Something I didn't plan...

Hi all! Well the feral girls are doing well and recovering quickly. Of my own four cats, only two showed symptoms and are not getting worse thank God!! Hope it stays that way.

Here is my new dilemma. My plan for these girls was to get them socialized and ready to go to the shelter kitten room for adoption. That time has come much too quickly for my comfort. I am quite attached to one of the three and will probably add her to my family of four. Her name is Fern. And Pixie is so brave and endearing I am finding it hard to bring her to the shelter too. She is the first to try everything life has to offer. She is trying to type right now as I sit here posting this. She is very curious despite the rough start in life. It amazes me. How can I let them go? I have never had such an experience like this before and it has brought me such joy to watch them blossom. Is this selfish on my part? How will this affect my own cats? Were these kitties meant to stay with me?

I do know Pixie would get adopted though because she is so out-going. Maybe I should let her go with Avery to the shelter and keep Fern. Fern gets along quite well with the others and my boss cat Pipsqueak seems to tolerate her. Pipsqueak is in the room too and is doing fine with the girls. Even pounced on Pixie's tail. Oh dear what to do. I do have the time for all of these cats and the finances to care for them. I just don't want my own cats upset by this. A
Though they have seen them and smelled them for over a month now so I am slowly getting everyone used to each others smells.

This was not the plan! But is there ever a plan that really goes as planned in our life with cats. I would love to have a life with these special kitty's and the story on how they came to be is amazing to me. Thanks for listening and please send me good vibes while I try to decide what to do. I only have a few days to decide or will loose my spot at the shelter.

So I am replying to my own thread But this just came directly from the shelter There is a lady that just lost her black female cat. She lost the littermate to that one a year ago. They were quite old. She wants to adopt TWO BLACK cats and wishes them to be sisters!!!!!!! So this is a sign/answer to my dilemma!! So I will bring Avery and Pixie to shelter Sunday night. And I am sure I will cry when I say goodbye to these girls.

Here is a quick story from the start and you will see why they mean so much to me.

Last October, I noticed a little black blur run through my yard. I ran to the window and saw a black kitten outside run under the neighbor's deck (a foreclosed home). I started watching daily to see if I could see the little guy again. I then saw a long-haired black kitten and then the mother, who looked pregnant again. But later found out it was just that the kittens were so hungry they kept nursing on her even as old as they were. Anyway, as the days went on and I, of course, started feeding them daily under the bush I realized there were FIVE cats total that I could tell. OMG NOW WHAT. I would see glowing eyes looking at me from under the deck. So that is when we started our relationships. I knew I had to start trapping but needed a plan as to what to do with them as I got them. That is where Animal House Shelter came in. I had a connection there and she would help me get homes for some of them if possible.

In the meantime, I built an outdoor shelter, totally insulated, with straw and an outdoor heating pad as it was going to be single digits. I was sick with worry each night thinking of them freezing to death. But they survived. I borrowed three traps from a new cat friend. And in December spent three sleepless days trapping. I couldn't leave the trap baited without me watching all the time. It was dangerously cold outside. My hands grew raw and cracked from running warm tuna and sardines back and forth from trap to my house. Of course, Pixie went in trap within three minutes. She wanted to be out of the elements. Dixie, the mother, went in at 2:30 a.m. Avery went in the next day just before dark, and then Fern decided to go in shortly thereafter. I almost couldn't see the trap as it was getting very dark. So I was sooooooooooooo thankful she went in when she did.

So from the traps I transferred them into a wire dog crate set-up in my garage with a heat lamp on it. I now had four, one more to go. And he, YOGI bear went in the whole next day just before dark. I had all FIVE and set-up appts for neuters the next day. $$$$$$$ cha-ching. Yogi and Dixie are released back outside. I will allow them to decide if they want to have that contact with me. I see them everyday and they wait to be fed. There are two more in the family that I will have to get TNR. I am sure one if the big daddy tomcat of them. The other is a black long-haired tabby, I think a male too.

So I at least got all the girls done and there won't be any more poor kittens born by them. If I had not done this, that house would have been filled with kittens under the deck by Spring with all of these girls pregnant. PHEW!!

It will be hard to say goodbye to Pixie and Avery. But I know this lady (I hope she really shows up) will give them the time they need to adjust. And Fern well, she will HAVE to stay with me. I Love her chirrups and trills. OH I am changing her name to Magilla. I went with the Yogi bear and friends to name them. Magilla suits her to a T.

