Horrible Dining Experience!

mrblanche · Aug 9, 2011

No, I have respect for servers. And anyone can make a mistake. When their attitude, though, is "I don't have time to help you," or "That's just not my department," then I'm likely to start getting more pointed with my complaints.

Just as I would never be a policeman, I would probably never be a waiter--but I'm glad someone does it.

But a server HAS to remember who they're working for, or they have to decide they don't want tips.

Now, just personally, I wish restaurants would raise their prices, include the tip in the cost, and get rid of servers who don't earn their pay by keeping the customers happy.

And I fully support a database of "trouble customers" that a restaurant manager could consult before he took drastic steps, much the way doctors subscribe to a list of lawsuit-happy patients.

parsleysage · Aug 9, 2011

Guess I'm a lily-livered diner who will never "teach" a waiter or waitress to be better at their jobs. Except in extreme, jaw-dropping cases (which I consider the OP to have had) I always tip at least 10%. You never know when someone has sick children or parents, is barely making rent, is feeling ill but can't afford to call out, or has one of a million other things on their mind that can cause them not to want to fall down at your feet and worship you for deigning to set foot at their establishment.

I eat out a lot. A LOT. I'd bet a dinner out

that I eat out more than anyone else on this thread. And yes, I prefer an upbeat, attentive but not pushy, courteous, respectful waiter or waitress. Yes, I expect excellent service, drinks filled on time, one or two check-ins after the food has arrived, asking me about dessert before bringing my check, not checking for their tip before we're even up from the table. Yes, I find it annoying when those things don't happen, or when they happen but the waiter is surly or resigned. But I don't punish the waiter by not leaving a tip, or by leaving a penny, or by leaving a huge mess for them to clean up by dumping a cup of water on their table. I go to a meal to enjoy good food and have interesting conversations with my friends, not to be catered to by a butler, so if the food sucks (and the waiter doesn't take of it) or if the waiter is so bad that I can't enjoy the company of my friends, at that point I ask for the manager. (Note: The latter has never happened to me.)

I just try to assume the best instead of the worst, and show mercy by giving them a decent tip. I was in customer-facing service work for 8 years before getting my current job. There were days when I didn't feel well, was upset with something in my personal life, worried about an exam at uni, was hungry because I was broke, etc. I didn't work for tips but I would hope that if I had, most people would give me the benefit of the doubt instead of assuming right off that I was a lazy, rude person who didn't give a flying crap about taking care of customers.

*Yes, you SHOULD check your baggage at the door before coming to work.* But nobody is perfect. Everyone has bad days, and everyone loses their temper once in awhile. ESPECIALLY when dealing with the public. (I'm curious, mrblanche, if you work or have worked in customer service.)

But for me at least, it's all in how you look at it. My "bare minimum" tip that I give to someone who may not have been timely or as friendly as I would have preferred, could look like the "standard" tip someone else gives. I once tipped 100% on a meal at the Cheesecake Factory that included alcohol and dessert (a.k.a. NOT cheap) because I was with a large, loud, rowdy party who kept changing their minds on what they wanted and sending the poor guy scuttling back & forth to the kitchen all night. He handled it with grace and remained friendly and made our meal a smooth, very enjoyable experience. That was worth the money I paid.

In my opinion, not to tip based on one less-than-perfect experience is stingy and unattractive. And if it's 2, 3, 4, 5 times that you're getting bad service? Try talking to the manager or not visiting that establishment anymore

This turned into a rant... sorry about that! It's a touchy subject for me. Seeing how a man tips is one of the way I weed out the ones who aren't compatible with me on first dates

nerdrock · Aug 9, 2011

We always tip based on the service we get - taking into account the things the poster above me said. HOWEVER, this was by far the worst experience I have ever had, I had read a few reviews that said similar things, and I was listening to their conversation, lol, they were upbeat and cheerful to each other - so I expected the same with us. Since that did not happen - AT ALL - we just told them to keep the change. It should have been around $5-6, our bills total were around $80, but she screwed herself too by bringing us the wrong change.

Surprisingly, my review is still up on their website... whether that's because they haven't checked it yet or because they agree with what I wrote - only time will tell. I'll keep checking back on it to see if it stays up.

