can I get some emotional support???

Okay, I'm not sure what has gotten into me. And I feel awful to admit to everyone how I'm making such a big deal over something so small and being so weak!! But, I think it may give me the courage to do it if I write it out. Basically I'm applying to law school, and I need two letters of recommendation from two professors. And, within the past month and a half, I've been trying to get myself to go to ask my professors. The two professors I've decided to ask are really, really nice and they both encouraged me a lot, said really nice things about me while I took their classes, so there's really no reason not to be happy about going to talk to them. But somehow I just don't want to go talk to them. To a point where unless I go really soon, I may not even be able to turn in my application on time, because without the letters of recommendation, no matter what my LSAT score and GPA are, the law school will not even allow me to apply. So yea, I have no idea why I'm making SUCH a big deal out of this.

I've been sort of going through stuff lately, and I've isolated myself from people and I've just been keeping to myself and not talking to anyone. The two classes where it was necessary to work in groups and have small discussions, I dropped, and I have a feeling like one of the reasons for dropping those two specific courses was just because I didn't want to deal with people. So, basically my life at this point consists of going to classes that have like 200 people in them where no participation is required, studying and the only thing I do for fun is read fun fiction books. I haven't been hanging out with friends because somehow all the people I know that I considered friends at some point that I have the option of talking to seem so different from me and annoy me. Well, I talk to some high school friends who have moved away online but that doesn't really count. So I guess that adds to the nervousness, since even to someone who normally talks to a lot of new people all the time, going to a professor to ask for a letter of recommendation may be a bit uncomfortable, but to me it's even more so because I've been avoiding people all together. Yea, I am really angry at myself I wish I could somehow force myself to change the situation I'm in and to make myself more willing to talk to people and be among people, and then simple little tasks like asking a professor for a letter of recommendation wouldn't be so difficult!!
Anyway so I've decided to go do it tomorrow, I really just HAVE TO! Can I please get some encouragement???

This is a big deal to you, but it won't be to the professors, because it's something they're asked to do all the time. It simply comes with the job. Just ask!

Ask! just do it! wear a confidence mask and do it!
But...... if you can't do that..... can you email them?

I understand how you feel. I dreaded asking the chairperson of the nursing dept. for a reference, because she was quite strict as an instructor. However, she turned out to be very nice about the whole thing, and gave me an excellent recommendation. I'm sure it will be fine and you professors will probably be happy to do it for you. Good luck!

One , Having been in your shoes (recommendations not law school)... Two Just Go for it ... As the others noted it is par for the course for your professors

OMG! They're just people.

Go and ask each one if they have a few minutes for you to talk to him/her. When you talk to them let them know that you have decided to apply to law school and you require academic recommendations, and ask if they would be able to provide one for you.

You won't get in unless you get the references, and you won't get the references unless you ask.

Remember, they were in the same position themselves one time and had to get references for their own enrollment.

Nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

Good for you for wanting to further your education!!!

I completely understand how you feel hun, as I am the exact same way! I don't like interacting with people unless I absolutely have to.

You CAN do this though hun, and the longer you put it off, the more you'll stress out over it. Once it is done and over with, it'll be like a weight lifted.

Originally Posted by jcat

This is a big deal to you, but it won't be to the professors, because it's something they're asked to do all the time. It simply comes with the job. Just ask!

Click to expand...

Originally Posted by Carolina

Ask! just do it! wear a confidence mask and do it!
But...... if you can't do that..... can you email them?

Click to expand...

good idea, though they'd probably prefer it if you went in.

A lawyer needs to know how to approach and talk to people, after all. Show them you are up to it.

And when you do, it will be HUGELY empowering moment for you.

I have social anxiety, so I understand how you are feeling. Reasoning doesn't help, because the feeling is often irrational. Take a deep breath and just ask them.

Remember as others have said that recommendations for students are part of what they do and they get requests all the time for this sort of thing. Also, sooner is better than later, because they might be put off if you ask them to rush because you didn't ask sooner.

I would ask more than the number of professors than you need recommendations from, if you need 2, ask at least 3. That way if one won't write the recommendation or is unable to get it to you in time, you have another. Just an idea.