You do what you feel is best for these cats. If you feel their better off with you, that they have a bond with you. Then keep them. If you feel they'll do better with this other person, and being with them will bring joy to her life, as well as theirs then give them to her.

I do in the future want to foster. But this is 1 of the reasons I don't think I could. I'd cry over every 1 that I give away. Even knowing their going to a good place I'd still cry over them.

I totally agree. This is my first experience "fostering" and it is truly rewarding but extremely difficult to let them go. I will definitely be crying and will never forget them and hope and pray this lady will love them so much. I am sure she will. She kept her other cats their whole life and is sad not to have cats in her home. So I do feel good about letting them go to her.

As for future rescues. Of course I will always help lost cats. It is hardwired in me. I just have to know the good I am doing for them and know my own cat limit I would do it all again in a heartbeat all I tell myself is that a month ago these kitties were wild outside in the elements and all the danger. We have a lot of fox around. So now they will never have to fend for themselves again!! I feel lucky to have had this experience. I am looking forward to Magilla's new life with us and our other cats. She will bring more joy into my life and hopefully my other babies.

Originally Posted by Feralvr

I totally agree. This is my first experience "fostering" and it is truly rewarding but extremely difficult to let them go. I will definitely be crying and will never forget them and hope and pray this lady will love them so much. I am sure she will. She kept her other cats their whole life and is sad not to have cats in her home. So I do feel good about letting them go to her.

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Maybe you could ask her to give you updates every once in awhile, send you pictures?

Originally Posted by My4LLMA

Maybe you could ask her to give you updates every once in awhile, send you pictures?

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That is my plan and hope. Will keep you posted on the next chapter in this saga!!!!!

It is hard to say goodbye to them, but you can't save them all and you can't keep them all. Trust me, I know what I am talking about. If you keep one or two or three, then you can't help the next one and it sounds like you know what you are doing and the cats are responding to you.

Look at it as your home being a transit station where these cats and kittens will find not all people are bad, and not all people hurt them. That is the first step towards their being adopted into a loving family.

Originally Posted by My4LLMA

I do in the future want to foster. But this is 1 of the reasons I don't think I could. I'd cry over every 1 that I give away. Even knowing their going to a good place I'd still cry over them.

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Yes, this is a real and true dilemma. But if you want to be a rescuer and fosterer and not "just only" an owner - you must let most of them go, keeping someone only now and then.

Keeping more then occasionally IS a dangerous trap for a rescuing fosterer. Im sure more than one hoarder began as such a rescuer. Why, some of the hoarders probably thinks herself to be belonging to the family of rescuers....


Human fosterers (ie fosterers of children; ex criminals or childrens to criminals or children to people with lots of grave problems, etc etc) have essentially the same problem. There was a book by the swedish woman, a legendary and very successful fosterer Lena Holfe "To LOVE just enough" about fostering children and youngs. You must give them love, lotsa love - they do NEED it - but not too much - as in the end you must practically always let them go... At best keeping in touch afterwards, but never ever pretending to be their parents.


Another aspect. If you, like me, believes cats are Gods gift to humanity. So you, by fostering and making it possible for good people to adopt them - you are actively contributing to this Heavenly gift to humanity.
You ARE helping this cat - but what you are REALLY doing is also - doing a good thing for your human fellows.

In short: you rescuer and fosterer, "you are making a difference".



Good luck!

I know that there has to be a limit to keeping the fosters. But I cannot let Magilla (fern) go. She is a gift and brings me much joy. She is a very gentle and kind soul and she reminds me of my Beloved Winky whom i had for nineteen years. I pray I am making the right decision to keep her but anything less than seems wrong to me.

I thank you for your comment about Gods gift to humanity. And I believe in that and that will put my next rescue in that light and put me in the frame of mind that I am the stepping stone for the next stage in life.

I love this site and all the caring cat lovers out there. The support is amazing

Have you ever heard the saying, "Life is what happens to us while we're making other plans?"

Originally Posted by mrblanche

Have you ever heard the saying, "Life is what happens to us while we're making other plans?"

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I LOVE that quote!!

PS.. I am trying to post my photos to my profile and having so much trouble figuring it out. Who can help with that????

Originally Posted by Feralvr

I know that there has to be a limit to keeping the fosters. But I cannot let Magilla (fern) go. She is a gift and brings me much joy. She is a very gentle and kind soul and she reminds me of my Beloved Winky whom i had for nineteen years. I...

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If you keep Magilla, you do still have at least two places for fosters. Thus, as long you do plan carefully, you are perfectly free to maneuver as you wish.

