was happening. The way he looked up at me was so thankful and happy, and finally I think he realized we were never trying to hurt him. 

So when he walked out, I let him be but kept an eye on him. He was still in the yard, walking cautiously, so I showed him that I was placing food and water for him both outside the bathroom and outside the front of the pool area. 

And how about this! He jumped up into our tree, walked across the top of the pool wall, and hours later, he's still here! Fingers crossed that he gets what we're trying to do for him and we can continue trying to socialize him in a way he's more comfortable.

mrjinx said:

Hi everyone,

Bittersweet news: after a long deliberation, DH & I decided to TNR Titan. Though he wasn't showing signs of aggression, he was so frightened by us that he'd shake himself into near coma. I was sad for him and could see he was miserable and felt too much like a captive. So I thought I'd do this a different way. We took care of his medical, and then today, after a rest, I opened the outside door and sat next to it. 

At first he was too afraid to move, but he kept looking and looking, and I didn't make a move. Eventually he jumped out of the sink and slowly, cautiously, moved past me. He was so sweet! He looked up at me in shock. You could just see the joy he felt. I continued talking to him, telling him it was ok. He honestly could not believe what was happening. The way he looked up at me was so thankful and happy, and finally I think he realized we were never trying to hurt him. 

So when he walked out, I let him be but kept an eye on him. He was still in the yard, walking cautiously, so I showed him that I was placing food and water for him both outside the bathroom and outside the front of the pool area. 

And how about this! He jumped up into our tree, walked across the top of the pool wall, and hours later, he's still here! Fingers crossed that he gets what we're trying to do for him and we can continue trying to socialize him in a way he's more comfortable.

Click to expand...

Ooooooooooooooooooo HUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is alright ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!!! Please do not beat yourself up over the decision. Sometimes that IS the most loving thing you can do for a feral cat. There are definitely times when it is more cruel to keep trying to socialize and with some cat's it can take SO many month's and even then we end up having to release them back outside. This is for the best for Titan, and you would know better than anyone. I really think he will stick around :nod: He also knows you love and care for him. It is very possible that releasing him might end up bringing him closer to you and your DH over time. Just remember this one thing, and I received this advice from a VERY, VERY experienced feral rescuer who now has the biggest TNR organization in Dupage County in Illinois, she always told me....... :"IF you decide to release that feral cat after TNR - they will tell you when they have had enough of the outdoor life - they will come to you - they will begin to rub your legs when you bring out food - those are the first signs that the feral cat is ready for indoor life. IF they stay far away from (20 feet or so), only wanting the food... then accept that and let them be free as they wish. The most important of all is that they cannot breed anymore. Feral cat's are not dumb by any stretch of the word. They know their caretaker loves them - it is totally up to them to make that connection. They are smart enough to know you care and how to take advantage of that if needed."

p.s. I have to say.... I agree with Tammy ( the lady who runs Feral Fixer's) in that Feral cat's are SO smart. I almost think they are smarter than our hand-raised, indulged, spoiled little indoor babies that we have and love so dearly :rofl: OR is it that our indoor cat's have our number :bigmouth: HMMMMMMMM maybe the indoor cat's are smarter then us..... :scratch:

Oh LDG, those ferals are definitely smarter than us.  LOL. Our indoor "feral" somehow knows the difference between my approaching with treats and my approaching with medicine. It's like she has ESP. 

I think you did the right thing by letting him back out.  He now knows you, he sees you as a food provider, which is the very first step. Keep working on him, he may still come around. 

Aw hun, you have to trust your gut on these things. :nod: And like RAFM says, you never know. He may want to come inside again some day, and he'll let you know when he's ready! :lovegrin2 :rub:

I know how hard it must have been to release Titan. But you did it out of love for him and I have to believe he knows that. It was especially poignant to read about letting the feral decide if/when to come inside.
My semi-feral escaped late last night after a week inside (and seeming very scared and depressed).
She somehow managed to push a screen out and took off. It has been devastating to lose her that way, but I am hoping to re-establish a relationship with her. But it hurts like crazy just seeing how healthy and beautiful her fur was after just a week, and knowing that I might not be able to keep her that way. She was pregnant and there won't be any more babies,forhr, so tha should help.
Bless your heart for doing what was best for your boy. I hope he stays close by so you can see that he is well and happy.
catmom5