I work with people in retail - we have some customers that are downright NASTY but we try to be cheerful to everyone. Sometimes one person just ruins your day and makes you a bit crabby with everyone else, it shouldn't happen, but it does and I know it happens to me.

We have to get good service to tip 15%, sometimes we do tip more - but it depends on the service we get. Our standard tip for servers that do the bare minimum is 10%, it's extremely rare for us to give less than that.

melorix · Aug 9, 2011

I'm with Parsley. I've never had service so bad that I didn't leave a tip, and I've never punished a server for bad food (because that's on the cooks). I always tip at least 10% to give the benefit of the doubt if the server wasn't quite up to par. 15% for routine, decent service, and 20%+ for exceptional service.

Same way with my pizza/sandwich delivery, for that matter -- $3 for late deliveries, $5 for on time, and about $7 or $8 for fast delivery. There was a delivery guy who brought my order to me in 15 minutes versus the estimated hour and earned himself a $15 tip.

I've never waited tables or delivered food, but I do know that there is more than meets the eye in customer service jobs and just how hellacious it can be to serve people for hours on end just to make ends meet. I know how amazing it feels to get into a job where you don't have to listen to the general public day in and day out. So I empathize and still give a tip just in appreciation for the people who are in those jobs.

nerdrock · Aug 9, 2011

Originally Posted by Melorix

I'm with Parsley. I've never had service so bad that I didn't leave a tip, and I've never punished a server for bad food (because that's on the cooks).

Not sure if you're aware, but the cooks usually get a small percentage of the tips. Everywhere that Mike has worked as a cook it's been that way, he says it's standard procedure. I think he said it's something like 10%.

One thing about this place that irks me is that they say they serve fresh sushi - even then waitress admitted that it was premade.

There is a wondeful place much closer to us where you can get a good sized sushi/sashimi boat for around $35. It was enough to feed Mike and I two meals and a snack (and Leiki stole a piece, lol). They made it right in front of you as well and asked if there was anything that you didn't like and they would sub it out for you.

We're going to try Sushi Ya, the place we were originally going to go, for lunch in a couple of weeks. It's supposed to be cheap and pretty good, so hopefully!

capt_jordi · Aug 9, 2011

Originally Posted by nerdrock

Not sure if you're aware, but the cooks usually get a small percentage of the tips. Everywhere that Mike has worked as a cook it's been that way, he says it's standard procedure. I think he said it's something like 10%.

One thing about this place that irks me is that they say they serve fresh sushi - even then waitress admitted that it was premade.

There is a wondeful place much closer to us where you can get a good sized sushi/sashimi boat for around $35. It was enough to feed Mike and I two meals and a snack (and Leiki stole a piece, lol). They made it right in front of you as well and asked if there was anything that you didn't like and they would sub it out for you.

We're going to try Sushi Ya, the place we were originally going to go, for lunch in a couple of weeks. It's supposed to be cheap and pretty good, so hopefully!

Honestly I would never eat sushi at a place that didnt have the open sushi bar where you can see them prepare it. Its one thing for veggie rolls to be premade, but I want to see it happen! Although I have to say, now that we have figured out how to make our own, we will be doing that a whole lot more!

I did the server gig for about 2 weeks. It was at a restaurant on the lake and they always had live music. It was so frustrating when people would whisper their orders and then dock tips because you couldnt hear over the band and missed they said "no mayo" or something like that.
We always tip well, and very rarely do less than 10%. The only time we have done that is when we were at applebees, were ignored all night, and then the food was ice cold when we got it, we never got 2 of the drinks we ordered, and when we asked to talk to a manager, we were told they werent available. So we didnt tip, paid our bill and got out. It would be one thing if the place was busy, we were one of maybe 5 tables there.
And to make matters worse, we contacted the local franchise manager about it, were told "oh we will send you a gift cert. for a free meal!" never got it...

luvmyparker · Aug 9, 2011

What goes on in restaurants is downright scary at times. If your job is to prepare food for customers, it should be prepared the same way you'd want at home. If you're serving the customers, you should treat them the same way you'd want to be treated if you were dining out. Some people are so inconsiderate of the people PAYING there to eat though...

I had the glorious job of washing dishes at a fancy Italian place. Food was moderately priced at 15-30 dollars per plate. Well decorated, very, very clean...Where customers eat. There was rarely a complaint about food being late, even when it was PACKED and it was near impossible to keep up with cleaning the dishes.