I myself believe you should keep Magilla, as your feelings are such. Keep the gift given to you.


The only question here is. When did Winky passed away, when did Magilla get born, by the best of your appreciation? May there be a connection??


Good luck!

Up at the top of TCS, there's a box under the logo. Along that box are a lot of links:

User CP .... FAQ .... Cat Games ... New Posts ... Your Cats ... Shop Menu ... &etc.

Click on the Your Cats and get a drop down menu, and choose "Add a new cat." Just fill in the information and follow the instructions. (You do need to know where the picture you want to post with the profile is located on your computer in order to upload it).

If you want someone to create a signature for you (those lovely pictures so many of us have at the bottom of our posts), you have to provide links to somewhere online of the pictures you want used, but you post a request (which information about what you want it to look like if you have thoughts/preferences) in the Signature Request Thread of The Signature Shop: http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=47 (it's free, members volunteer to do it. ). It may take a few days or weeks (depending upon how active the volunteers are on the site at the time), but they'll post a finished signature picture in the Completed Signatures thread.

And if you want to just share pictures of your kitties, you have to use an online host for the pictures - a lot of us use photobucket. It's free to register (just ignore the "upgrade to professional" requests/options). You upload the photos to photobucket. Once there, when you hover your pointer over the picture, a drop-down menu of links pops up. Scroll down to the one called IMG (Image tags), copy that link, and paste it in the post on TCS where you want the picture to appear.

You can see what it should look like by going to the Fur Pictures forum, opening any thread, and hit "quote" to any post with a picture in it - you'll see the string of the link and what it should look like.

Too much information?

Also, there is a Technical Support forum where you can ask questions about how to do stuff and get help (even with non-TCS stuff) : It's called "Tech Talk," and it's a sub-forum of the TCS Support/Announcements forum: http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=48

P.S. I LOVE the name Magilla!

We have two "cartoons" too. Our Tuxedo (Tennessee Tuxedo) and Chumley. OK - they're not best friends or co-horts in crazy capers, but individually their names SO suit them!

Originally Posted by StefanZ

If you keep Magilla, you do still have at least two places for fosters. Thus, as long you do plan carefully, you are perfectly free to maneuver as you wish.

I myself believe you should keep Magilla, as your feelings are such. Keep the gift given to you.

The only question here is. When did Winky passed away, when did Magilla get born, by the best of your appreciation? May there be a connection??


Good luck!

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Yes, I still do have the two places left for any fosters

AND OMG!!!!!!! You won't believe this Winky (date) connection and I wouldn't have thought of this if you didn't bring up about seeing if there was any connection and there is. And I am not kidding or making this up, I promise.

I found Winky in a parking lot, she was about five weeks old and totally on her own (she was my first cat ) It was two days after my honeymoon back in 1985. I remember dates extremely well, my mind is a date computer. It was October 14, 1985. So I went to look in the cat diary I keep on of all of my cats and their antics. I knew the date would have been close to the first day I saw the feral furry (Magilla) kitten run through my yard. (I am getting goosebumps ) Guess what that date was: OCTOBER 14!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Originally Posted by LDG

P.S. I LOVE the name Magilla!

We have two "cartoons" too.

Our Tuxedo (Tennessee Tuxedo) and Chumley. OK - they're not best friends or co-horts in crazy capers, but individually their names SO suit them!

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What great names! Thanks Laurie, BTW my name is Lauren
I am going to try to get pictures up. Working on it.

I can't thank you enough for all of this info. If I go one step at a time I can figure it out!! Thanks a bunch (of kittens :-)

Originally Posted by Feralvr

. It was October 14, 1985. So I went to look in the cat diary I keep on of all of my cats and their antics. I knew the date would have been close to the first day I saw the feral furry (Magilla) kitten run through my yard. (I am getting goosebumps

) Guess what that date was: OCTOBER 14!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Striking, like an omen. As you got and kept one, so you got and should keep the other too....

Although I was thinking about another variation as these two behave very similiarly. Pure coincidence?
When did Winky passed away, (=died), when was Magilla probably born?
There is some leeway for duration of pregnancy and some time after the birth too...

Im thinking about a possible wandering of souls... Ie the same soul.
I have met more than once there MAY be some connection... And if one finds it reassuring so why not?

I know it is nonsense. But sometimes I cant stop to think about it.


Good luck!

I don't think its nonsense at all, Stefan.

It is not nonsense it makes perfect sense to me and I thank you for your insight