Good luck!

I wouldn't email them because you are going to be communicating with client and your firm's lawyers in person. Besides, depending on their ages and preferences they may not like email.

If you only need 2 recommendations it is no use to ask for 3 because you can't open them anyway so you can't pick the beat 2 Sounds like the two you have chosen have been supportive of you.

Good luck.

Take a DEEP BREATH and plan out what you want to say and how you want to say it inside your head and go for it. Youll do fine the professors you have chosen to ask seem as though they would be supportive in writing the recommendations for you.

I know how you feel though with pulling away from people and not talking to anyone. I used to be the biggest textaholic always talking to people and now I just cant stand to bother anymore. I can honestly say that I literally have one friend that I speak to in person and even then her and I sometimes are at odds because we are both moody and dont always feel like talking. I have to force myself to be nice to people in real life because I just cant stand people sometimes they irritate me and honestly it seems like Im just a mean person and I really dont care anymore. I stopped caring about what people thought about me or how they felt and I just figure if they dont like me I dont care and if I dont like them I dont care. Im happy with myself and Im happy in my life just the way it is. I dont need a lot of friends and I dont need a ton of people around me Ive got the kitties, Franklin and BF...what else do I need in life.

From your OP it sounds like your problem goes beyond asking for a couple of letters. It sounds like you are avoiding people in general. It could be a symptom of depression. Perhaps you need to talk to a therapist about your feelings.

Originally Posted by Dusty's Mom

From your OP it sounds like your problem goes beyond asking for a couple of letters. It sounds like you are avoiding people in general. It could be a symptom of depression. Perhaps you need to talk to a therapist about your feelings.

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That was my first thought, as well.

Thanks so much everyone!! Today is the day in a few hours I'll be going to talk to the professors. So far I'm feeling okay I hope I don't freak out right before I do this.

Originally Posted by Dusty's Mom

From your OP it sounds like your problem goes beyond asking for a couple of letters. It sounds like you are avoiding people in general. It could be a symptom of depression. Perhaps you need to talk to a therapist about your feelings.

Click to expand...

You are right, I am working on this bigger issue as well. For now I'd just like to get this one thing done because it's so important for me.

You can do it honey! Don't let yourself talk you out of your dream! Just go through the motions at this point and remove your thinking from the situation if it helps. Just don't let it become a habit or you will really miss out on life! I hope that you are able to work through your other issues and if you can do this, I think you are well on your way! Go you!!!!! (and I'll take some free legal advice later in life!!! )

Sounds like the anxiety problem is starting to control areas of your life. You are very wise to recognize the behavior is not desirable nor conducive for your chosen path. If at all possible can you seek some professional help so this issue doesn't continue to grow like this in important areas of your life?
You might want to try Bach's Rescue Remedy to give you some added calmness before you go talk to them. It works for many animals so why not people

I'm actually on medication for anxiety, so it's being treated, and I don't go to therapy, but I'm thinking about it. I'm not always like this, in fact this summer when I was interning I was really happy to talk to people and loved all of the people at work, but somehow I go through these stages, like now when I'm basically a vegetable and just want to do nothing and talk to no one besides people really close to me. And it's just so hard to push myself out of it and back to being the way I was before. I appreciate everyone's support sooo much though I am just really grateful for how caring and sweet everyone here is.

Anyway, it went well, it was sooo easy that I can't believe I didn't want to do it. It just felt like it required this immense amount of energy and seemed like such a hassle for no reason, I literally asked, the professors said okay and told me what they need from me, and it was done! Now the harder part, getting myself to study and improve my LSAT score

Hurray! Great job!

Glad you got it done already Good luck on your LSAT!

I'm so glad you were able to do it and now you're wondering what the big deal was!

I'm so sorry you're dealing with anxiety issues and the way it can impact your life - but at least you're aware of it, and know what to do if you don't come out of this "cycle." (I never had "anxiety" per se, but I definitely went through cycles of "in" and "out" and I do know that feeling of not wanting to deal with people. ).

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!