I am the kind of person who likes SPOTLESS dishes to eat off. Even in my own home, I inspect my dishes to make sure there are no stains or anything on them before I use them. I wanted customers be sure their dishes were clean as well....Normally, the waiters/waitresses would scrape off the plates before putting them down for us to wash. When it was REALLY packed, they didn't have time to do that...and neither did we, even though I would try. My boss would yell at me to "nevermind that!" and just run them through the dishwasher. So I did, often time bits of food would be stuck on the clean plates and I wasn't allowed to take the time to clean them off. The cooks would just either scrape it off as best as they could, or arrange the food over it.

I was also religious about changing the dishwater that the pans would be washed in. However, when it was busy, I wasn't allowed. So pans were being washed in brown, greasy, floaty water. I despised it. I hated knowing customers food was being cooked in dirty pans. They would be so slimy, they'd almost fall out of my hands. On top of that, my boss smoked cigarettes in the kitchen, around the food...and would often throw his butts in the bin where hot pans would go, or on the table were the dirty plates/cutlery went. Sometimes just on the floor.So illegal and so disgusting.

It saddens me to know that even upscale restaurants have some nasty things going on behind the scenes, just hide it with courteous, fast, staff, nice decorations and an expensive menu.

rockcat · Aug 10, 2011

Originally Posted by mrblanche

No, I have respect for servers. And anyone can make a mistake. When their attitude, though, is "I don't have time to help you," or "That's just not my department," then I'm likely to start getting more pointed with my complaints.

I can certianly understand saying things out of anger.

Originally Posted by mrblanche

...

Now, just personally, I wish restaurants would raise their prices, include the tip in the cost, and get rid of servers who don't earn their pay by keeping the customers happy.

...

I agree! It would make things more equal in "serverland" too. The workhorses would be compensated for doing the sidework the slackers fail to do.

rockcat · Aug 10, 2011

Originally Posted by parsleysage

Guess I'm a lily-livered diner who will never "teach" a waiter or waitress to be better at their jobs. Except in extreme, jaw-dropping cases (which I consider the OP to have had) I always tip at least 10%. You never know when someone has sick children or parents, is barely making rent, is feeling ill but can't afford to call out, or has one of a million other things on their mind that can cause them not to want to fall down at your feet and worship you for deigning to set foot at their establishment.

I eat out a lot. A LOT. I'd bet a dinner out

that I eat out more than anyone else on this thread. And yes, I prefer an upbeat, attentive but not pushy, courteous, respectful waiter or waitress. Yes, I expect excellent service, drinks filled on time, one or two check-ins after the food has arrived, asking me about dessert before bringing my check, not checking for their tip before we're even up from the table. Yes, I find it annoying when those things don't happen, or when they happen but the waiter is surly or resigned. But I don't punish the waiter by not leaving a tip, or by leaving a penny, or by leaving a huge mess for them to clean up by dumping a cup of water on their table. I go to a meal to enjoy good food and have interesting conversations with my friends, not to be catered to by a butler, so if the food sucks (and the waiter doesn't take of it) or if the waiter is so bad that I can't enjoy the company of my friends, at that point I ask for the manager. (Note: The latter has never happened to me.)

I just try to assume the best instead of the worst, and show mercy by giving them a decent tip. I was in customer-facing service work for 8 years before getting my current job. There were days when I didn't feel well, was upset with something in my personal life, worried about an exam at uni, was hungry because I was broke, etc. I didn't work for tips but I would hope that if I had, most people would give me the benefit of the doubt instead of assuming right off that I was a lazy, rude person who didn't give a flying crap about taking care of customers.

*Yes, you SHOULD check your baggage at the door before coming to work.* But nobody is perfect. Everyone has bad days, and everyone loses their temper once in awhile. ESPECIALLY when dealing with the public. (I'm curious, mrblanche, if you work or have worked in customer service.)

But for me at least, it's all in how you look at it. My "bare minimum" tip that I give to someone who may not have been timely or as friendly as I would have preferred, could look like the "standard" tip someone else gives. I once tipped 100% on a meal at the Cheesecake Factory that included alcohol and dessert (a.k.a. NOT cheap) because I was with a large, loud, rowdy party who kept changing their minds on what they wanted and sending the poor guy scuttling back & forth to the kitchen all night. He handled it with grace and remained friendly and made our meal a smooth, very enjoyable experience. That was worth the money I paid.

In my opinion, not to tip based on one less-than-perfect experience is stingy and unattractive. And if it's 2, 3, 4, 5 times that you're getting bad service? Try talking to the manager or not visiting that establishment anymore

This turned into a rant... sorry about that! It's a touchy subject for me. Seeing how a man tips is one of the way I weed out the ones who aren't compatible with me on first dates

This is an excellent post!

mrblanche · Aug 10, 2011

Originally Posted by parsleysage

I eat out a lot. A LOT. I'd bet a dinner out

that I eat out more than anyone else on this thread.

Bet? When Dottie and I were running team as truck drivers, we ate over 600 meals per year out. Of course, the fact that we were away from home something like 325 days per year would have some influence on it.

And I have seen plenty of instances where the servers were doing their best and not getting cooperation from the kitchen. I'll call a manager over and point it out to them, in that case.

If we have a bad experience in a restaurant, we just don't go back. And I have no compunction about not tipping a bad server; to tip them just encourages them, like giving food to bears in a national park.

However, on Christmas Day last year, Dottie and I ate breakfast at the local Waffle House. In additon to our bill and a generous ($20) tip for our waitress, we gave the manager $100 to divide up amongst everybody on duty at that time, which meant they all got about $15 each.

Winchester · Aug 11, 2011

Originally Posted by mrblanche

However, on Christmas Day last year, Dottie and I ate breakfast at the local Waffle House. In additon to our bill and a generous ($20) tip for our waitress, we gave the manager $100 to divide up amongst everybody on duty at that time, which meant they all got about $15 each.

You know, you're a good man with a good wife.

3catsn1dog · Aug 12, 2011

I have to pipe my two cents in here and as avid server 'advocate' and someone who does love being a server as a job.

I have to agree that at some points MrBlanche your posts do come across as condescending...HOWEVER I actually agree with what you are saying even if I would never say it myself.

I only made 2.65 as a server in a community where the average tip is like 3 bucks. Hard to make a decent living but if you do the work and do it well you make good money.

A lot of people do not realize what does go on behind the scenes for servers so when I go out to eat I am pretty sympathetic but since I do know what the job entails Im also someone who is not forgiving when mistakes are made. I dont blame servers for cold food that is on the cooks (who in this area do not share tips with servers especially when they make 7-10 dollars more an hour than a server) I dont expect a server to jab their fingers in the food to see if its hot or not. Even looks can be decieving because something can look hot on the outside and be ice cold in the middle.

One thing I am unbending on is getting an order wrong. Im sorry but you have a note pad to write the stuff down. If you are unsure ASK ME I will make sure you have my order right. Im a picky eater but I make sure I tell my servers exactly what I want and how I want it so there are so grey areas and nothing gets messed up. One thing Im anal about is butter and sour cream. I do not like a ton of butter on baked potatoes so I always ask for my butter and sour cream on the side so I can do it myself. If it comes out with it on the bp then that is something I will deduct off the tip because the server is the last person to see the food so looks wise she better be able to catch that before brining my food out to my table.

Ugh working as a server is a love hate relationship. LOL Im one of the customers I always dreaded but the difference is I still tip good. You have to do something really bad for me to not tip. Like some people I havent ventured into an Applebees in quite some time..bad service and even worse food. I witnessed three manages gossiping very rudely and loudly about the other workers, even swearing, while standing on top on tables in a packed restaurant hanging decorations up and complaining about having to do it. My food came out ice cold, my steak was completely under cooked and practically mooing back at me and my server disappeared until it was time to present the check. Yeah never again. Needless to say after my scathing email I declined their gift card because I wouldnt use it and I wouldnt subject anyone I knew to that kind of treatment or experiance.

You know what though...now that Im thinking about going out to eat. Some of the best places Ive found are the ones you would think would make your skin crawl and have horrible food. Our local hoagie shop is amazing I love that place but if you look at it fromt the outside its like...ehhh do I wanna go in there. lol and I love me rest stop restaurants. Trucker food is the best LOL!!!!!

denice · Aug 12, 2011

Even though I have never been a server I am still sympathetic and give them the benefit of the doubt. I am still surprised when someone doesn't tip at all unless the service is really bad. I work nights and we went out to breakfast for a man who was going to another job. We went to a chain family restaurant early on a Saturday morning and we didn't call ahead. There was 14 of us and 13 different checks and our waitress was really good. She pulled tables together, kept our orders straight, and had someone help her bring out the food. Everyone was served at the same time and I heard no complaints about food being cold. She did it all with a smile. The guy sitting next to me didn't leave money for a tip and we were in line to checkout at the same time. He didn't put money on his debit card for a tip either.

mrblanche · Aug 12, 2011

Some people just don't tip. Did you check your check to see if a gratuity had been added already? Most restaurants do that with a large group.

3catsn1dog · Aug 12, 2011

In general gratuity is only added for groups of 8 or more. Atleast thats the rule of thumb I have always seen around here. I have never gone out with a group that large but I have waited on large groups and wow is that tasking sometimes. I can understand the gratuity being added but sometimes when you get a really demanding group the gratuity does not add up to the work that was done.

denice · Aug 12, 2011

The tip wasn't added to the bill. I sometimes go to another restaurant in the same chain for breakfast, always get the same thing I got that morning, and the bill was the same. I sometimes wonder if people realize that servers don't have to be paid the same minimum wage as people who do not routinely get tips. I was really impressed with her. She was a middle age lady, was very efficient and was really nice too.

3catsn1dog · Aug 12, 2011

I dont think alot of people do realize how little servers actually do make.

I know that technically workplaces are required to compensate for wages if the tips plus the hourly wage do not equal what the current minimum wage is. But even still most servers dont even get pay checks because what take home cash they get they need to claim at the end of their shift so all that tip money is taxed out of their paycheck. In all the years I worked as a server I think I got maybe if I was lucky a handful of checks with an actual cash amount but never over 10 or 20 bucks because of taxes. So all in all a server really only gets their tips and in the grand scheme of things they get hosed. The cost of living has gone up sooo much even just for groceries and gas. Yet they never get raises. I have a friend who has worked at the local Dennys for going on 5+ yrs and she still only makes 2.65 an hour.

Its pretty depressing and when you look at all the work that goes into being a server and the hassle they get and the stuff they have to do not only up front but side work and things behind the scenes. They really get jipped. I know that I would work an 8 hr shift serving with another 2 hours minimum of clean up and side work like rolling silverware and stocking my station plus stocking back of house.

mrblanche · Aug 12, 2011

Two words need to be added to every menu:

"Service compris"

Or, in other words, TIPPING OPTIONAL, SERVERS FEES INCLUDED IN FOOD PRICE.

3catsn1dog · Aug 12, 2011

Not to sound ignorant but could you further explain your post? I am actually confused as to what you mean but also the tone in which you are saying it. I dont want to leap to conclusions.

mrblanche · Aug 12, 2011

Originally Posted by 3CatsN1Dog

Not to sound ignorant but could you further explain your post? I am actually confused as to what you mean but also the tone in which you are saying it. I dont want to leap to conclusions.

"Service compris" means that the restaurant pays the servers a real wage and has raised the prices on the menu to be able to do that, so you don't have to leave a tip. You'll see that on menus all over Europe.

Since most Americans aren't acquainted with that, the English version would be necessary. Instead of paying the servers $2.30/hr, the restaurant would pay them $10 or $12 or whatever per hour. If you especially liked the service, you could leave more, but the increased price of the food would cover the cost of the wait staff.

This makes it possible for the servers, etc., to be able to buy a car, be covered by health insurance, etc. I've seen my niece work hard all evening and go home with next to nothing (she works at Olive Garden, part time, now). Of course, I've also seen her go home with a couple hundred dollars for one night. But the inconsistency makes it hard to be financially stable, know how much rent you can afford, pay car payments, etc.

There is one cruise line (Holland America) that also has that policy. You can tip if you want to, but the staff isn't allowed to do anything to make you feel like you have to. The difference is that the dining room waiters and room attendants that are paid $50/month on other cruise lines get more like $1000/month on Holland America. And yes, they usually get tips, too. A very popular cruise line to work on.

Horrible Dining Experience!

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In the kitchen with my cookies

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